Step right up, it's dating thread 97

[MyGastIsFlabbered]

We don't half get through these at speed!

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now)

OMG!!!!!

Jeez. I should maybe share scots details and see if he's up to this (although we haven't even come close to the relationship or exclusive chat and won't for some time).

I am messaging with an A**y off bumble but no kids thank goodness!

Not heard from him this morning. Shall I ask him if he's ever been to Thailand?

I sent a message re holidays and mentioned Thailand, let's see if he bites!!!!!

(sorry can't resist)

May not be up there on his list of irons though...

Well done waving hurray hurray hurray for you

What you should do is ....set up a date and both turn up!! That would be brilliant

Maybe Handy should arrange a date with him and stand him up?

But that would be mean though wouldn't it?

Fucking hell waving and handy! And well played waving, I think you handled that perfectly! You sure you are OK though? Just goes to show that you should trust your instincts as you knew that's what he was up to.

I have also updated my Bumble settings and will have a good old swipe later! It's weird actually, since I signed up maybe three weeks ago, there have hardly been any people on there. I maybe get 2 or 3 BumbleBots a day and that's it, so I thought that there weren't many people using it. But today, it's suddenly exploded and there are tons of people on there. Real people, not just bots!

I also got messaged by a 20 year old on Bristlr with the tiniest bum-fluffiest beard you ever saw. I'm very tempted to send an "aw bless! Come back when you can actually grow a beard" message but that would be mean, so I won't.

Nothing from MrEloqent but he's been online since I sent the message so presuming he has now read it.

Just goes to show that your gut feeling was right Waving.

Well done you for being calm and dignified.

de nada waving I have oodles more allegiance with you lot on here than some flaky immature player (sorry but that's how I view Soho) I won't be touching him with a barge pole. I'd be better off liaising with Cufflinks - at least he lives and breathes (and shags) his own values/standards. You do sound in a very good place waving wrt all this, and that's by far the most important thing.

Onwards!

My anxierty is kicking my arse today and it's all Mr2015's fault. Why can't I just get over him? This is getting bloody ridiculous.
I was feeling so good last week, like my life was going really well and I was all sorted and in control and now I am back to feeling crap, not sleeping and lost my bloody appetite again. And all because some bloke I saw for a few months is seeing someone else.
I am so, so fed up of him making me feel this way. Rationally, I know that it's been over for ages and it was not a healthy relationship for a lot of reasons. He made me feel like this a lot of the time! Not his fault though.

He just did such a number on me, really got under my skin. Another one of those "first relationships after a big breakup", so hard to let go of and get over.

Just caught up with thread. Utterly gobsmacked! Lucky Handy made the connection! Bloody men!

No response, waving But give him his due he is probably at the dentist plus he's probably messaging other women plus his tiny mind is engaged in some unknown/illogical thought process relating to his slightly bruised ego now that youve declared your hand and shown your standards (to paraphrase Mr Hussey) Haha! So if he takes the bait I'll be somewhat surprised! I have SUCH low expectations of men. Eek!!! But watch this space. I shall let you know

Right, finally able to sit down with a keyboard and type!

First of all waving I'm sorry, but, give your intuition a glass of wine right?

I'm glad you didn't tell him you knew he was messaging other women. You gave him the MS spiel, good.

And Handy well done Miss Marple! How did you know it was the same man? I know Waving has said how many DC he has, their ages, sexes, roughly his age. But was that enough for you to be able to piece it together?

MH speil I mean. WHy do I keep typing MS. Sorry. Matthew Hussey = MH

Thanks Waving Good days and bad days just about sums it up! I know I will feel better soon. Breaking up with him was worse than this and I got through it.
I just wish I could stop thinking about him/the situation/everything.
And I wish that I hadn't got back in contact with MrEloquent. I mean, I am glad I did cos it's sorted out some unfinshed business with him but the timing has turned out to be terrible! I could only face messaging him last week cos I was feeling so good about everything and now I don't.
So, I am quite glad that he hasn't responded yet.

I'm not sure that getting out there again is the answer either but I don't really feel like I'll be over Mr2015 until I'm with someone else so all I can do is keep plugging away.

Messaging a French Canadian on Bumble now!

Soho made it easy!! He message me over the weekend, commenting on something on my profile. Then again last night saying he had gone to where his kids live and staying overnight for dentist appt today. Which is what waving said this morning! I'm no super sleuth!!

Oh folk I also think about my own Mr2015 these losses get bound up with grief from previous losses. These relationships do have a certain poinance. Be super kind to yourself (and you waving )

Waving, the nerve of him saying that you freaked him out. He wanted to get rid of you out of his house in the middle of the night, after a good date and having slept together......... and because you didn't disappear obligingly in to the night, you freaked him out.

WELL SHOT OF HIM

I know that's easy for me to type but he would have driven you crazy. You didn't put any demands on him. You supported him! He leaned on you! The ONLY demand you made was that he treat you with enough courtesy and respect not to throw you out of his house after he'd slept with you and that ''freaked him out''.

handy please make a date with this guy and stand him up!

Sorry re spelling. Out with dog. Psychotherapy is the answer to it all for me. Been doing it since July. It's changed my life.