Oh dear god, DH has just given me...[underwear]

[SilentlySpeechless]

this. and he bought size L . I've never taken L in anything. And I just looked up the price We're supposed to be saving money.

You can probably get then secondhand on eBay even cheaper

But Eekaman, doesn't it make her genitals look like a cheap pre decorated B&Q Xmas tree?

Has anyone notified Swarovski's marketing department? Just imagine it in sparkly shiny stuff

And also, wondering, for those ladies who are 'fully natural' in the lady garden department - would one even see the pearls?

Why the hell is a pearl thong called a Bracli? It's the unsexiest name ever.

Oh but it sounds all faux-Italian and faux-stylish

www.lingerie.co.uk/bracli-ebony-night-classic-pearl-thong-red-72528

Wtf? Does that go up her labia?

Well, i think your link has broken their site. What was your query?

Woah, the link worked, better book a Brazilian OP.

(the NECK kind, you filthy trollops!) Oh dear, I'm much to old for this thread.

Please no one EVER show those to my DH!

Tbh, I think second hand on eBay would be five times the price.

Different market...

That's weekdays known as a right clusterfuck!

What's Bloody predictive text!

They'll not look so good with a hairy arse crack and be very ouchy if the hair gets wound round the string between the 'pearls'.

What if they break and you get a pearl up the muff?
And then a penis pushes it right up inside you?
SirPercy Risk Assessment = probability of an embarrasing 'I have a pearl up my fanny'GP visit.

• probability too high that is

Well, that's me learning something new today.

Me too andtheBand. Although he says everyone knows about things like that Never been so grateful to DS for having a nightmare! DH is asleep now, and I've only just been able to creep out of Ds's room. Really not sure what to think. I know I've been crap in the bedroom recently, have a cyst which is messing things around and due to go In for surgery next week. And now he gives me this...

DH just asked how do you wash them? I don't think I'll be getting any!

Is that meant to turn you on, OP, do you think?! The only emotion that would evoke in me is rage and sadness at how thoughtless he'd been.

Hope all goes well with your surgery

Good god. I've got a case of thrush just looking at those.

No, no and no.

Kinda opens the field up for what you'll be getting him for his next birthday!

Why, oh, why did I read the instructions on the link?

I've never seen those before but they look rather uncomfy

There are instructions?

I think it's one of my Life Rules to stay away from pants that need instructions.

Oh love, just read your post. I really hope he's a good man making a (very) misguided attempt to help you feel sexy after your surgery
Not a pushy insensitive shithead.
Good luck with the surgery