To think I might really have a problem!

[Starwar]

Not sure if this is the right place to put this. I'm a regular poster but have NC for this.

I think I might be depressed. I don't mean just feeling down or fed up. I have no interest in doing anything at all. I ignore my friends who have given up bothering to even contact me now. I do go to work but that's it. I fake a smile and am probably still seen as the life and soul, but it's just a show, a very tiring one at that. I come home, close the curtains and go to bed. Im annoyed if the phone rings because I just want to be left alone.

I know it's not right but I can't decide if it's just a reaction to my current situation DH is leaving and will hopefully pass when that does. I am very upset about the breakdown of our marriage but I know there is no other way. it's like my entire future had been wiped out.

He says I'm being lazy and I wonder if he is right but maybe I need to see my already stretched GP. I feel to do that would just be wasting their time. I'm just so fed up and down. I don't have anyone I can talk to about this in RL. I'm hoping someone in here will give me a virtual kick up the arse.

Sorry if this is in the wrong place

It's out if my control. That's the only way I can see it, I can't be responsible for the children's happiness anymore. He is a good father so I hope he does what's best for them. To be brutally honest if I start thinking about this having a negative effect on them too, I'm not sure I will cope!

You're right. It is out of your control. You need to concentrate on you now. He's left then?

Have you got any friends you could get round for a drink and a cry?

But you'll be talking to him at some stage? You have accepted his take on it - that it's better for the kids if you vanish into thin air; you can put him right - or at least not agree with him, present another view. No you're not responsible for their happiness, their mum and dad are, but you can influence the dad.

No, if I could influence their dad we would still be together I will try but i think it's best to let things settle. I feel a little better tonight although I'm still not sleeping. I love those children very much

Thanks Boo for the website link, I will try it out.

Depression is a horrible thing and sometimes hard to even catch while your in the midst of it :(

starwar xxx