Could I possibly keep it?

[1stTimeForEverything]

Married for 15 years, 2 children. Pregnant with another man's baby. No future plans with him for the time being.
Anybody been in a similar situation?

Can you expand on the 'situation'? Do others know you are pregnant, for example?

CogitoErgoSometimes, no one knows. Very early days.

If I tell my husband his informed choice would be to break up (obviously). So I would be a single mother with 3 children.

Hold on - are you wondering about not telling him and passing the baby off as his?

No. That would be appalling.

Sadly, I don't think you have any good choices here so it's a question of choosing the least worst option. If having the baby (with the assumption that you're honest about the affair) means you end up a lone parent, that's one choice. Termination is the other.

Longtalljosie - yes, it would be appalling. The alternative would be to break the family, change the children's lives, possibly home address, schools, job, everything.
Or to have an abortion and forget it ever happened.

Longtalljosie I was thinking the same thing.

You cannot pass the baby off as your husbands.

You have difficulty choices to make but I suppose it's the price to pay for fucking someone behind your husband's back.

You need to decide if you want the baby or your husband. If you decide baby- you must tell him the truth. If your husband stays, you are very lucky. But you can't pretend the baby is his.

In your position I would have a termination. What do you want to do?

I'm assuming contraception failed? either way you should have ended the marriage before having sex with another man. Time to confess all and pay the price for your actions. feel sorry for your children

1stTimeForEverything You need to tell the truth.

If your husband would believe it was his, how do you know it isn't his? I'm not sure this adds up.

Don't women ever do that - passing the baby off as DH's?

I am not advocating it by any means and it terrifies me as, despite that affair, things are good with DH.

With regards to the OM, he has 2 children and is going through the divorce. We've known each other for 5 years but only got together last month and bingo. He does cares for me but was open about not ready to get into a relationship. He doesn't know about my PG.

How do you know which man is the father?

Please don't pass this child off as your DH's. Nobody deserves that, it's truly truly despicable.

I think you have two options:

1 - have an abortion, end the affair, get yourself and STD check and work on your marriage

2 - confess all to DH and let him decide what he wants to do.

Personally I think you need to fess up, your DH needs to know what a piece of work he's married to. You've put his health at risk.

MorrisZapp, with DH we use the withdrawal method for contraception and it never failed us. With OM the condom split. The timings match (I did the ClearBlue test which tells you the number of weeks since conception). So I am 99% sure it is his.

1stTimeForEverything No we don't ever do this, well not the women I know.

For you to pass the baby of as your DHs would be a really horrible thing to do, I can't actually believe you asked that question.

If I were you I would go for an abortion if you are sure that the baby isn't your DHs

HootyMcTooty, come on, put DH's health at risk? The OM is a married father of two, why would he have any STD?

First decision - do you want to keep the baby?

If you do, then you need to tell your DH and the OM. They both have the right to know if you go down this route, and they can then make their own decisions.

You can't be happy in your marriage if you have chosen to have sex with someone else, so why on earth are you considering staying with your DH? You must have little respect for him at all if you are contemplating passing off another man's child as your own.

Your poor husband. And yes you need to tell him. He needs sti testing too.

Are you 15?
Why didn't you take the morning after pill after a split condom?
Are you on self destruct trying to force yourself out of your marriage?

What I think you should do: end the pregnancy and tell your husband you are leaving him

What I might do: end the pregnancy and not tell my husband anything

You need to stop having an affair, and you need to grow up with regards to contraception, if you didn't take the MAP / get a coil.

You know you have to take two weeks off those tests dont you? ie three weeks is actually one since conception?