OHF - has he owned up to there being someone else yet? IME, when there is such a swift about-face concerning your relationship with him, it almost always is because he's met someone else and has switched off emotionally from the relationship with you, because he's moved all that emotion over to the new one.
When that happens, they like to re-write history for themselves, to reduce the guilty feelings - so they convince themselves that "it was never that good" or "I've been meaning to leave for ages" or "I didn't really love you in the first place" - none of which is likely to be absolutely true, but this stops them feeling guilty about letting you down. He'll probably ask you to admit that things weren't that good, that you must have known he wasn't happy and other such bollocks as well in the near future. You will remain utterly bewildered, because none of it is actually what happened - it's just how he's re-written it.
I hope you find out soon, because it does help with the anger! Gives you a focus for it, even if initially that focus is the OW, eventually you learn to point it where it belongs, at your H.
I'm so sorry he's fucking around with your working arrangements, that's ridiculous. BUt since he is, can you change your shifts? I know that means you'll have to pay for daycare, but you get some funding for that from the Govt, don't you?
I just want to reach out and hug you, because it is awful. It's heartwrenchingly appalling, especially in the middle of the night when you wake up suddenly.
When my sister's DH walked out on her, I told her she could phone me any time, day or night - she did once call me at 2am, and I talked to her until she felt better. Is there anyone who is a good enough friend who would do that for you? It does help, just knowing there is someone who you could phone if you needed to.