Humm, the persistence required to wear people down to make these sweeping gestures are not signalling 'what a romantic man', they are signalling 'what a domineering controlling man'
Anything that can be rewritten as an abusive story should be stopped and thought about. And the pushing pushing to get his own way, persuading your friends to go over your head, that he alone knows what's good for you?
It may be romantic, sweeping you off your feet, decisions made for you, everything 'meant to be'
And yet, it also sounds manipulative, domineering and it's quite frankly odd to hang around the area 'preparing' to meet you for the first time in 5 years - that's a very odd thing to do surely?
And really, the buying a house could be the start of a stalking nightmare.
I'd be very wary, the sop towards 'taking it at your pace', well he's certainly not done that so far.
Please remember that although he may want to force his way into your life and pretend everything is just like it was in the good old days... Life is not the same.
You have a child.
You have just come out of an abusive relationship.
You and your child need to heal, make a new life and recover.
He has a serious mental health condition. He needs to come to terms with you moving on from him and having a child with another man. Will he hold this against you? Or generously 'forgive' you? And what kind of relationship is he going to wang with your child? He seems pushy enough to want to play happy families from the off - which would put your child in a very vulnerable position indeed. Or will he compete with the child you had without him?
So many warning signs, and I hope you stop and think amidst the wonder and magic.