Positive Self Talk- care to try?

[grumpasaur]

Hello all!

I have no idea how to link to my other thread as I use MN on my mobile, but in short, I sought advice about how to reverse worrying behaviours I was seeing in myself around criticism of my self and others, obsessing over having a spotless show home, and generally feeling snippy and bitter.

Was given really good advice- one of which was to start forcing myself to practice positive rather than negative self talk.

So I start now. Every night for the next month I will come on and write down three things I am proud of- either daily accomplishments or longer term things.

Please do the same!

I am not brilliant at checking regularly, but will be on every evening at some point to add my three things (and read yours).

Anyone welcome!!

Thanks grumpasaur. I felt the positivity of this thread all day. You did a nice thing in starting it.

curtwild I love shuffling through piles of leaves. I'm going to make time for that tomorrow. Don't think my two are too old for that yet.

My three from today:

1. Didn't rise to dd again. Just listened and hugged. I think it's all pre-puberty hormones bless her, but boy she is challenging. Hopefully it'll pass soon.
2. Did masses of cleaning. House and windows all sparkly now. Even got washing out on the line.
3. Didn't have sweets/coke/popcorn at the cinema, and still enjoyed the film.

Strong thoughts people.

I like this thread. It's nice to go to bed with positives in my head.

1. Changed dd's bed sheets - you don't want to know how long it's been.
2. Organised uniforms, pack lunches and dinner for tomorrow.
3. Managed not to completely bite DH's head off when he referred to my singing as grating. (I am holding a grudge however, my singing is not that bad and I don't feel his apology was sufficient) I didn't let it ruin our lunch out.

1 Started a huge household reshuffle with an achievable end in sight
2a dedicated a good chunk of time to the Melody Beattie book Codependent No More
2b ?? resisted sending toxic ex a happy birthday message
3 took myself for a lovely river walk instead of lazing around in bed until the children came home

Strong thoughts indeed! Wish we went leaf jumping today - still it's half term so will fit it in some where this week

1. excellent homemade roast today - I could have picked holes in it, but the family were so complimentary, that I just smiled & said Thank you!
2. generally nice family day - minimal arguing from DC
3. long soak in the bath this evening

felix my DD went through something similar not so long ago, everything changed when I hugged more and shouted less
nottalotta hope the talk went as you hoped

Hi all,

These are all great as usual, and I'm pleased to say I'm having trouble responding to everyone individually...but I've read them all.

Felix- thanks for your nice words! It's definitely helping me already.

Notta- please come on and let us know how today went, when you have time. If you didn't manage to go through with it yet, no worries...there will still be a positive there somewhere!

Alongcamespiders- hooray for lovely river walks! They are so beautiful. This really is the best time of year to be outdoors (for me, anyway).

Scottishmum- I'm sure your singing is like little dove cries... :)

So my three for today are:

1. Finally got back on the mat (yoga) after a six month hiatus from yoga in general, and a much longer hiatus from my normal style of practice.

2. Really pushed myself to praise myself for getting back on the mat rather than beating myself up for allowing myself to get so out of practice. This was only partially successful, but for the first time, I really tried.

3. Didn't apply for a job today that I wanted to...instead planned to actually take some well-earned TOIL this week, and do it then. So enjoyed a day with DH and just my own company.

Just about to turn in after a lovely relaxing evening but just wanted to check in to read all your positives. Really nice note to end the day on

I like this.

1. I baked cakes today, with my daughter like we used to
2. I haven't worked all weekend!
3. I have recently made brave decisions about our future, all one own.

Hello Noregrets78.

Welcome!

Cake baking sounds lovely. Please send extras my way!

See you all tomorrow.

Morning all, didn't update yesterday, sorry. I was going to say I had 'failed' to have the talk but in light of our newfound positivity, I will say I was thwarted. Planned to have it when I got in from a mornings horsey stuff, arrived home to find FIL there. All day.....

So, yesterday three are:

1. Rode the horse again! (i know i had this Saturday but it is something

I'm so pleased with)

Oops...
2) Started the declutter - my clothes and shoes. Very therapeutic and long overdue
3) Back on the diet! Did well all weekend.

Grump - can you give me any tips on how to start with yoga at home? And dvds that are good?

And todays are all related. I have spent too long being unhappy with my weight. I have 1.5st to lose to feel happy with myself. I eat too much and drink too much.

