Strange Porn Habits- WWYD?

[CerealDater]

NC for this thread as lots of colleagues on here.

Context: I met a lovely bloke in September 2014 and we started seeing each other. We were both clear that we were having fun- great sex, brilliant days out, nice dates, just a really good laugh. If it turned into something more then fine but if not, then we'd let it run its course. Bottom line: he's not my DP, I don't love him, I'm not terribly emotionally attached. I've known since we met that he likes porn and I have no problem with this at all.

Yesterday: Last night I was round his place for tea. I needed to book a train ticket for today and he said I could do it on his laptop. I was completely freaked out by his search history that came up when I searched for a few things. There was the usual guff of "black girls big tits" "blonde massive tits" "spanked booties" etc etc. Fine. But there was also some really weird stuff that he'd searched for like "pictures of used tampons" "pictures of sex during period" "vomit porn".

I should say that there was nothing illegal on the searches. I'm just a bit freaked out and not sure what to do. On the one hand, our sex is just completely normal and if I hadn't found the searches then I'd be none the wiser so I should just carry on. On the other hand, you can't unknow stuff and this has just made me question whether he's a bit perverted and could escalate our sex to start requesting weird stuff...

But, I've always maintained that I'm fine with him watching porn so it seems a bit rich for me to now say that I'm not happy with the particular kind of porn IYSWIM.

WWYD?!

HTML fail.

Resisting urge to google should have been.

It could be that he was looking for a laugh, or just curiosity.

What's more telling about your relationship is that you were going through his internet search history so early on in the relationship. Do you have trust issues? What were you hoping to find?

I've googled some weird shit in the past e.g 2 girls 1 cup, doesn't mean I'm into eating shit though. He might have just let curiosity get the better of him after finding a link/reference to it.

I wouldn't even be able to have a conversation with him again, never mind sex.

Seriously, I know it's all 'legal' and that but so is an adult wearing a nappy.

I'd exit and never return.

I would say I'm gonna vomit but now I'm scared that seems a bit, erotic. Seriously ?

Btw. Adult wearing a nappy for kicks. Not legit reasons

Hooty I wasn't trawling his search history. I don't have trust issues because we're not in a relationship- if he shags someone else well, meh.

You know when Google populates your search for you well I was searching for lots of stuff (had to travel half way across the country today on public transport to a tiny village so was googling various buses and trains and maps and places) and it brought up some of what he had been searching for.

Just thinking about vomit porn makes me want to puke.

Don't infer too much from this! He might just be curious to see what things look like!

I think it was probably curiousity. Even if it wasn't, it wouldn't bother me too much. I think people have some pretty weird, or even abhorrent fantasies and these are not necessarily connected in any way to things they actually want to do in real life.
Also, I have googled some pretty weird things in my time, mostly not due to some kind of sick fetish but after seeing them talked about on mumsnet

Quite often in relationships couples don't entirely agree on what they do and don't like. They simply focus on the things they both like.

If it grosses you out that much end it.

Felicitygubbins, this also made me think of 2 girls 1 cup. I know plenty of people who've looked that one up just out of curiosity (not myself I might add, I've heard enough about it to know it would make me barf).

"Don't infer too much from this! He might just be curious to see what things look like!"

Exactly.
I agree with the other posters who've said this.
I googled 2 girls 1 cup years ago because so many people were talking about it all the time.
Did I get off on it, or is it what I'm into? Certainly not.
Often a friend (or someone on a forum) will say 'have you seen'? And it's off to google.
Doesn't mean anything really.

Sassy, call it what you like, most porn online is abusive, especially the heavy duty stuff like vomit porn, not going to argue the toss over it with you, I don't agree with it, find it extremely distasteful and offensive but then I wouldn't be googling to look at that kind of shit.

Really don't think you can judge from the fact that he searched it. God knows I've searched some weird shit, just on a whim to see what comes up, and we all know that there is some crazy porn out there. I'd be surprised if someone who uses porn hadn't searched the more extreme stuff at least once, just to see. Like you say, it's nothing illegal, and it's also not as degrading as some searches, IMO.

