Online guy - heavy

[Goodbyemylove]

I went on a date with a guy last week, nice enough but I didn't want another date. He texted and rang, wanting to chat, he would love to see me again, just see how it goes. I said no, blocked his number and then he contacted me on whatsapp, just give me a chance, I'm a nice guy, what have you got to lose and persuaded me to see him one more time.

So after the second date today he sent me an enthusiastic text afterwards saying he would like to meet up again. I didn't feel the same so said thanks but I didn't want to pursue it any further. He texted to say he was stunned, hadn't seen it coming, was he not attractive enough etc., please don't block my number again, then he rang to say the same but said ok he wouldn't contact me.

Then he texted again to say be honest, what was it, he needs to know. Then he rang again practically begging for a shag, could he do it 'just once.'

Now he has just texted, 'I will do my absolute best to break you down. I really want you and I will do my best to get you.'

Im feeling a bit unnerved now. Why is he not listening to me? Is it enough to ignore and block?

[FolkGirl]

Why on earth did you agree to a second date with him? And how does he know what road you live on? And why did you unblock him? (Being one step ahead doesn't make sense).

Report his behaviour to the dating site, they can block him from there. Block him on everything and have no further communication with him.

Enforce your own boundaries in future. You're allowed to.

[goodbyemylove]

Re the second date, I was unsure, he persuaded me. Yes I have certainly learnt go with your instincts. My road came up in conversation as it has the name of my town in it so there is the possibility he will remember it.

Re being one step ahead, I had a stalkerish ex who used to text saying he was in the area and then turn up on the doorstep. At least I was always prepared and wouldn't answer the door (he sat in my front garden once for an hour until I threatened to call the police.)

This guy has deleted his online profile. Last text was 'speak soon ... Ish. Lol x' but nothing yesterday so hoping that's it.

[FolkGirl]

I hope that's it too.

The biggest lesson I learnt from OD was that I had led a very sheltered life!! (Even though I hadn't at all). But I had no idea about the lack of boundaries/bizarre ideas some people have!

Lesson learnt though, eh
Onwards and upwards.

[SolidGoldBrass]

Don't forget that there is immense pressure on women to be available to men, to be'nice' to men and to spend time with men who they do not actually want to spend time with. OP will have been fed stories and propaganda about how 'romantic' it is when a man keeps basically pestering for sex. She'll have been told more than once that rejecting men makes her a 'bitch'.

When it comes to dating and pulling, it's better to be polite the first time you turn someone down (it's not wrong or unreasonable in a social setting for someone to start a conversation with you, offer you a drink or maybe ask for a date). But if the person doesn't immediately back off, it's perfectly all right to be rude, then even ruder. The other person started the rudeness by not leeaving you alone when you asked to be left alone.

[DrMorbius]

OP will have been fed stories and propaganda about how 'romantic' it is when a man keeps basically pestering for sex

Total b**x, I have got through my 50 years without ever hearing anything like that. Did I miss out on this school for misogamy??? Obviously. So has practically every guy I have ever met.

[hashtagwhatever]

God what an odd ball, hope he has given up pestering you now.

[BreakingDad77]

OP will have been fed stories and propaganda about how 'romantic' it is when a man keeps basically pestering for sex

I do agree with this now that I'm older, as when I was younger I didn't for once think that pestering wasn't romantic and no one put me right.

I seem it time and time again young angry nice guys who feel they deserve sex/rl as they are a nice guy and not like their cheating player/mate/colleague.

[goodbyemylove]

If Solid means women expect to be chased/pursued as it shows a man is keen, then yes I get that.

In this case it was definitely a shag he was after.

[cleanindahouse]

misogamy

I don't think that word means what you think it means.

[DrMorbius]

misogamy LOL I am not sure I can even blame my autochecker.
To be clear that I meant misogyny not a man who hates marriage

[toffeeboffin]

Jeeese. Sounds like you had a lucky escape!

Run for them there hills, OP!