1)day three of eating healthily - most of all proud that I managed it at work!

2. Drank 1.5litres of water. Can go all day drinking tea or coffee normally.

3. Have not bought wine for tonight.

I am determined!

Today I am proud of:

1. finishing the clear out of my loft
2. completing a tough bit of work that I'd been putting off
3. not rising to the bait when getting a torrent of mind games from XH, and being told I'm clearly having a breakdown!

Already planning what things to do tomorrow to be proud of

1. Worked hard to ensure patients were seen this morning, as I had a meeting this afternoon.
2. Took DD1 to youth club party, although it was the last thing I felt like doing. She enjoyed herself.
3. Took time to talk to my husband about a work situation he is going through.

I'm not quite there, but wanted to keep the thread going as I think it's the Bees knees!

Notta - well done btw. I'm hoping my positives will be about healthy living in the near future!

May I join in please?

1. Phoned up and got on the case of a hospital referral appointment I was promised at an appointment 3 months ago but haven't heard anything about since.
2. In process of writing letter to consultant to tell him why I strongly disagree with his opinions, following on from 1 above.
3. Challenged a woman I know this evening who called over to me on the high street " hi PP". Not in itself an insult, but she is acting as a witness in Court against me, when she told me after I asked if she could be a witness for me that she didn't see anything and couldn't help. fine it's her choice what she does, but don't come over all bloody chummy and acting like my BFF in public when others are watching just so they don't realise how two faced she is.

Three things that I've done something about today rather than keeping on brooding over and getting more and more wound up

Great thread Grump

Mine are

1. Had a great day visiting my sister and her 3 kids, my ds had an absolute ball, he alternated between jumping on the trampoline and playing on the play station.

2. had a great catch up and quality time with my sister.

3. I did not shout at all, not even once AND I put ds in his pjs before leaving so when he fell asleep in the car, I was able to just scoop him up and put him straight in his bed. No bedtime battle, bliss!

Oh, I'd like to join

1. managed to stop being uber grumpy and took two youngest DCs swimming, didn't yell at them in the changing room either!
2. didn't start argument with DH ... 3)got self together and looked at my online banking

New people - hello!!

1. sat outside in garden with a cup of tea watching DC play
2. sunshine & blue skies - a beautiful autumnal day
3. having the energy to walk to the park

Didn't have time to post last night as....

1.booked part of our holiday for next year! Yay! We had this holiday planned for the last 2 years but didn't make it. It's fairly complicated (think dumbed down backpacking around Europe), so needs time and concentration to bring it all together. Anyway, now the return flights are booked, so we have to go!

My others from yesterday:

1. I cooked a roast dinner and everyone ate it. This was due to me allowing copious amounts of grated cheese and ketchup for dc's to 'make theirs nice'. Dh and I had posh gravy. It was a nice mealtime.
2. Dd and I went leaf jumping!

Well done everyone else, it's lovely to read all your posts.

Hi all, so sorry that I didn't come on last night- fell asleep on the sofa after a 14 hour day at work!

Notta- don't worry- you'll do it when the time is right.

In answer to your question about yoga, I would say that if you've never done any yoga before, it's probably best to go to a beginners class somewhere, where someone can guide you and make sure you're safe. It's also really easy to think you are doing something right when in fact you aren't, which can a) be dangerous for your body, and b) set up really bad habits that are hard to break.

There are also loads of different forms of yoga. I'd perhaps find a basic hatha beginner's class to go to, and build up from there.

Sorry- posted too soon- also great news about the healthy eating! Good luck!

Noregrets, those are all great! Number three is a bit of a worry, so definitely make sure he doesn't win!

Scottish mum- excellent! Well done!

Lacoba- gentle push- you can DEFINITELY find three things by tonight. Even if you think they are ridiculous, we won't. Coming on here is already number one :)

Posh Penny- Welcome! Your three are great- though sounds like two difficult situations...definitely seek some support if needed.

Shaky- HELLO! Welcome! Great to see you on a more positive thread :). I like your number three, it sounds very sweet.

Camtt- Welcome to you too! Swimming sounds lush. Banking sounds scary, but it's so important, so well done!

Plus3- Could not agree more about number 2 :).

Felix- Super exciting!!! Where are you going?