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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Entitled men/women. Have you any corkers? I have plenty of examples :-)))

186 replies

Rjae · 04/05/2015 18:01

Pretty lighthearted thread to laugh at some of the crap we have to put up with from the master race. It's nice to know I'm not alone!

H used to complain if I served up his dinner too hot, as in 'and now I've burnt my mouth'. he wouldn't dare say this now, he'd be wearing it

Or 'I was trying to have a shower but it was cold, didn't you hear me calling (no, I was outside) ...why is it cold....the washing machine and dishwasher are going, ....but I was going to have a shower.... I'll try to brush up on my mind reading skills and in the meantime check your fecking self Angry

I could go on of course, but give me your absurdity to laugh at please Grin

OP posts:
elephantoverthehill · 04/05/2015 23:46

XH. I was on the phone talking to his mother and relayed a question. His reply 'I can't answer questions ffs. I am making a roux'

XP 'I am going to town' Me 'Oh what do you need?' XP 'Just going to waste some time' 3 DCs both us with full time jobs and a house that needed renovating.

notsurewot2do32 · 04/05/2015 23:47

My exdp(lesbian relationship) after a two and a half year EA relationship dumped me then kept all of my stuff. All of my clothes, cds, books, dvds, furniture...I had a 200 pound portrait of siouxsie sioux that was so cool which she kept too. I guess it was unreasonable of me to ask for all my stuff back. Confused Sometimes though, you have to just never look back.

notsurewot2do32 · 04/05/2015 23:48

Christ on a bike confusedNC. What a selfish prick!

SteamTrainsRealAleandOpenFires · 04/05/2015 23:55

Eggs on Confused Wink

Clueing4looks · 04/05/2015 23:59

Arriving home on the night I gave birth to our DS, my (now ex) partner decided that he would be sleeping in our 1yo DD's room, and that she would have to sleep in our bed with me, because he was really tired.

TheySayIamparanoid · 05/05/2015 00:12

When I told my ex I wanted to get a small tattoo he told me I wasn't allowed and gave me many reasons why..
When I got it anyway and showed him he didn't believe it was real!
I asked, "did you think I'd just bow to your superior opinion??"
He said yes!

SteamTrainsRealAleandOpenFires · 05/05/2015 00:16

My brother, when visiting in the past and I've asked if he would like a tea or coffee has walked out, "due to the tone of my voice" wtf?.

Been NC for about 2/3 years now, no skin of my nose.

INickedAName · 05/05/2015 00:24

An old friend used to ask me to order stuff on ebay, she would look on her pc at home, then text me to order stuff, she would get pissy and angry if I was away from PC and couldn't place bids for, one time I got 20 texts in 15 mins telling me to hurry up, she would often order the wrong size, and would get annoyed when I asked for the money to cover the return postage, or for the £6 bus fare for me to go pay the money into my bank to cover her purchases. I don't know why I went along with it for so long, in the end I told her I'd set her up her own ebay account, she can bid herself and wait in all day for her own parcels, she didn't want to do that as she's worried about her bank account being hacked into, and I ruined her wedding as she couldn't buy her dress from ebay because of my unreasonableness.

Justatoe · 05/05/2015 05:32

I can only remember a couple but there must be loads

Ex used to fall asleep in front of telly (usually Sky Sports). We would turn over when sure he was fast asleep to watch something we liked. He would always wake up complaining he wasn't asleep and how dare we turn over!

Took showers at random times of the day so he moaned when I put washing on that he was just planning to have shower. Stopped doing washing & it became his job.

LocalEditorEssex · 05/05/2015 06:24

Back in 2001 I gave birth to ds3, 8 weeks premature on Xmas day at 1am.
He went straight to special care and I left hospital at about 5am to go home to spend Xmas day with my other two sons.
Ex husband threw the biggest strop ever, ranting and raving at me because I said no I wasn't going to cook a whole Xmas dinner. I was tired and had just had a baby who I had to leave behind in hospital. He shouted at me so much about how it was Xmas day and he wanted a Xmas dinner.
As it was I had already accompanied him on a two hour car journey to pick up his daughter from her mums. (Because he wanted me to go with him)
Her mum even said I should have been at home getting some rest and sleeping.
It was a shit marriage to be fair Hmm Grin

Duckdeamon · 05/05/2015 06:43

Lots of awful, abusive stuff here, especially about sex. Angry

OP I think you were unreasonable about the appliances and cold shower, unless your ex was taking showers at odd times, in which case fair enough!

Handywoman · 05/05/2015 06:49

These are brilliant and hilarious! Just a shame they are all true

ememem84 · 05/05/2015 06:57

Another laundry one. Dh this morning moaned because all his work shirts are either wet in washing machine, or in laundry basket.

Despite him saying a million times yesterday "leave then I'll do it" apparently it meant "it's your job. You're the wife. Do my laundry". This is not the first time he's had to wear a wet or dirty shirt to work.

But obvs it's my fault.

TrulyTurtles · 05/05/2015 07:02

A bonkers parent for you. Our school got new uniform. Bonkers parent phoned head to say pfb would need an alternative as the colour of the new jumper didn't suit her.

elQuintoConyo · 05/05/2015 07:06

I was in my first trimestre (early, hadn't made it public knowledge, very tired and vomity), DMil had sadly just died and my DF was visiting, it was Easter. I explained points 2&3 to a 'friend' who was begging me to babysit her two dc all through the holiday. Her response:

Well.... you can bring your dad, too.

