So....can I ask my electrician for his phone number?

[TrafficJunkie]

Or is there an etiquette which means he's not allowed to do that sort of thing? :)

Sorry, not much advice from personal experience here I'm afraid - I have been with DW since I was 19 (15 years, married 5).

It does strike me that you seem to put a level of thought into this that I had never considered though! I can't speak for all men, but a direct approach is most likely to work just fine and might even be required, since a gentleman might not want to seem presumptuous about your intentions if your flirting is too subtle.

Something like, "So umm I was wondering, if you're available, maybe you would like to go for a drink sometime?"

If that's too direct for your liking, then obvious friendly flirting along with the aforementioned comments about being 'handy for his girlfriend' ought to get your message across, but fair warning - I personally would find that kind of coyness a turn-off as I'd prefer a woman going for what she wants than those kind of games.

Ok that's helpful 😊 I think I can be prepared as I like - but on the day I'll probably just ramble off something incoherent 😂😂

Yes women give alot of thought into asking out a guy!

crazycatdad, you've opened up my eyes to a whole, new, refreshing world in which I might not need to be as hung up on 'the man must make the first move' protocol as before. Thank you for your valuable input.

I agree with crazycatdad.

Men do not do hints or understand things. We prefer to have it spelled out. The only surefire way to get a message across to a man is to tap it out, on his head, in morse code, with a baseball bat. Otherwise he may wonder about it, agonize for the next 30 seconds, say "Oh well, I'd better not, just in case I'm wrong" then go back to thinking about football.

I'm male, btw.

Great! Just don't blame me if goes horribly wrong, I'm probably not typical.

reddishdevil, message received and understood. My eldest daughter has been teaching me to spell things out more clearly in our daily family life. "Please could you empty the dishwasher" instead of my usual "I do get fed up of doing everything on my own. There's the dishwasher to empty again." So, I imagine men must be clueless as to my desires and intentions. Is this a typical female thing, I wonder?

I wouldn't dream of blaming you for my future actions crazycatad! I must admit I took a deep breath of relief when I read your words.

Reddishdevil, do you think men tend to spell out their intentions clearly towards the women they are attracted to?

If a reserved man, in a professional context, holds a woman's gaze for more than three (delicious and intense) seconds, smiling, and places his hand on hers when handing over a key, twice (there were two keys) is that spelling things out in your opinion?

I've got a cunning plan Next time he is at your house ask him if he does private work ( sometimes agency trades do) Then ask for his number so you can contact him then follow up with a little text saying I'm just saving you in my phone it is you sex God electrician or some such thing.Then he has your number let the text flirting commence!

This, I think it depends on the man. There are the ones who will try it on with anyone between the ages of 16 and 60, and the more usual ones who are either scared of the knockback or of the consequences if they've misinterpreted the situation. Men do run a lot of 'what ifs' in their mind before saying or doing anything, and the danger for the women is that if the man is well versed in sending out signals, there's a good chance (a) they're well practiced at it and (b) they're going to continue doing it. The thrill of the chase is more exciting than after the capture.

So in your scenario, there's nothing to stop you taking the intentions, and responding appropriately. But as with any situation, make sure you go into it with your eyes open.

Just my opinion.

Brill, thanks for answering reddishdevil. My eyes are well and truly open. Insofar as this chap is concerned I've known him, professionally only, for over a year now and I'm as sure as can be that he's not a player. He's certainly not a chatty, flirty type. I'd be tempted to add that he might get to see relatively few women in his line of work so I might be a welcome distraction in his day-to-day working life. Bless him.

Happy Sunday to you.

I hope you are feeling happy and optimistic today TrafficJunkie!

Yes! When are you next encountering the mechanic righttime?

I'm calling beginning of next week, after his week off, to fix a time for him to come over....

Meanwhile I'm getting on with work and real life, as opposed to fantasy life, and doing my best to still the butterflies in my stomach.

Please keep us all posted. x

Haha. Me too. I'm calling tomorrow to see if I can reschedule!

I discussed this thread with my brother (a plumber) this weekend. He said while always cheery he never flirts or responds to flirtatious behaviour (in case he has misread the situation). After all it is his livelihood at stake. The only time(s) he has been on dates with a customer/ex-customer is when they have asked him out, or given him their number in a manner clearly not to do with his plumbing.

Personally as a man, I would prefer a woman to just ask "if I fancied a drink sometime". If I didn't I would politely decline.

Good luck Op

It seems that more and more the direct approach is best. I think it's just the worry of rejection that's stopping me!

I don't know about you TrafficJunkie but lamlovedbyG and DrMorbius's advice is giving me new found hope to bloody well pluck up the courage!

...

You go first, please TrafficJunkie

I will!! I promise I'll try!!

Hang on.....what if he's GAY?! ARGH. Acutally; that would be fine. Rejection because I don't have a penis is easy to deal with 😂😂

righttime are you on the dating thread?

Traffic if you don't mind me saying, you seem far too wrapped up in success. This is as old as the hills. You have seen a male/female you like. You make an approach. They respond Yes or No. It's no big deal.

The less you know about the person, the increase in chance of the answer being no. He could be gay, married, engaged, in love, temporary not looking or just not that in to you. Harsh as this is, you still won't know until you ask him. This isn't meant to put you off, rather just prepare you and give you courage to ask him out.

Good luck

I am not on the dating thread, TrafficJunkie, for the simple fact that I am not dating. Is that a little shortsighted of me? Would you recommend it?

ThisIsTheRightTime DO NOT GO ON THE DATING THREAT. I stumbled across it the other week. It seems to be inhabited by "Last chance saloon Sally's" and basket cases.
Worse still they are giving each other advice on dating it is hilarious.

So, DrMorbius, I will approach that thread with great caution! Not really my scene tbh. I'm not in dating mode. I'm too busy forging slowly ahead with new work stuff, family and life after separation from (not so) DH.

However, I cannot fail to notice the undeniable charms of a handsome car mechanic in my neighbourhood. I am human after all! I've known him, professionally, for over a year now and there's something fun and frivolous happening which suits me perfectly for the time being.