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Original poster

MIL and the ancient baby clothes - what to do?

100 replies

TheBlonde · 11/01/2007 17:28

When DS arrived 2 years ago so did a large box of DH's baby clothes
They are worn out/ stained/ acrylic mix/ out of fashion etc

New baby is due in March and I just discovered the clothes again

Do I bin them? recycle them? give them back to MIL?

OP posts:

Booboobedoo · 11/01/2007 17:41

Recycle/bin.

She won't remember!

I suppose you could ask your DH, but if he's anything like mine he'll get the terrible guilts about throwing anything his mother gave us away.

Best to quietly retire them, I reckon...

Marina · 11/01/2007 17:43

Keep a couple of the least awful pieces and make sure she sees the new baby wearing these at least once.
Bin the rest if they really are unfit for passing on...some recycling centres take fabrics for reuse

3rdTriMossTer · 11/01/2007 17:44

TheBlonde,

What did you do last time?

What I always do with any unwanted clothing gift is to ensure I wear it once when I am in the company of the gift giver. After that it goes at the back of my wardrobe to be put on freecycle whenever I do a sort out!

Could you do something similar, put your lo in the clothes your mil's given you once or twice and then quietly recycle them?

Or if they are really worn out, would they be any use for really messy activities where you don't want the nice clothes to get messed up?

KathyMCMLXXII · 11/01/2007 17:44

Couldn't you keep a few of the best ones in case she asks and say you haven't got space for the rest - then it will sound like you appreciate the sentimental value.
(I would have thought if there were any that weren't stained it would be a fun thing to have in the future, anyway - I would love to have baby clothes from my parents or grandparents, wouldn't you?)

marymillington · 11/01/2007 17:46

aw, sweet

when DS arrived my mum turned up with a bunch of stuff she'd kept for 34 years.

i kept one or two of the nicer bits. and lost the rest.

foxabout2pop · 11/01/2007 17:47

TheBlonde - its very sweet that your MIL kept DH's clothes all that time!!

I second what Mossy suggests - no hurt feelings and you can then get rid of them afterwards without any guilt.

You could also take some photos of the LO in them and then keep them so you can blackmail him in years to come by threatening to show them to people (new girl frinds etc) if he doesn't behave

cece · 11/01/2007 17:48

I think if she has kept them for 30 odd years she will notice if you don't use at least some ofo them.

Will she want them back for other siblings to use!?

foxabout2pop · 11/01/2007 17:49

Just think, in a few years time they'll be antiques too !!

kiwibella · 11/01/2007 18:02

I agree, it's brill that she has kept them so long but I wonder why she didn't just keep the best pieces (the stained ones ??). Have a look with dh to see what he wants to use and do a Mossy - wear them in her company. I would be tempted to give the rest back or, at least, ask what she wants to happen with them.

sexkittyinwaiting · 11/01/2007 18:17

I guess it's hard for some more than others to throw clothes away. If I were you I'd put the box away in the loft or somewhere and keep your fingers crossed

Original poster

TheBlonde · 11/01/2007 18:43

They are truly awful
I cannot bear the baby to wear any of them

Last time DH let her dress DS in some of the outfits but only briefly and I was v uncomfortable about it

PIL are weird - they wanted to recreate photos of DH as a baby but with DS (hope you know what I mean)
DH has no siblings so there's noone else for her to pass them on to

OP posts:

Booboobedoo · 11/01/2007 18:45

TheBlonde, my PIL are v. strange too, and try to manipulate us into all sorts of things.

How does your DH feel about it?

Or, if you don't want to bring it up with him, how do you think he'd feel?

I tend to get rid of things on the quiet. If I didn't, my entire house would be covered with things to my MIL's 'taste'.

Legacy · 11/01/2007 18:47

The Blonde
Re the 'recreating' photos thing, my ILs did that too - pictures of DS1 in the same pose (stealing biscuits!) in the kitchen etc.

I know it feels a bit weird, but if no harm is done, then try to just let them get on with it and bite your lip. Personally I think it's sort of 'circle of life' feelings they have, and probably harmless?

Kirton · 11/01/2007 18:49

I reckon it might be one of those things where the pleasure PILs get from seeing the dodgy clothes worn should probably be greater than the extent to which you don't like it. Remember whose baby it is and really has the power here , then say to yourself you're doing them a good turn that you don't have to and have yourself a little treat when they're gone. LO won't fit in them for long - unless they then bring the next size up of everything that they've kept, in which case sod em and bin the clothes.......

