He wants me to quit work..

[MumOfOne14]

So my DH every week when it comes to me going to work has an absolute strop. I work 2 nights & its up to him to put our DS of 18months to bed. My DS does stir now & again, but he usually goes straight back down to sleep. I do absolutely everything else all week.. Every Bum change, baths, all meals, bedtimes(when I'm not working) & every night wake up, my DH won't do anything else, But the two nights he has him "he can't handle it" and is worried he'll lose his temper from tiredness. He's lost his temper with me in the past cos of booze & smashed a few doors in. So this is it, I'm backed into a conner of either going to work & leaving my DH miserable with what little he has to do or quit my job of 13 years. My DH only works 3 days a week too. I'm so bloody pissed off so AIBU??

So he is threatening you again with violence towards your ds :(:(

Please don't stop working but look at childcare etc do that you can leave whenever you decide to do so.

You can't be seriously asking this
He's a danger to you and your child
Get rid

op I was on a training course about how to recognise coercive control just this week. He ticks all the boxes. We also learned that coercive control is the best indicator of eventual homicide there is. Have a think about that AND LEAVE.

Contact WA and leave.

He is abusive and had threatened your child. Yes, his own child with violence.

You have learnt to keep quiet so he isn't violent, what if he becomes violent because you won't leave your job? Will you leave but still stay in the relationship?

Your love for your DC has to be at the forefront. Don't be another statistic and don't put your DS in danger.

That kind of threat would have me making plans to exit stage left. He doesn't want to lift a finger with your son and is telling you he might hurt him.

I'd be done with the relationship ASAP. He doesn't want you to get a breather from the baby.

He's trying to guilt you into quiting. Laziness is the least of the problems you have with this specimen of a man.

What if your DS doesn't learn to be quiet?

What if he does lean to be quiet and let people treat him like shit?

What if your DS learns to treat women with violence until they become docile so they don't rock the boat?

Get out now for your DS.

That's not fair Isetan
OP acknowledged upthread that she needs to consider leaving him.
I hope you do OP! Please do.
There is some really good, insightful, caring advice here.
Please take it and get out.
Be a tigress for your child. You can do this

How am I not being fair? At present she hopes he won't won't make good on his threats, is the emotional and physical wellbeing of a child worth that gamble? I personally don't think the emotional and physical wellbeing of a child is acceptable collateral damage of the power struggle between its parents. Even if the OP's H threats don't get carried out, his behaviour is still totally unacceptable.

The Op can not prioritise the safety of her child if she insists on leaving him with someone who resents him and takes no responsibility for his anger issues.

Op in your last post you say he has only just told you how he feels about your little boy, that must have come as a complete shock that he feels rage towards your tiny child.

It certainly makes me wonder is that how he really feels or is it just a threat to control you even more than he already does. Either way he certainly doesn't appear to enrich your life. Taking the step to leave is bound to take strength and courage. I'm glad you are at least considering the option. It's dead easy to type leave its another to actually do it.

Have you spoken to anyone in RL, could you move in with your mum even in the short term until you can get back on your feet? I'd be sorely tempted to get your mum & friends to help you pack up and leave while he is at work.

Good luck