Step inside it's the Dating Thread 92!

[Whatsforsupper]

I'm not one for songs Or starting threads I saw the last one was full.

I shall post The Rules shortly:)

I'm on a couple over sites but there doesn't seem to be many men in my area, I get a lot of messages from people that live miles away . I am still talking to 5 different men but 3 of them live quite far away and none of them tick all my boxes ( probably being fussy ). Mr Ginger has pissed me off, he messaged me last night with excuses why he hasn't been in contact, I'm sure if he was that interested he would find time to contact me.

if he was that interested he would find time to contact me yeah, I agree with that one. So annoying isn't it

So, after writing him off, my date from Sun texted yesterday to ask if I'd had a good day. I replied, and then nothing! So I think he's just not that into me But why go quiet, why not just do the polite thing and say 'nice to meet you but I don't think there was a spark' or some other excuse. Just silence is rubbish.

It's frustrating isn't it campervan? I get this all the time and I get so annoyed waiting for people to reply, it drives me nuts and I end up questioning everything. I haven't heard from Mr Ginger today, I know he has been online, I know if he was that interested he would have messaged me.

I have just had to report someone on POF for having a offensive profile picture, this guy has messaged me twice, I haven't replied and today he changed his profile picture to a picture of his manhood, I can see why he thought it might help as it was huge, he's not that good looking so he probably thought a picture of his cock would help .

Camper did you ask him a question back? It's rude if he just ignored that. I've been told by a couple of people I "don't talk much" on text, one person even said "for someone who apparently wants a relationship you don't text much". Because I don't like all the good morning/night stuff or even texting every day. But if someone has asked me a question I will definitely reply before the end of the day because it's polite.

I'm finding it tricky knowing what to say in messages, there are loads that just send "hi" or "nice pics" make a comment about my appearance. If I like the look of them or their profile I say something equally inane back but that's generally as far as it goes.
I'm not sure how to get past this without feeling as tho I'm trying too hard & not really being myself (I'm not naturally demonstrative). I just get the impression that's unless you tell these blokes how fabulous you think they are, they cba replying.

I have chatted to a couple who seem normal but there's definitely no frission of excitement so I know it's going nowhere but I guess it's good practice!

While my EA ex loved the way I look, he always used my appearance as a means of control "I wouldn't be like this if you didn't look how you do" etc, so a "you're gorgeous" opening line automatically gets my back up (I'm no cindy Crawford btw) which I guess isn't the blokes faultbut I can't help it.

nice I was thinking about this, and I didn't actually ask him anything because he already said something about his day then asked how mine was. But it was a cheery reply, definitely enough to let him know I'm still interested. I half thought of texting yesterday, but to be honest I haven't got time for blokes who are rubbish texters.

Jelly I know what you mean, I tend not to reply to the 'hi' messages. Well unless it's someone I definitely fancy

jelly I pretty much always ignore "hi" messages too - show some initiative!!

I'm gutted. Tested Mr Scot earlier just to say are we still on for tomorrow (second date). He's sent a text saying sorry but he has to cancel. Work is v stressful and he's not in the place for starting something, he should be excited about date and all he can think about is work.

I'm a bit pissed off - I had to rearrange exH having children tomorrow night instead of tonight which has resulted in all kinds of complicated logistics. But he's the only date I've had who's given me butterflies. He was lovely.

I'm not sure how to respond - thinking of "sorry to hear things are stressful. I'm coming offline for a while, you have my number if things change". What do you think? Too cold? I want to leave it open if things do improve without sounding desperate or hurt!

Argh. Just gone on to POF to remove my profile and he's showing up as online.

Today has been shit in all kinds of ways and this is a real kick in the teeth.

Hi all, can I join?

Just signed up for online dating even though it made me feel like a piece of shit the last time I tried it out for three days.

Oh god, this stuff is weird. I've so far received pictures with no message from a guy whom I disliked on sight and have exchanged two very generic messages with a guy who only seems to like me because I indicated that I do sports several times a week. By which I meant yoga for stress relief.

I've made a horrible mistake, haven't I?

Not necessarily a mistake magical you certainly have to wade thru the dregs tho, just try to let all the bullshit wash over you.

I've had a 30 yr old messaging me asking for naked pictures.... Haha I'm 49 ffs he'd probably vom if he saw me naked. Flattering as hell tho!!

Coco, I hate it when I spot someone online in POF when they have not had time to contact you or gave blown you out, the same has happened to me today, Mr Ginger keeps giving me excuses and I'm pissed off about him talking about himself all the time, he face me several excuses as to why he hasn't been about much but seems he still gas time to go on POF everyday, I am now giving him the cold shoulder ( I really can't be bothered with him ).

magicalham, welcome to the crazy world of online dating , be prepared for cock photos and weirdo's .

