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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH is trying to get me pregnant against my wishes

1002 replies

MrsHenryWinter · 13/05/2016 08:02

I can't actually believe I'm writing this, it feels like a soap storyline.

I think DH is messing with our birth control after we decided not to try for anymore children.

For background, he always wanted children, I was never very bothered either way. He recently decided to go for a vasectomy and I supported his decision. Just before the appointment he decided that he wanted one more child, although I do not want anymore children. The vasectomy was cancelled so that we had more time to talk through our options.

We talked about this endlessly and I remained adamant that I didn't want more children. There were lots of tears and we finally decided to wait a year and see how we felt then.

TMI Alert!

Back to last night: we were having sex and he tried to enter me without a condom. I pushed him off and he said sorry and got a condom. I think he put it on (it was dark) but afterwards I was very wet and asked if he'd come inside me. He got a bit huffy and said no but then got up and took the 'evidence' with him. I'm 99% certain he ejaculated inside me without my permission.

I don't know what to feel about this. Apart from going to get the morning after pill with 2 young children in tow, I'm at a loss as to what to do next.

I just feel numb.

OP posts:
DoreenLethal · 16/05/2016 07:28

You know when you wish you could just literally knock on someone's door, get their stuff and bundle them away to be safe. Yeah. That. Right. Now.

This thread really shines a light on why Women's Aid is so precious. I am in tears reading this. And I am double hard badass.

fizzyrubbish · 16/05/2016 07:30

I'd go for proper tubal litigation, my understanding is that there have been some safety issues with Esure. (Looked into it for myself last year. Don't think they do it on the NHS).

I know it's hard to wrap your head around the situation but I am glad some alarm bells are ringing and the tone of your posts are positive.

From the perspective of anyone reading this thread who is in a healthy relationship, this seems like something out of a movie. Reproductive autonomy is an universally recognised basic human right.

CheerfulYank · 16/05/2016 07:37

Yes I saw that about Essure in between my two posts. I think a tubal would be better too.

I may be wrong but I believe the OP said she never wanted children even before this man.

fizzyrubbish · 16/05/2016 07:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsHenryWinter · 16/05/2016 07:38

I absolutely do not want any more children, with anyone, ever. I want to get sterilised so it's not even possible anymore.

What's keeping me here? My entire life is here. My children are happy and secure. I have nothing left in my name. I'm happy or I was.

OP posts:
ptumbi · 16/05/2016 07:40

OP - please search for a poster names adorably.

She also was in a controlling, sexually abusive relationship, and the 'not gentle' sex left her with actual harm.

She also protested that she 'loved him', he was her husband, she is not 'easy', she's educated etc. She did eventually get away, and is doing so well now. I bet she would read her own threads now with horror,

and yours too.

Please find a way to phone or email WA. Or get one of us to do it for you?

CheerfulYank · 16/05/2016 07:41

There aren't any threads by that poster in the archives anymore ptumbi

ptumbi · 16/05/2016 07:44

ADORABLY2014

Here. She was still in my 'watching' list!

Lweji · 16/05/2016 07:50

Are your children safe?
When he's controlling all your lives?

You can go on without having children, but without major surgery hidden from your partner. That is no way to live. And what of he finds a scar?
Do you see yourself living as someone's pet? Is that how you want your children to see their mother as?
And when your children want independence and he's calling them all the time and dictating how they should dress or what they should do?

Lweji · 16/05/2016 07:52

And you're married, it doesn't matter what's in your name. (Again, part of the process of control to make you think you have nothing).
Do get legal advice and financial records.

FoggyBottom · 16/05/2016 07:55

OP just popping in to wish you good morning and all the very best strength and calmness for each day.

I hope you can use this thread as a place to think out loud, and test each idea that other posters offer you. Sometimes, people give advice and one can instinctively feel "Oh no, that's not right for me" - it's useful to be given what might feel like the "wrong" advice for you, because each suggestion & your response helps you articulate more clearly to yourself what is right for you.

You come across in this thread as genuinely nice, kind, thoughtful & smart. Too nice maybe? Hmm

Your husband is gaslighting you, and as you have told us, because he genuinely believes only he can be right. That sort of mindset can't be argued with - there is no empathy, no understanding of how others are different.. Most 'normal' people will believe their opinion is the right opinion, but they'll also understand that not everyone thinks like they do, and they'll listen, discuss, compromise. You, as a nice normal person, will always be on the back foot with your husband.

Good luck and I wish I could give you a RL hug and refuge.

Flisspaps · 16/05/2016 08:06

You can get tubal ligation on the NHS, in my area at least. I had the choice of that or Essure, which I declined due to the number of bad reports.