If it was ALL vomit porn, or he was starting to bring it into your sex life, then it'd be time for a conversation about whether you're well matched sexually!

If it were me I'd bring it up with him as a bit of a joke, like sorry, I saw your search history and you googled vomit porn... anything you want to request? See what he says. I'm pretty sure he'll blush and be like 'ohh yeaaah... that was a gross moment'

You are perfectly entitled to find some topics acceptable up to a point.

As someone upthread mentioned, you might find it okay that someone loves music, but not that the music they mean is full of racist of misogynistic language.

You might be okay with someone having more conservative views on immigration than you do, but not be okay that they are a member of the BNP.

You might be okay with people drinking and getting drunk, but not that your partner gets absolutely fucking plastered every single weekend.

Please don't let anyone tell you that there are absolutely no shades of grey, and that you have to accept everything just because it's legal.

At the end of the day, he is entitled to his disgusting (and racist by the way) porn preferences. You are entitled not to want to continue to be with him due to them.

Why are you even hesitating about this out of interest? It's a casual relationship and you mention you don't have strong feelings for him. Just tell him you think the relationship has run its course and you would like to end things.

Jan, if people enjoy vomiting and being vomited on, and being filmed doing so for other likeminded puke enthusiasts, who is being abused ?

Let's get this right. You're OK with his viewing porn. He said you could use his laptop. You then went through his search history and didn't like what you found.

TBH it's him that should be pissed off by your snooping IMO.

The thought that came to me is that this might/would be what happens when a man does not out grow eight year old boy potty humor.

Cereal , at the end of the day, you know what makes you uncomfortable...keep your boundaries (and your self respect) and stay honest about it-honest with yourself. You do not need a man's permission to end the relationship. You are not required to give a reason for ending a relationship. You do not need to offer proof or a judged dissertation in hopes of receiving co-operative (or even cooperative) agreement to your decision.

You have nothing to feel guilty about for saying you are ok with porn, but not that porn. Or even if you decided to change your mind about porn altogether. You do not owe him anything...Perhaps common civility to let him know it is over. But even if you just tapered off and drifted away, that would be ok (what I would probably do).

It's fetish porn. Some people are into it, some people aren't. Some people like licking feet, some people like to be peed/crapped on, some people dream about humping a cow. People's secret desires and fantasies come in all types of weird and wonderful packages.

OP I completely get that this has been a turn off. I think we all like a bit of kink/spice now and then, but we also know our personal boundaries. Vomit/period porn would turn a lot of people off, tbh. It would have certainly icked me out a bit. You either get past it or you don't and go from there. Good luck!

It's disgraceful. This is the 21st century.

How do you put up with this?

I can't believe you are dating a man who isn't capable of deleting his internet search history, clearing out his Cache and resetting his Cookies...

Just like others have said upthread, I would say that nearly all of my 'extreme Googling' has been as a result of things I've read on Mumsnet! Do the dates on the searches reveal whether it's habit or just curiosity?

I saw a documentary once about people who have sex with inanimate objects (including cars, buildings and bridges!). I Googled that quite a bit out of pure fascination. I am definitely not into shagging said objects, or getting off on looking at it.

Men will mostly watch any porn. I know lads who have watched disabled porn - just because they could!

My first reaction was that I would be really disgusted to find this on my DH's computer, but then I thought a bit about some of my own more disgusting searches mostly inspired by here . Dragon butter, blue waffle, etc - (warning, all disgusting googles!).

Plus there are the 'sporn' threads and pictures, which yes I enjoy and have absolutely no idea why. Actually I'm really questioning this about myself now, why the hell am I looking up youtube videos of 'zit-squeezing'?

But yeah, I wonder if its just a compulsion to look at something gross?

"Perhaps he has a sick sense of humour and was looking for pictures to gross out a friend."

Yeah it could just be this; a lot of people seem to like sending each other gross pictures by phone. There used to be (probably still is) a website that had photos of dead car crash victims and stuff like that which people would then post on forums/forward on to mates.

"I saw a documentary once about people who have sex with inanimate objects"

I remember once reading about a man who liked to have sex with paving stones; the spaces between them.