DH says we are heading for a divorce.....

[Kidsarebetterthanchocolate]

DH is in the spare room as apparently my cold is stopping him sleep. He is a bad sleeper any way.

This morning he was in a foul mood and walked into our room spotted a child in the bed and went off on one about how we are heading for a divorce.

Apparently I spend all my time on the kids and he is forgotten. We spend no time together and it is all my fault.

I am not perfect. I am well aware.

My husband has a very stressful job and is either working away or out of the house 6.50am - 8 or 9pm. He then often takes calls and does more work. He works a lot at the weekend. I am a SAHM.

We have 4 kids - aged 1 -12.

We live along way from family and have only lived in the area 18 months (moved from overseas) so although I know a lot of people to say hi to I know practically no one who could babysit.

I feel like Cinderella - in so far as I seem to spend all my time clearing up after someone (DH as bad as kids), cooking, helping with homework etc etc. I never leave the kitchen/diner in an evening.

My husband is bad tempered and has brief moments of being fun dad - mostly ignores/ shouts at kids and occasional losing it moments were he is too rough with them. I feel like a referee - DH apologise to ds1 you have hurt him etc etc.

Sorry waffle.

I have a bad tempered husband, I'm not exactly loving life myself.

I don't know what to change and I don't know how.

Is everyone like me?

Thank you anyone who has managed to get this far.......

Oh come on OP put your kids first put being a mother ahead of being a wife and leave this horrible dickhead!

Your poor DS1 probably gets most of the abuse. If he was doing these things to you you would want to leave why is it ok for your kids to stick it? Honestly can't even understand why you need to be convinced to leave him

Your husband physically abuses your children. You should be taking steps to keep them safe.

It's bad enough that school are already involved. If you don't feel you can go to the police, please go and talk to the teacher responsible for safeguarding at your children's school.

If your children disclose that they are being beaten around the head (which is what 'a clip round the ear' actually is) and deliberately tripped,and it's clear that you've allowed this to happen, then there's a chance that your children will be moved to a place of safety.

You can choose to keep your children and lose the lifestyle, or risk losing the children too. The status quo is untenable when you are married to a man who is physically abusive to children.