Only ever asked out by men I don't fancy

[Elenismyname]

Not sure why. I mean the ones I do like never seem to be interested. Has got to the point where I am becoming fairly harsh in my rejection strategy, like why has he he misread my signals again.

Well I did read what you wrote. It wasn't hard to read it right the first time.

I'm meeting somebody later who rejected a relationship with me (wanted to shag me though) so I definitely don't think he's a dickhead. We are friends, or friendly. But it would be awful for me to obsess over what it is about me that isn't good enough. It is far better to focus on the fact that he didn't place the same value on the relationship we could have. So I'm going to hide this thread now. There's no way to 'argue' with posters who attribute toxic interpretations to what is basically a very simple healthy way of looking at rejection.

Jesus, it's subjects like this where I feel sorry for these guys!

So, a man you don't fancy asks you out, he's wasting his time and punching way above his weight (probably thanks to porn, Hollywood, delete as appropriate), but if you fancy a guy who doesn't fancy you, that's just unfair? Hmm.

The onus also seems to be on men doing all the chasing. I see no reference here to asking out the men you DO find attractive. Why not?

The poor bastards seem to be damned if they do and damned if they don't!

It sounds like OP would actually like to fancy some of the men who approach her but doesn't and obviously you can't make yourself attracted to someone. But then how do you know if someone does approach that he is not an arrogant player but a shy and sensitive guy who for the first time worked up the courage to approach someone? This could have been the case with the guy you rejected harshly, then he gets upset and doesn't approach a woman ever again because he is afraid of what she will say to him...