Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH has just joined twitter without telling me

111 replies

StrawberrytallCake · 02/09/2016 18:20

I'm a bit worried as my dh has just joined twitter, as stated - made his profile private and not joined up to me...all whilst he was supposed to be looking after our two children. Just before he made it private (he didn't realise this would happen I suspect) I had a notification that he has joined and saw who he started following within which were two relatively famous attractive sports women. He has been working late the last few nights - I know not having an affair because I know the people he was with, but if he had nothing to hide he would surely tell me?

I've got a really horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach, should I catfish or just wait and see if he tells me? Was looking forward to a nice night together tonight and now my heart is racing. Am I being over the top?

OP posts:
GarlicMist · 02/09/2016 19:03

AF's right, sweetheart, you sound extremely stressed.

You're saying you spend plenty of time together and talk easily, but what's making you feel so nervous?

Obviously you're aware of insecurities stemming from past relationships, so you probably wouldn't get in a stew about him joining Twitter unless other things were giving you pause. I've got to say, if I were expected to keep the family running single-handed and getting 'pestered' for sex, I'd not be the happiest woman around. Do you want to talk more about how things are with you?

TaytoCrisp · 02/09/2016 19:04

I'm not interested in my dhs Twitter activity, nor is he in mine. This would not bother me in the slightest. It's not the first place you would go to meet someone new for romance.

Herschellmum · 02/09/2016 19:04

I wasn't aware my partner or I needed each other permission to join social media, especially Twitter, I would understand if you had blocked you from face book, that would seem odd, but twitter sounds fairly harmless, perhaps he doesn't what to justify his interests to the world, perhaps he follows a differs political party to you, who knows, it certainly wouldn't raise alarm bells for me. But then again I would just ask him outright.

BennyTheBall · 02/09/2016 19:12

I know my dh is on Twitter, but have no idea who he follows or what he tweets.

I think you're being a bit paranoid - it's not likes he's on Tinder!

Lorelei76 · 02/09/2016 19:15

Why did you get a notification that he'd joined?
No idea what you're worried about btw.

midcenturymodern · 02/09/2016 19:18

I don't follow anyone I know irl on twitter. I use Facebook for people I know but twitter isn't like that.

Branleuse · 02/09/2016 19:20

If you think your husband is cheating or being secretive or being an arse, its a seperate issue from joining twitter. Tonnes of people have twitter. Its not dodgy

manhowdy · 02/09/2016 19:26

This notification via smart phones that someone you know has joined Twitter is all sorts of fun isn't it (not to mention a massive breach of privacy)? I know a few people caught out by it. Twitter can be pretty bad for attached men trying to pick up women. I say that as a regular user from from almost day one. So while it's not a dating site, but I would be very Hmm about a partner using it secretly.

Lorelei76 · 02/09/2016 19:28

I presume these notifications come due to some kind of email address connection? I keep all my emails separate so that's probably why I was confused. But if op DH signed up with the email she knows, then its easy to say, I see you joined Twitter.

EvansAndThePrince · 02/09/2016 19:29

Maybe h set it to private so he can follow attractive celebs without being unfairly accused of cheating Hmm

Lorelei76 · 02/09/2016 19:29

Actually I think when I joined Twitter it asked if it was okay to do that.

sonjadog · 02/09/2016 19:55

Twitter would seem to me to be the worst way to pick up anyone anywhere. Flirting in 140 characters or less.

honeybunny14 · 02/09/2016 20:18

I'm on twitter dp isn't we are friends with each other on Facebook and it says on there we are in a relationship with each other.

I only use Twitter for following famous people Blush Tom hardy for example Grinmy partner doesn't care I think you are massively over reacting.

honeybunny14 · 02/09/2016 20:20

Oh and my profile is private on twitter never dreamed of cheating on dp.

Forgettheworld · 02/09/2016 20:22

I follow about 400 celebrities on Twitter some are sexy men doesn't mean I'm cheating or love my DP less. I find it strange that when you knew he was on Twitter why didn't u mention it straight away instead of letting it eat you up?

lapsedorienteerer · 02/09/2016 20:24

I'm on Twitter to pick up real time message from school re cancelled matches, trips late back etc. Not remotely bothered whether DH is or not, certainly wouldn't follow each other. We're both on Facebook (infrequently) and are not 'friends'.

Andcake · 02/09/2016 20:29

Didn't mention to dp when I joined Twitter...Facebook...Instagram...mumsnet...snapchat...etc
It's sounds like there are other issues but your op makes You sound a controlling nightmare.

whattodowiththepoo · 02/09/2016 20:40

I don't follow my DP on Twitter she posts absolute bollocks and mainly follows celebrities from reality shows she watches.
I only really follow people to do with cycling and have it set to private and use a fake name.

CheeseAtFourpence · 02/09/2016 20:43

It's Twitter, not Tinder!

Gabilan · 02/09/2016 20:46

Twitter is rife for it. Innuendos become flirty direct messages & before you know it, boom!

Really? What am I doing wrong then? I've been on there 5 years without so much as a Wink from anyone.

Lorelei76 · 02/09/2016 20:48

There's even been a Twitter wedding, the Waterstones guy.
But this is not why your DH joined!

lulucappuccino · 02/09/2016 20:48

You're coming across as paranoid, OP.

  1. Why would he alert you to the fact that he's signed up to Twitter? It's not a big deal.
  2. Why should he automatically follow you on Twitter? He lives with you. You can communicate directly.
SherlockStones · 02/09/2016 20:59

This can't possibly be real life.

booklooker · 02/09/2016 21:01

DW joined Twitter a couple of years ago... erm... that's it really.

I think she told me when interesting stuff came up, I can't really remember as it wasn't any deal at all

AnyFucker · 02/09/2016 21:01

It sounds totally legit to me

Op sounds like she doesn't know her arse from her elbow where relationships are concerned, but having a history of shit ones will do that to a person