Original poster

TheBlonde · 11/01/2007 18:52

I know there are more clothes in bigger sizes - thankfully not much of that appeared for DS

We just don't have space to store items of no use but I'm not sure giving them back will work either

OP posts:

airy · 11/01/2007 19:13

I'd keep them for a while, hope they forget about them whilst new baby is small enough to fit them, unless of course you have a girl then surely they won't expect you to put them on her! lol
Then when new baby is too big to wear them anyway, I'd give them back. If she's kept them for this long, I'd feel bad about getting rid of them, there's obviously sentimental attachment there

Bucketsofdynomite · 11/01/2007 19:38

Put him in one of the stained items when you visit and make sure she notices the stain, casually suggest that most of them are like that. She'll hopefully get a reality check and buy him some new ones. If she is a knitter, give her a copy of Deborah Thingy's Trendy Knits for Babies (or something) pattern book and some wool that you actually like.

colditz · 11/01/2007 19:52

If you have washed the clothes, put the baby in the clothes and let your MIL take the photos.

She probably would have loved another baby.

Original poster

TheBlonde · 11/01/2007 19:58

I know she would have loved another baby, she was lucky to get DH after 8 losses

OP posts:

funnypeculiar · 11/01/2007 19:58

Ahhh, I'd sorry for your MIL!! I know its a bit odd, but think yourself 30 years forwards. Your muchloved DIL (or maybe not, but ykwim) has a baby - it brings back all your lovely memories of your los so long ago...wouldn't you love to see your beautiful grandchildren in those fabulous clothes you bought for them?!?!

Having said that my mum (not MIL) passed on some truely strange stuff - inc matching knitted matinee jackets for DS & I - seriously, do I strike you as a matinee jacket wearer?!
I put him in as much as I could bear for her visits (after some very vigorous washing), & kept the rest in the loft for ahem, posterity.

I leant a friend my tiny premature baby stuff (DS was a month early) and she passed it onto her sister without asking me (or so she told me, maybe it went st in the bin) .. I was gutted - really wanted that special stuff back - it wierd how clothes take on a life of their own...

controlfreaky2 · 11/01/2007 20:05

the blonde... that'll be me and my poor dil's in 20 years time.... have boxes of baby clothes in my loft....

dmo · 11/01/2007 20:46

i dont know why people keep baby clothes etc
i have nothing
when ds2 was old enough i wheeled his pram with everything piled in to the charty shop

my loft is clear nothing at all up there

christmas decorations have gone in my parents loft

divastrop · 11/01/2007 20:48

i still have a few items of dd1's(she is 8)baby clothes,and i wouldnt dream of putting them on dd2 cos they are so old fashioned now!i just kept 3 or 4 things of each childs so i can get them out when they bring their mates round in a few years and also to remind myself they were once sweet little babies(when they are shouting 'i hate you' etc).
if your mil kept them for sentimental reasons then why pass them on to be used for another baby?
personally,i would be inclined to ask her if she wants them back cos im not going to use them.but thats just my opinion,i always think its better to be honest.

Original poster

TheBlonde · 11/01/2007 20:56

I think I'm gonna have to give them back somehow (or make DH!)

OP posts:

madamez · 11/01/2007 21:12

Well, my mum passed on a batch of my (and my brothers) own baby clothes to me (unfortunately she only found them when DS was 18 months old) I passed some on to friends with baby girls, sorted out a few items that would actually fit DS< including a little pair of canvas summer shoes that had hardly been worn, and a coat Mum had made for me out of a cot blanket, and have sold the rest to an antique clothes dealer. OK, so I'm 40 which means these were 1960s babyclothes and perceived as vintage - also my mum is the sort of person who packed everything away with its original labels, etc. Don't know how old the clothes are in the OP's case, but the delaer I went to said that vintage kids wear is really hard to come by.
Also, dressing your DCs in something once or twice does no longterm harm - and the 'recreating photos' thing is a kind of trend among readers of magz like Take A Break which run regular slots where people have recreated poses from 30 years ago - siblings sitting on each other's laps, a kid wearing it's mother's old bonnet and clutchign a similar teddy. It's a kind of 'circle of life' thing and really just a bit of harmless fun.

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