:(It's my fault

[Happyandsimple]

What do I expect when I allow him back into my life :(

I listened

With respect, you didn't hear what people were saying. They told you he would do this if you gave him half a chance.

Vivacia is right. You need to ring for help and get him out the house. He's deliberately harming you.

Oh no he doesn't take meds or even drink. GP can do an emergency presc to be collected tommorow. I don't kno when anyone's coming I have an appointment to be seen in the Hosp I think either end of week or beginning to see how I'm doing I can't remember.

Please be a bit calmer with me I understand what ur saying ur right ur all right. I was wrong and im sorry about that I made a mistake please stop with the I told u so :(

if you can't see to your basic care needs you are entitled to help from adult services.

Ring them. Or your GP. Tell them your partner is abusive.

We can't advise you any differently.

The thing is Happy, he's not helping you is he? It doesn't matter why you let him back and if that was a mistake or not, he's not doing what you let him back to do. If you can't mobilise or toilet yourself without passing out in pain you need to be in hospital - simple as. I care for people post-nephrectomy and we wouldn't let them out in the state you describe. Your children are being looked after, look after yourself, call an ambulance and go back to hospital. Letting him maul and prod your wound with dirty hands is a bigger infection risk than being an inpatient anyway.

Happy, people are worried about you. we can all see that he is using your illness and pain as a control strategy. we worry that he may be capable of escalating it. we want you to use the little strength you have to get some help from somewhere. we aren't attacking you sweetheart, we're all just urging you to do the best thing and get this sadistic bellend as far away from you as poss.. chin up buttercup x

I don't think anyone means "I told you so" in that way, it's that if you remember they were right before you need to do what they're telling you now. It's perfectly understandable that you let him back in hope that he'd look after you when you were so helpless, but sadly it hasn't worked out. This man is dangerous to be in charge of a sick person. He'll give you septicaemia or Lord knows what, touching a wound site with unwashed hands. I wonder if that's even what he wants. He'll be first mourner at your funeral, of course.

Absolutely what Morporkia said.

Happy, can you do us a favour and check in every so often and keep us informed of the situation? i know you are probably sleeping a lot, but i'm a mum, i'm programmed to worry about stuff!

Not attacking. Just like Morporkia said. Worried for you.

Do us a favour Mrs Cake and turn yer precognition on....

Morporkia

We are here Happy out of concern. Think about going back to hospital to get the pain under control and have the wound redressed and checked? Then they could put a care package in place to come home with.

I wish Thw lady above who said she deals with post nephrectomy can explain what sort of pain I'm in without my pain killers

I rang my chemist to see if they can deliver my meds they said they only do delivery on thus days what day are we on ? Wednesday? N I have been sleeping

I should imagine it's horribly painful.

It's Tuesday today.

How do you feel about the Police removing him? (If that happened, I'm sure there is enough knowledge here about the best way to provoke the NHS into a home nursing response or similar).

The lady who said you wouldn't have let me our in the state I am. When I was discharged I was walking to the toilet obv bent forward but now I cant do that but I wasn't like this when I left but in so much pain walkin is harder than when I was discharged

No police can't deal with that stress things need to be planned bxoz policr come il be completly on my own and I don't want to go back as impatient

Il keep ringing adult serv to remind them about me bxoz the nurse sed everythin was Don did the asses on ward

Ok - planned it is.

You wouldn't even consider very short-term readmission?

If you don't want to start by calling the police, you'll need to start by getting caring support in place. You HAVE to make someone aware of your current situation.

What opportunity do you have to use the phone without him there?

Ppl have limbs remove .they won't sed a nurse our for someone who just had a kidney our there's really sick ppl out there

Maggie I have a phone I'm typing on now. But he's pottering around.

Don mean to be rude but he's just hanging around like a bad smell can be abit over bearing

Sweet you are really sick. You're in a huge amount of pain. You are deserving of help.

It's not just a medical decision - your social circumstances also dictate the level of aftercare you need.

Is there a time (maybe in the morning) when he will be out for a while?