The down side is that ligation requires a surgical approach which is going to be impossible for OP to manage in her current situation.

Christ OP, it sounds like a living nightmare.

PacificDogwod · 16/05/2016 08:14

Just before I run for work, MrsH, are you certain that you cannot use any progesterone only contraception? There are very few contraindications for those.
Short- to medium term the contraceptive injection would be reliable and invisible and easily accessible in Primary Care.

Wishing you a good day today Thanks

FishWithABicycle · 16/05/2016 08:26

OP if you can get the appointment you need I bet we can organise a mumsnet flash mob event to cover the time you spend there. Don't know exactly what as don't know what town you need - but something nearby to the hospital that your littlest one will love spending time at so much that mummy being absent for a bit won't be missed, and several of us with similar aged kids and as many references and DRB certificates as you need can cover for you - we could even stage some photos for your phone of you being with us the whole time so that you can tell DH all about it, if that level of detail is necessary.

needastrongone · 16/05/2016 08:57

I would certainly be happy to help, I work flexibly, part time, and have 2 well rounded, balanced teenagers as testament to my parenting ability. Smile

Keep safe OP. And please keep posting if you feel it helps. Not one person on this thread has been in any doubt that your DH is a controlling, abusive man, and that you deserve far better. No one doubts that you are perfectly able to survive without him.

I think for me, considering said teenagers, I would hate for either of them (I've got a DS and a DD) to think that your type of relationship is normal, and facilitate that pattern of behaviour in their own adults lives.

You've got so much to think about, but keep thinking, and we will keep supporting. x

VioletSunshine · 16/05/2016 08:57

My children are happy and secure.

For now.

I promise you, it will not remain that way when they get older and start to develop their personalities more and their own wants and desires. They won't understand their dad's restrictions when compared to how their friends' (if they're permitted to have friends) and classmates' parents treat their children. And if they make the "mistake" of letting other kids know how their dad differs from everyone else, best case scenario they find out that their dad is not right at all, and people are understanding and kind towards them.

If you have a DD, the classic "you're not going out dressed like that young lady!" will be dialled up to 11 or more.

And if you start showing signs of not being compliant any more, he will start turning your children against you. Belittling you infront of them and undermining you.

You are in an abusive relationship, on some level you know this as your posts show. What you may not realise though, is your children are being abused by him too, even now. He may be involved and appear caring towards them at the moment, but the way he is treating you is not in the slightest a good example for him to be setting for your children. It is not a healthy environment for them to grow up in.

If you consider child neglect and parental involvement as a scale it would look like a horseshoe - with their experience on the one extreme end and, from the sounds of things, your childhood experience on the other.

And heaven help you all when he does turn violent, because that will happen as he starts to lose his grip on you all as time goes by. Even if he doesn't get violent with the children, they will notice if he is ever violent with you or reacts violently on inanimate objects. There's only so many excuses you can use to explain away punch holes in the doors and walls, and only so many times you can say "I walked into a door" before they stop thinking "my mum is just a bit clumsy".

One of the most heartbreaking things for me was how my perp's eldest would also be treading on eggshells when they came to stay with us and his dad was in a mood. The one time he sadly said it was just like how home was before his dad left. He knew exactly what was going on I'm sure.

That's no way for a child to live, in fear of their parent's moods and behaviour.

It will be awful for them, seeing their other parent that they love being treated like you are by someone they're suppose to admire, who is supposed to protect them all and be a good role model.

And when the children do something completely normal but it winds up their dad because he is very much not normal, and he takes his frustration out on you? They will feel guilty, because it's natural to feel that way, but they shouldn't feel guilty. And they'll learn to avoid doing totally normal things so their mum doesn't get hurt or punished by their dad.

You are so smart and intelligent MrsHW, that is so clear from your posts, so you definitely have it in you to handle this situation. You're already doing marvelously!

Don't be frightened by the things we're all saying here, there is still time for you to extricate you and your children from the gilded cage and do so safely. But once you've got the pressing issue of contraception sorted, you do need to start thinking of the possibilities and worse-case scenarios when it comes to staying with him. Take your time and do things carefully & methodically, definitely, but have an emergency plan in place for the worst-case if it comes up.

rainbowstardrops · 16/05/2016 09:02

After every update OP, I feel more chilled by your 'D'H.
You've now said that he's not exactly gentle when you're having sex. He's not making love - he's having sex.
This 'man' does not love you, he loves totally controlling you.

