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Friend, flatmate and mixed doubles partner mess!

1 reply

LooksAreDeuceiving · 10/06/2015 01:00

Hello, I was looking for a place to write this all down and get it straight in my head and see who (if anybody) is BU in this case, but think that relationships is probably safer than AIBU!*

So, my main group of friends are from a tennis club. We all see a lot of each other, because between practice sessions, coaching, matches and the odd social there's something almost every night you can go to.

I joined about five years ago, and quickly became good friends with Henry. We never played together, except for fun, but got on very well and he knew everybody at the club, so introduced me to lots of people and basically taught me my way around.

Victoria joined at the same time as me, but I didn't really know her that well at first - we mainly did different nights. After a couple of years we saw more of each other and became quite friendly, and when her flatmate moved out, and I was looking for somewhere to live she suggested I flatshare with her. That's all been going very well, and works very nicely.

Victoria and Henry have never been that good friends, they get on ok but she thinks he's arrogant, and he thinks she can be bossy and difficult. I like them both very much, so don't get involved!

Henry used to play mixed doubles with his girlfriend, but they split up a couple of months ago after she moved to another country last summer and they couldn't make long distance work. He's been quite upset about it, and has been throwing himself into the club. Anyway, he's fed up of not having a partner and asked Victoria to try out with him (he's good so she jumped at the chance to play with him, even though they aren't that good friends). They've had some lessons together and have been practising hard and it seems to be working well.

Anyway, now I come to the bit where it's become a bit of a mess. We had a few people around to our flat at the weekend for dinner and drinks and a film. It got quite late and ended up with just me, Victoria, Henry and another friend, and we decided to watch a second film. I was sharing a sofa with Henry and he put his arm around me while we were watching, so we ended up cuddled up with my head on his chest.

Victoria wasn't happy about this, but said she doesn't want to talk about it. She's now acting completely normally (although we haven't all seen each other at the same time yet...).

I'm not quite sure what I did wrong though - he was the one who put his arm around me, and besides he's still quite cut up about breaking up with his girlfriend. He's quite a tactile person anyway, and if he's a bit tired, has had a few drinks and wants a hug I'm fine with it.

It isn't like he's suddenly going to ask me to play with him instead of her! And if anything, I should be the jealous one, since he was my friend first (childish as that sounds)!

Should I just ignore it and hope it was a result of the wine and that it never gets mentioned again? I know it sounds a bit daft, but I'm such good friends with both of them that I don't want anything bad to happen to either friendship Sad

*Names and some details have been changed so it isn't too identifying.

IonaMumsnet · 10/06/2015 20:44

Evening all, just popping by to remind folk of our rules on trollhunting. The OP has indeed been here a number of years and we've no reason to think she's not genuine, so please do pop the troll nets back in the shed. Thanks!

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