Hey, : ) I'm going to sound really sad and just like a complete freck. I haven't been on a date for 8 years, ( I know, I know what's wrong with me) it's been so long I'm not sure what I'm meant to do. Should I join a dating site?

Coco and never that's so annoying isn't it, when they give you the cold shoulder but you see they're online. I almost wish you couldn't tell! Same as with Whatsapp, when you can see they've been online but haven't messaged you back.

magical sounds normal, are you into the sporty gut at all?

Greenfaith welcome! If you're up for online dating, it's worth a try!

Well... On the basis of nice's post I figured maybe he's just not a great texter, so thought I'd give him one last try and sent a 'how's your week going?' text. He replied straight away! Now we've exchanged quite a few more texts, but all chatty and work related (we work in the same field), nothing flirty and no mention of a second date Hmm...

Greenfaith, never fear! I've not been on a date since I was 20 (I'm 33 now). Somehow managed to meet xH, get married and divorced without any proper dates being involved ever. Scared shitless!

Campervan, how do I even know whether I like sporty guy? His messages so far have been utterly generic. I mean, he likes me for being sporty, apparently. I'm really not. I practice yoga daily because it helps me not have a stress induced heart attack - apart from that I'm about as sporty as a tree. I'm skinny, though, so I reckon I might pass for sporty in a picture ...

I hate whatsapp too, being able to see when someone on line is always going to cause problems .

I'm really bored with OLD at the moment, not getting many messages from new guys, maybe I have been on there too long?

I have been chatting to Mr 2 hours away for a month or so now, we have a lot in common and we text all day, he does have a few bad points but I guess I'm not going to find 'Mr perfect' as he probably doesn't exist , the main bad point is the distance and the fact he can't drive at the moment, the plus points are that he has no ties, no kids, no evil ex and he's not hung up on a ex, he has been single for quite a long time, wants a serious relationship and is not just after a quick shag. He seems to be a gentleman, he's very thoughtful and seems genuine ( but I haven't met him yet so he could just be good at texting the right thing ), hopefully we are meeting soon when I can get a day free to go and meet him.

Mr Ginger, I have given up on, I can't even be bothered to talk to him as he has annoyed me so much, he's unreliable, selfish and his organisation skills are the worst I have seen .

I am talking to a couple others but they are not that interesting and live too far away.

I have just arranged my first "date" with a guy off POF. I've really struggled with the messaging before meeting side of OLD so I decided to say yes when he asked even though we've only been talking since yesterday. A nice neutral coffee shop inside a busy garden centre has been chosen as the venue.

He seems very much on my wavelength; I agree with his outlook on life. I figured I have to start somewhere!! I'll give an update tomorrow or Sunday (because I'm working Saturday night...hands up who thought I was planning on being on the date till Sunday!!).

This is probaly my 2nd ever 1st date with someone I didn't already know.

camper I do hate being able to see who's online - am grateful I don't have whatsapp! As mentioned several times in my thread, it's not so much the "he's not that into me" thing I'm upset about - though of course that would've stung on its own - but that he bothered to say he wanted to see me again, sorted a second date and suddenly - boom, a brush off text. Someone posted the SATC clip which coined the phrase and I do love that because it is so true - but in it Berger says if the man was interested "...he's going to book that second date", so ...

jelly I have a male friend I met on POF and he is very much of the school of thought that meeting sooner rather than later is better - he wants to make sure someone's not just wanting to chat online and never meet, and see if they're compatible. We arranged a date v quickly and met within a week. Shame there was no attraction! Good luck!

Ok for boys to join in or do I need to leave the room? ;)

Can I join you all? Just stepped into the world of OLD, I'm only on tinder and I'm not looking for anything long term. So far I've been having fun on it although not met up with anyone yet.
I've met up with a guy locally a couple of times and we have had fun but that's all it is.
I got overly invested with one guy from tinder and we were supposed to meet. The timings didn't work and he is now trying to make a go with it with his ex.
Been chatting to another one, Mr builder, I gave him my number last night as he wanted to call me so perhaps that will happen later, he seems nice. I am nervous about the phone call though!

I'm just on my way out for my date. We've been WhatsApping all day but I'm still nervous. I'm not sure it'll go much further (he seems heavily into romance & I'm the most unromantic person ever) but I'm trying to keep an open mind.

Ooh good luck jellybean, I hope you aren't cringing if he is overly soppy. Let us know how you get on?

I had next Saturday pegged (in my head only) for a guy who I've been meaning to keep a free evening for. I haven't said anything to him yet as I wanted to be sure I had childcare so I don't even know if he is free. Now a few of my friends are going out for dinner who I haven't seen in a long time. Not sure what to do, if I don't meet this guy it will be weeks before it happens?

Why not let him know you wanted to see him onemorerose but tell him you really need to see your friends too. Maybe he can meet you for a drink after? :)