Boring texts - sign of him not being into me?

[DinyTancer]

Texting guy I met on OLD and have met once, good date but still early days obvs. His latest reply to a text I sent was a boring summary of his day, two lines long. I'm not saying he needs to make it exciting but it just seems to me either that he has nothing to say/is a bit dull, or that he isn't into me!
So for example I'll start a conversation about watching something we both like, he'll just reply saying "I'm doing x now, going to do x later - have you done it too?"
To be fair the previous messages were better.
I'm tempted to cut my losses. Surely at this stage if we don't have anything exciting to say we should call it quits?

I do know what you mean. You can have natural banter with some people straight away and I think it shows you are on the same wavelength.

It may well be that he is actually boring. However I would still rely on the actual date and find out in person.

I know several friends who are incredibly witty when they have the time and space to write it down.

I have several friends who are quick witted in person and come up with some fabulous one liners.

They are not the same friends.

Also, some people can be shy and can come across as very earnest until you crack the shell. If there is no physical chemistry though, that is different.

Hmm hate to say it,but you aren't being very nice to this guy. You don't k ow what you make of him,he may be the same,but your on here worrying about yourself while making him sound as if he's doing something wrong in a public forum. He shouldn't be trying to please you,just as you shouldn't him. If he was trying to hard you wouldn't like that either, fair enough if you want to move on, but take ownership of it,don't blame a guy you hardly know,that's not fair

Text messages are great for things like, "I'm in the chip shop; what do you want?"

I don't like texting people for much else though.

I really know what you mean OP. I like texting to be light hearted and fun. When there is no rapport by text it leaves me cold. Everyone wants different. I have a busy life and two kids though so I need nice texting in between dates and I think if I was young and single and able to see my date a bit more I'm not sure it would bother me quite so much. If you connected in real life maybe just accept he is a crap texter?

Texts, emails, snapchat, messenger, - all not as good as real life.

Or worse, they could be interesting in text but wear Christmas jumpers all year round in real life.

You only get to know who someone is by face to face.

Bloody hell, texts are for short factual convos, not for impressing the other person with your sparkling repartee! I hate texting long convos because I have fat fingers maybe he's the same? Meet him for another date in person and see how you feel then!

Some people hate texting.

Hmm, I’m going to go against the grain OP. I do get what you mean. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely advocate forgetting texting and meeting up IRL as often as you can, however, in the early stages (hell, and late stages too!) if you can have a bit of quick witted, flirty ‘banter’ over text or whatever it really does help make it all a bit more exciting and fun. You smile when their name pops up on your screen etc, a bit of jesting and flirtiness really does go a long way.

By the sounds of things it all sounds a bit polite and stifled IRL too. Maybe have a few drinks with each other and try and loosen him up a bit?

I don’t believe in the early stages that communication should be this hard work!

Thanks all.

Yeah, redsky you have it in one: communication is all very polite and maybe a bit stifled...

The first night we met, we had a few drinks and loosened up, then met again completely sober and it was a bit awkward.

My intention in texting was to break the ice a bit and see if we can be a bit more jokey/tease each other? Just to see a bit of personality really

He's good-looking, interesting, a really cool guy but I think quite shy - it would just be good if we could see how compatible we were personality-wise - I still feel like we haven't seen this?

He's doing all the right things so I'm reluctant to not see him again (if he wants to obvs), just sad not to feel the whole chemistry and early excitement! Will have to see if it comes.

I alternate between really liking him and then thinking we should call it quits as nothing will happen - I don't know, it's probably me!!!

it would just be good if we could see how compatible we were personality-wise - I still feel like we haven't seen this?

But you've only had one date I think it's too early to be really getting each other by text message. You need face-to-face communication otherwise you risk rushing things along and filling in all the gaps in your head along the way.

Just slow down and enjoy the journey. Don't have a fixed outcome of fiance or nothing, be open to a range of options.

Two dates redmaple albeit in quick succession - lasted about four hours each

Ah, I was going from the first line in your header yesterday, apologies.

maybe hes just shit at texting?

I wouldnt read too much into it at this stage. Youve only had two dates.

Stop. Overthinking. It. Please!

You are texting to delve deeper and establish this witty rapport. He may just be thinking "Oh Christ here's a text from DirtyTancer. I hate texting but I do want to send a reply to her".

Stop living it in your head. Stop worrying you're going to get hurt when there's no suggestion that's his agenda or your past experience. It's madness!

This is an opportunity in your life to have carefree fun. Grab it. Or swap places with me and I will.

How's it going diny?

I prefer INTERESTING chitchat too.

Maybe he is just shit at texting, as has been suggested. For me, that would be a problem. For others, who don't think that "good at texting" is an important quality, not so much.

Maybe because I spend time on here, I expect people to be able to hold a written conversation.