I said it way back but if he totally controls you then I fear he'll totally control the children. Now that really is chilling.

selsigfach · 16/05/2016 09:14

You're obviously both very fertile, having conceived first time at each attempt previously. Even if you do manage to have a secret sterilisation, don't you think he will be marching you to the doctors pretty sharpish wondering what is wrong with your reproductive system (because, let's face it, there won't be anything wrong with him and his super sperm)? Please help yourself by safely leaving this relationship, with support from Women's Aid. Thinking of you all weekend in horror.

DistanceCall · 16/05/2016 09:25

MrsH, I think you know, at some level, that you need to leave your husband. And take your children with you. To protect them and to have a normal, happy life.

I understand that this must be an overwhelming thought right now. But I also believe that you have had this at the back of your mind for quite some time too. First a niggle, then a doubt.

Your husband is trying to make you pregnant (and then care for a baby) so that you won't escape. This is very, very serious and very urgent. I really don't want to frighten you, but you don't have the luxury of time here.

I know that you think that everyone believes that your husband is wonderful. But if you tell people the truth, you may be surprised by their reaction. Certainly Women's Aid will believe you. Can you call them and tell them what is happening?

NameChange30 · 16/05/2016 10:21

OP, have you used this search tool to find contraceptive services near you?
www.nhs.uk/conditions/contraception-guide/pages/where-can-i-get-contraception.aspx
There must be a contraceptive or sexual health near you that is open today.
There is also BPAS and Marie Stopes, I believe they provide contraception as well as abortion services.
If none of those are an option I think you'll have to see a different GP at your regular surgery. Even if people know you've been to the doctor, they don't have to know why.

needastrongone · 16/05/2016 10:35

Does your youngest have a nap, when you might be able to make a phone call in safety? Or even have a quiet, TV related hour?

cakeycakeface · 16/05/2016 10:57

OP, I have no experience of abusive behaviour or how it might evolve. Given the set of circumstances you've described, I'm most struck by threats you say he controls you. Taking your keys to stop you going somewhere, befriending your friend's husband, etc. It's very creepy. But I also note you describe yourself as happy, you say he makes you feel cared for. I can't totally resolve that contradiction. But that may be because I do not understand abusive behaviour properly.

If I were you (and bearing in mind I cannot try predict, as others here have done, how he might react) I would be categorically clear with him that there will never be anymore children. By saying you'd discuss it in a year's time, it is possible he may convince himself you are not 100% opposed, and that if a pregnancy happened it round make the decision for you and you'd ultimately be fine with it.

After all, (in his mind) you love the other kids you didn't particularly want. Why not this one as well?

I am NOT justifying his behaviour. I think trying to get someone pregnant is horrendous. But I have a woman friend who stupidly did just that to a man and it backfired. But she was not a person I'd describe as an abuser. Just stupid and manipulative. And now a divorced single mother.

In telling him my position I'd also be honest about a decision to go and get my tubes tied. I think secretly sterilising yourself when you KNOW he is desperate for more children is wrong.

I would also get a coil while waiting for surgery and tell him I'd done this. I would tell him it was non negotiable.

I would also tell him that if I 'accidentally' fell pregnant I would have a termination. I wouldn't leave him with the impression I was unaware of what he'd tried to do.

I can't interpret absolutely his reasons for wanting another child - whether it's controlling you or just wanting a big family. I don't know him. Nevertheless, I would tell him all this knowing he's going to be crazy furious/disappointed/sad and knowing it might be the end of the relationship.

I would also take on board that he might react violently simply because that's what the consensus on this thread seems to be. It would be foolish to ignore the experiences here. But only you know for sure in your gut if that is likely. If at any point it looked like it might turn that way I'd immediately tell him I'd call the police. If it happened, I'd charge him with assault and take my pre-packed bag, the kids, and leave for good.

You will know one way or another whether you have a future with him quite quickly. But I can't imagine that lying to him or allowing him to continue trying to get you pregnant while you have secret contraception gives you any basis for a normal happy life in the long term. He needs to accept you for who you are and respect your wishes.

fifitrixibellethe1st · 16/05/2016 10:59

Am I missing something here? We’ve gone from…
“I have been with him for 8 years and it's a long time since anything physical has taken place. Apart from the subject of this thread of course.”
to
“I couldn't fake a period. We have sex everyday so he would know I wasn't bleeding. Way too much information there!”
??????????????

PurpleDaisies · 16/05/2016 11:00

fifi the op is referring to physical assault in the first post you quoted. She's stated they have sex every day elsewhere.

Lweji · 16/05/2016 11:02

Yes, the subject of this thread is not sex. It's rape, btw.

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