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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

I think I'm in shock. Has this really just happened?

259 replies

Isthisreallyhappeningtome · 29/12/2015 20:39

I've had a horrible year. A horrible horrible year. I escaped a violent relationship, was made homeless with a baby, tried to commit suicide and lost a family member on Xmas day.
Tonight my friends decided to club together and take me out for a night in a town we used to go to befire we all had children. My best friends his bad very kindly has taken my DD overnight. Please bare with me I'm rambling but I'm in shock.
I had a few drinks at a new bar and we decided to go to an old bar where I used to work. I was standing there when my friend who is the bar man places a drink in front of me. A gin and lemonade with a dash of grenadine. There is only one person in the world who knows I used to drink that and I just go numb. My friends says it's from that gentlemen across the bar and sure enough there stands my estranged husband who I haven't seen in 5 years.
He was shot a year after we got married and suffered terrible PTSD and it broke down our marriage. He left to go and sort himself out and I decided to try and move on. I never stopped thinking about him, never stopped loving him and now he's here, asleep next to me. I just can't believe this is happening and genuinely think I'm going to wake up in the morning and it was all a dream. I don't even know why I'm posting here I just needed to speak to somebody or someone to tell me that this is real!

OP posts:
ssd · 29/12/2015 22:25

lovely lovely lovely Smile

Pomegranatemolasses · 29/12/2015 22:25

Gin and lemonade with a dash of grenadine?

Unbelievable Hmm

NeedsAsockamnesty · 29/12/2015 22:27

horton

I'm married to someone I haven't clapped eyes on for over 4 years,he's been legally prohibited from even talking to me since then. I have had two children within those 4 years there BC have no name is the space for father and there is no obligation to put the name of someone you know not to be the father even if you are married to him

WaitingForSnow · 29/12/2015 22:29

Horton, I war joking the thread but I hadn't thought of that. Good point!

GarlicCake · 29/12/2015 22:29

Horton - Divorce by separation is 2 years with mutual consent and 5 years without (unless it's changed lately?) So if you were out of touch you would have to wait five years.

The DD isn't the Marine's, she was from the more recent, violent ex.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 29/12/2015 22:33

Horton how would the husband be automatically put on the BC? If you turn up to register a baby and say 'father unknown' they don't do some special married people register check in case you're lying Hmm
Married women can add their husband to the BC without his presence. He wouldn't automatically get added.

GarlicCake · 29/12/2015 22:37

how would the husband be automatically put on the BC?

I was just imagining the disastrous confusions that could cause!!!!

AlwaysBeYourself · 29/12/2015 22:41

Im guessing that said "marine estranged husband" has woken up as the OP has gone very quite. Grin

CakeMountain · 29/12/2015 22:48

Marking place.

Did your friends mind?

Quornmakesmefart · 29/12/2015 22:51

Also marking place Grin

I so want this to be true...

variousthings · 29/12/2015 22:52

I'm jealous you and your mates all had the day off.

NameChanger22 · 29/12/2015 22:52

Can I tune in for part 2 tomorrow? I don't get out much so this is mildly entertaining and there is nothing in TV this Christmas.

Are you going to tell him that you're recording this for the nation on Mumsnet?

Boomingmarvellous · 29/12/2015 22:54

If you still love him I wish you all the best Smile

Just tread very carefully and make sure he has received the best treatment and is supported.

Maryz · 29/12/2015 22:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wonkylampshade · 29/12/2015 22:55

Joining in the merry band of followers- nice to read a happy thread!

FelicityFixIt · 29/12/2015 22:58

Oohhhh.

Just that really

KenDoddsDadsDog · 29/12/2015 23:00

I love grenadine

ICantThinkOfAUsernameH · 29/12/2015 23:01

shamelessly placemarking

OohMavis · 29/12/2015 23:02

do you drink cupboards?

Grin
Quornmakesmefart · 29/12/2015 23:04

Btw am I the only person who doesn't know what grenadine is? Do I need some in my life?

OohMavis · 29/12/2015 23:05

in!

MagpieCursedTea · 29/12/2015 23:05

Aww! All the best OP, hope you're enjoying your reunion.

thelouise · 29/12/2015 23:07

I sniffed my DP. He smells ok, can't a name on it which is sad because I'll never be able to write a tragic love tale about us. He is also now eyeing me with suspicion.

DurhamDurham · 29/12/2015 23:11

Grenadine is Ribena for grown ups Wine

Quornmakesmefart · 29/12/2015 23:11

I love a good sniff of DH. Weirdly I even like his niffy armpits after a gym session Blush. But when he's not smelling of armpits it's usually a mix of aftershave and homeliness Smile

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