Dh has put too much weight on.

[Kimononono]

I'm prepared to be flamed on this.

I I've my Dh and I can't imagine life with out him. He is a wonderful father and great husband. I do not want to leave him.

But he has put a lot of weight on in the last five years and doesn't look like the man I met. I didn't mind it at first when he started putting it on because he has a beautiful face and is tall and could still carry it off but from Christmas it's like he has gone in to over drive and has been massively over eating. His face is bloated and he looks nine months pregnant. He is 20 stone.

L

"No one is suggesting that we run around calling people names. But some are trying to stifle pithy and accurate vocabulary/opinions even in an impersonal public discussion like this"

Oh goody If these are impersonal public discussions then it should also mean that i (as a teetotal who has never been drunk) can go on the sober threads and i can start using words like lush and pisshead and saying how its not neccesary to drink all that vodka!

We're not trying to stifle them. We're trying to explain why they may be ineffective.

OP, I really hope it works out for you and your DH.

Cant find the post now but the DH who has lost 5 pounds in 4 days that is too fast and not sustainable as well as high risk for gallstones if you continue to lose weight that fast.

When i lost 10 stone (before the 4 stone regain and subsequent loss) i developed gall bladder disease (now before anyone starts 2 doctors and my surgeon told me it was due to losing weight too fast. In fact they asked me Slimming World or Weight Watchers? The surgeon was very kind to me and when i made a private appointment to see him after being told i would have to live with frequent gallstone pain for another YEAR everytime i ate SOLID food not fatty food because id already lost the weight remember ....but SOLID food....the surgeon did however say to me that he wished he could use me as an example to his other patients who wouldnt believe him that heartburn is affected by weight.
Re. the gallstones he was appalled that i should have to wait a year after making all that effort .....

5 weeks later i was on his operating table under the NHS!
Add message | Report | Message poster HelenaDove Sat 02-Apr-16 23:16:07
Before that operation i had spent months having intermittent attacks where i was rolling around on the floor or the bed in excrutiating pain every time i ate solid food. I was living on slim a soups and water biscuits and tinned salmon
while trying to hold down a ten hour a night job in a sex chatline office running from room to room answering different phones.

Every time i had a very severe attack i would have the emergency on call GP come out and give me a morphine injection. The neighbours actually said they could hear me screaming. On Xmas Eve 2002 the doc had to come out for the same reason... and on Xmas Day i couldnt stand up My legs kept giving way and i had to be taken to hospital where i was kept under observation until the morphine wore off.

A later attack came at work DH had to come and pick me up help me into the car and take me to a little local hospital where a camp and v. funny doctor who would have made me laugh if i hadnt been in so much pain gave me a box of morphine pills and told me to put one under my tongue when i felt an attack coming on.

Prior to the morphine injections i had been given tramadol which did fuck all to stop the pain and i got so desperate i was taking 2 of them an hour later 2 paracetamol then nurofen anything to stop the pain.

To this day i owe my thanks to the surgeon who did my op and the doc at the local hosp who gave me those pills.

I hope no one ever has to go through what i did

The gallstones happened AFTER id lost seven stone in seven months doing Slimming World. Living on water biscuits and tinned salmon was what i had to do to prevent attacks as i waited for the operation.

Good luck with that under this Government.

Helena, this thread is about the OP's DH who is putting on a lot of weight, not loosing it too quickly.

Sorry in advance if tmi..

At dhs heaviest, I felt much the same as you, sex stopped being as pleasurable - he was too large for us to have sex as normal.

It did act as a huge catalyst and the weights retreated, it helped that he was still attractive (still cracks me up, good to talk to, attentive) and he knew that, but the physicality was limited because of the weight.

Amarok i was addressing another poster. Its bad health wise to lose weight at a rate of knots.

After all it is about health!

I know this is a very old thread but it came up in a search and I was interested to find so many people in the same situation. I was just wondering if anyone on this thread is still on here and if much has changed for you?

So many posts seem to suggest, ‘oh, your DH knows he’s fat, but don’t mention it-he will only feel crap and overeat. The desire to lose weight can only come from him’.

But reading my own posts on this thread-nearly three years ago, nothing has changed. My DH is still obese-bigger than he’s ever been. Since then, his own brother (a similar size) has dropped dead suddenly of a heart attack. Still no change.

I don’t find him physically attractive, in fact-it’s worse than that as I now find it repulsive and I hate myself for thinking like that. He is 18 stone and not terribly tall. He used to be so nice looking.

I’m not some skinny thing myself (12/14) but I make an effort to look nice and hair that he doesn’t. He won’t buy clothes as he says he doesn’t need new clothes, just needs to get thinner, yet thin means his stomach ‘overhang’ or arse is hanging out for all to see as his clothes simply don’t meet in the middle. I cook healthily, but he just eats shite as well-lots of bread, milkshakes, chocolate, cereals, biscuits etc Late into the evening. He eats so fast that I’ve barely picked up my knife and fork before he’s putting his down-it barely touches the sides.

I don’t know what to do. If his own sibling dying of a weight-related heart attack hasn’t stopped him, what will?

Sorry-I probably should have started a new thread, I just wondered if anyone on here had any inspiring stories for me two years down the line.