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Original poster

Re: Feeling so down after husband has left me for another woman after 30 years

978 replies

Hushabyemountain98 · 17/01/2016 22:18

I posted yesterday but was a bit too detailed.
I am feeling so down and tonight I found myself sobbing out load.
I am finding this so hard. Even though I have a supportive family and friends.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 15:39

Hi Chiconbeige,

Thank you for telling me something about your life. I really like Belgium and I like Holland even more.
Wonderful beer and cakes.
I hope it warms up for you.
xx

OP posts:
Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 15:45

Hi Pisco,
It is wonderful. I did not have any expectations for Valentines day but I never do!
So when I opened the door and the man said my name I could not believe it. They are beautiful. Roses and lilies. Just such a kind thing for my sons to do for their heartbroken Mum xx

OP posts:
Allalonenow · 13/02/2016 16:10

Hello!
How sweet of your sons to send you such a lovely surprise Hush, I hope it cheers you up over the weekend.
Flowers and kind thoughts can lift your spirits can't they.

Lucky you Chicon being in Belgium, my family are from Antwerp and I love it there, the coast is wonderful, and I love around Bastogne too. The best cakes and chocolate in the world!

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 16:24

Hello Allalone,
It is sweet of my sons to send me such a lovely surprise. It did cheer me up.
You are right flowers and kind thoughts lift the spirits.
xx

OP posts:
Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 20:19

Good evening,

Sorry to sound "needy" but are any of my MN friends out there xx

OP posts:
sparechange · 13/02/2016 20:20

Hear to listen, Hush...
Hope you are ok today Flowers

PiscoSour66 · 13/02/2016 20:27

Ha ha! I was reading it as 'Chic in beige'! And you probably are very chic in beige. Or any other colour!

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 20:47

Thank you Sparechange. I am sitting here on my own and I just felt really lonely and miserable again. I was thinking about what I have lost. Here come the tears again xx

OP posts:
WellWhoKnew · 13/02/2016 20:52

Hush - cry and cry and cry. There's nothing wrong with it. Eventually you run out of tears, I promise!

I'm around if you want a PM.

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 21:04

Thank you WellWhoKnew for your support.
I will PM you xx

OP posts:
louisatwo · 13/02/2016 21:15

Hello Hush, Sorry that you're having a sad evening. Have your family all gone now? How was it having them there? xx

WTAFF · 13/02/2016 21:17

Hello - I'm here. Sending you strong vibes. You WILL get through this. Flowers

Chiconbelge · 13/02/2016 21:44

Hello there, sorry it's tough this evening, your MN friends are here. We know you are having such a rough time - WTAFF is right, you will get through. xxx

Chiconbelge · 13/02/2016 21:47

Have you managed to eat anything this evening? Do try if you haven't xx

Allalonenow · 13/02/2016 21:50

Hey There Hush!
Sorry to hear that you are having a tearful time, just cry as much as you need to.

Then have some tea or a glass of wine, have you had dinner? If not, try to have a snack before you go to bed. As my Mother would say, Night Starvation is to be avoided at all costs Smile

Have you got a good book to read, or TV to watch? What about The Young Montalbano on BBC iPlayer?

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 21:56

Hello louisa,

Thank you for your kind message.
My sister and niece were only here for coffee yesterday.
My son went back to Uni for a couple of days but he will be back on Tuesday.
The loneliness was just overwhelming.
How is your puppy doing today. I hope he is better?
Have a good weekend xx

OP posts:
PiscoSour66 · 13/02/2016 21:59

Hello Hush. Are you ok? I've just noticed the bad timing of my earlier post, sorry for that. Weekend evenings are so very hard by yourself.

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 22:01

Thank you WTAFF for your kindness.
I still find it hard to believe that I will get through this.
Take care xx

OP posts:
Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 22:07

Thank you Chiconbeige for your kind message.
I have had a sandwich this evening.
I am just hoping that I can get through this.
I need to find some strength from some where.
Take care xx

OP posts:
Chiconbelge · 13/02/2016 22:15

You have got strength you are showing it here every day - I know it doesn't feel like that right now but we can see it. We're you able to talk to your sister? I've got two sisters and both have been through breakups - I was so proud that they felt they could talk to me. Mind you, with one of them we were in Primark and I asked her how her DP was while we were looking at duvet covers and she yelled I DONT CARE - and that's how I found out something was wrong. Xxx

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 22:15

Hello Allalonenow.

Thank you for your kind message. I am just finding it so hard going from being a couple to being so alone. Thirty years is such a long time to be with someone however bad things were at times. I am just dumped while he moves on with his life with this woman.
I don't mean to be do pathetic but I can't help it.
I have had a sandwich and a glass of wine.
I am watching the tv. I find it hard to read at the moment.
Thanks again xx

OP posts:
louisatwo · 13/02/2016 22:17

Hush,
It's always difficult when you confront the silence after visitors. And Valentines day tomorrow can be a bit of a downer as well. I am studiously ignoring it.
Is your son an active support (hope you don't mind me asking?) Some children are brilliant and some I think are a bit embarrassed or don't want to get caught up in their parents issues. It took well over a year after the end of my relationship before my daughter told me something about my ex that had I known, would have ended the relationship immediately. But she didn't want to get caught up in our issues.

Puppy is better now thank you. He's 6 months old now so not really a puppy any more but he still has that mad puppy behaviour.

Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 22:18

Hello Pisco. I am not okay but please do not think it is anything to do with your post. You are always very kind and helpful. I am just low this evening.
Xx

OP posts:
Original poster
Hushabyemountain98 · 13/02/2016 22:27

Thank you Chiconbeige for your support.
I can talk to my sister and my niece is very good as she has been in my position. I do not know how people who do not have anyone to talk to get through it! My MN friends are great help and support too.
Take Care xx

OP posts:
Angieyy1 · 13/02/2016 22:28

All the feelings you feel are allowed because your love was so strong and real ......and as you say 30 years of life with someone and then they are gone.... It's like they have died you will grieve like he has but you have extra pain because he's still here and very much alive moving on with his life ...... I know this pain and I know all the feelings .... I used throw up the thought of them going food shopping together how stupid was that ? I look back years later thinking I can't believe the thoughts that I had that made me so sick .... You will never know how strong you are untill you have no option but to be ..... But everyone is here to listen and help you through it 😊