It was the last in a short line of princess demands and I deleted her from my life. Haven't seen her in four years and w live in the same small town. Most people have gone nc with her, funny that.

fhdl34 · 05/05/2015 07:13

My DB and SIL cleaned my dad's house once and then thought he should sell it at £40k below the asking price because they had generated that particular offer by cleaning it (once) and they wanted some of the money for a house deposit (despite having £60k of their own money in the bank specifically for - what was that again? Oh yes, buying their own house!). They live in one of the cheapest cities in the country.

FernGullysWoollyPully · 05/05/2015 07:21

My DH and I were fairly new into our relationship, I had 3dc and cooked everyday for them. One day, I asked if he would like some dinner. He said "no way, your cooking might poison me" I didn't cook for him for 2 and a half years.

My mum can be very entitled. She cried at our wedding because she didn't have a husband and said the whole day had made her feel lonely and sad because she'd been pushed into the background. What do you expect?! I'm the bride, not you!

afink · 05/05/2015 07:38

A boyfriend I had in my early 20s (not living together) told me to write down a list of everything I spent money on (down to a packet of chewing gum) and how much each item cost so that he could go through it every week to suggest cutbacks. It is worth mentioning that I had no money problens at all, and nor was I spending excessive amounts. In fact, I was very careful with money. Er, NO.

BeaufortBelle · 05/05/2015 07:57

Thing is my DH does lots of the above (likes his socks paired a certain way, his hankies and pants ironed, hangers pointing inwards in the wardrobe, choice of shirts, used to eat the dc's packed lunch treats, likes lifts to golf because he doesn't like driving the big car, likes his dinner ready when he gets in and texts me when he 20 minutes away) but I just laugh and don't mind doing it for him.

Perhaps it's because he's generally a very nice man who is always kind.

teejayem · 05/05/2015 08:04

Have posted this before, six ish years ago tosser Ex moving out of our flat after vile. Vile breakup and into new place with OW, just before Xmas. called to say he wanted his 'half' of the furniture in our flat, and listed all the stuff he wanted to collect.
It was mostly cheap ikea stuff, but included 'his' bedside table 'his' armchair, two lampshades etc. plus some bigger stuff we'd both paid something towards.
I was very reasonable. Although pretty upset at the time, you don't buy this stuff ever thinking you'd be dividing it up. But I wanted to be fair, so I borrowed a circular saw from my dad and literally halved every poxy stick of furniture on the list. we loaded it into a van and pa helped me drop it round his new house. Sadly he wasn't in so we left it all in the front garden. Maybe not my finest moment but it made me feel a lot better at the time.

Betrayedbutsurvived · 05/05/2015 08:09

I could fill a thread with exh exploits.

Throw a huge strop because I was "taking the piss" asking him to wash up. I had both arms in plaster at the time.

I was a "lazy twat" for not cleaning the car once a week (on top of doing everything else in the house) because I rode in it.

Everytime I went shopping I was informed we didn't need much, just teabags, bread and jam, as he got a hot meal at work. Sod me and DD then!

Opened my credit card bill after we split because he wanted to see what I was spending "his" money on. I worked full time, and actually earned more than him.

Twat!

nousernamesleft · 05/05/2015 08:20

Exp was a twat, and I could fill this thread with his exploits, one that sticks in my mind though, I'd just got home from hospital after having dd1, who was very prem and in scbu. I'd had a crash c section, and they'd had complications, so I'd ended up with a huge cut, infections, the lot.
My dm collected me from hospital and, when I walked in the door, exp started shouting at me that I hadn't gone shopping in days, and there was nothing for his lunch before he went to work.
Being young, stupid, and feeling delicate, I apologised, and hobbled to the shop to buy him a pie. Angry

AlistairSim · 05/05/2015 08:20

I have an exbf who had a huge mantrum when I said I was getting a dog. Culminated in him declaring all dog owners to be control-freak Nazis.

I dumped him that night and picked up the dog the following week.

LadyFuckrington · 05/05/2015 08:27

ExH used to stand over me while i ironed his t shirts and tell me they were all wrong.

Picked me up from the hospital after major surgery and made me walk round town with him because he needed a new pair of jeans.

Took all the money out of my account because he asked if 'we' had any spare money and I said no. He took my bank card, saw there was a balance (to pay the month's bills!) so decided I was a liar and cleared the account.

Redhead11 · 05/05/2015 08:45

XH was so used to having everything done for him on the rigs, that he expected to pretty much get the same service at home. leaving clothes lying on the floor was apparently a sign they were to be washed. He once put a t-shirt, shirt and sweatshirt into the laundry basket (shock horror - he did know where it was) all inside each other. So i washed them like that and handed them back to him like that. He was incensed.

If i was watching the TV and an advert came on, he would appropriate the remote and change the channel and start watching something else and get shirty when i pointed out i was watching the other programme. 'But i'm watching this now'.

One famous occasion, i shouted to him to go down and collect DD1 from school. She was in P1. I had been superglued to the toilet for over half an hour and there was no way i could have made it. He couldn't see why he had to do it.

He was also very good at 'babysitting' his own children to 'give me a break', taking them into town to the cinema, paying for them to go in and then buggering off to the pub. I still don't know why i lived with him for so many years.

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