Typically how quickly do you have sex with a new guy?

[Abundatia]

I keep hearing about the "3 date rule". I can't imagine feeling ready to bang after just 3 dates though. I find sex is better when I really know and care about the person.

You?

Anything to protect yourself that works is good isn't it, IYSWIM, even if it's not what might work for the next person

Dona the STI test is not to their detriment, I would ask if they have had a check up, when, and suggest we both get a clean bill of health.

This is another opportunity to see what kind of man you are around. A healthy kind of chap won't mind at all.

The last guy had syphilis.
I'm not joking.
He then had to take a very long course of medication.

Yes whirlpool, exactly!

I absolutely agree with STI tests. If you get checked and it turns out you have something then of course it would put the dampeners on your amour.
But I couldn't imagine sending someone and then deciding you don't fancy them...
Which is how your post reads ( to me)

WhirlpoolGalaxyM51 what is odd about not making a judgment about other people, or saying women should have sex with whom and when they want? What exactly is odd about putting sex like all else that humans engage in, within the context of history, culture, and politics and asking if the ideal of monogamy/marriage can happily co-exist alongside casual hook up and recreational sex without there being contradictions or changes to what is the dominant/or most common way to think about sex.

Well maybe you can't see it, but they are a bit odd, to me anyway! Don't know about anyone else.

I can't really understand what you're saying but asking why having sex is seen as differently from sharing food, and talking about training men like dogs, is pretty odd to me.

Three dates rule:) yes, I've heard about that. Race to base:)

I don't for a few months, because I like the dating and getting to know them. They know this, I find them sexually attractive, and it's up to them if they want to push off. It's not a game, it's how I feel. They can still drop you anyway! Or you them.

It depends on how you see sex and how you feel after it. If it would upset you if they pumped and dumped, then leave it for as long as possible to try to protect your fragile self. If you don't mind, go for it.

I completely agree with you Minx

Thank you. Wishing you good look as well xx

If I fancy someone I sleep with them on the first date.

If you find that sleeping with someone on a fist date means that they are less likely to want to go out with you and you are dissapointed by that, then you are sleeping with the wrong people.

This makes perfect sense to get STI tests

Yes, exactly, Lavenderhoney

I see no reason why having sex quickly means it's less likely to lead to a relationship, unless the man is a misogynist who thinks women should be chaste and loses respect for those who aren't. In that case I'd rather find out sooner rather than later, than wait months for sex whilst chewing my own arm off with sexual frustration only to fall in love with an undesirable!

The guy looking for a long term relationship, shag him or not, he is still "man looking for a relationship".
Totally agree with this DrMorbius. Ignoring what they say (because many will BS their way into a lady's knickers), it's what they really want that is the deciding factor.

"Wanting to see if we are sexually compatible: If sex is more than just about receiving physical pleasure, and is/or should/ is better to be about having a real mental/emotional and physical connection with someone"
TheMarxistMinx, I place no great emotional importance on sex. To me it really is just a fun activity that creates physical pleasure, and the only reason it gets better as I get to know someone is that they learn how to turn me on better with time and practice. The emotional part of relationships for me happen outside the bedroom. I do not link sex to love.

However, in my youth I did link emotions to sex and would've been really upset if I'd been "pumped and dumped". But that was because I felt sex was a "gift" I gave to men and placed importance on that being respected. Now my mindset has changed I feel in a much stronger place regarding dating and men.

"Tbh I wouldnt even go on a date with a guy I didnt want to shag."
Same here, Branleuse. I don't waste time dating men whom I might start to fancy in time. Nope, it has to be lust at first sight.