The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Kicking The Wicked Wine Witch Where It Hurts! Mwahahahahahahaha!

[Mouseface]

Hey, I'm Mouse, welcome to the Bus (aka Gerald!)

We're a mixed bunch of folk, some have been here for a while, and of course we have some new additions too. It matters not one jot how long you travel with us, as long as you get something from it.

No matter your story, your needs, your fears and hopes, you CAN come on here and talk. You can cry, scream, rant, let it all out and not be judged for anything. Ever.

We've all been so very low, some have hit the very bottom of the rock, rubbed the bruising better and picked ourselves back up again but sometimes, you need a helping hand or someone to listen too.....which is why we're here, sharing our experiences, or just reading each other's and nodding as we click along.....

The support here is unconditional. :)

There are two banners down each side of Gerald, our super duper Bus saying -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

We have lots of food on board, but mainly Opal fruits!!! They tend to be anything other than green, as they get snapped up vair fast indeed!

If you would like to know a bit more about how we got to where we are today, you can read these threads.

THE PREVIOUS THREAD

THE START OF THE JOURNEY

Hope to see you soon :) x

Well so far new boyfriend hasn't put a foot wrong. Brought me a bottle of wine, talked football with dh and is now playing on the Xbox with Ds.
You're doing well, boy!

Lol Ma :)

ma I remember beseeching my mam and dad to be on their best behaviour when I invited anyone round. Mam I never ever had to worry about, she is a good cook and though fairly quiet would never make anyone feel uncomfortable in her home.

My dad would either give them the third degree or come rolling in worse for wear with his rugby pals. The conversation would then take on a rather ribald tone which of course my young beaux thought cool/amazing etc. Cue young 'un joining in ribaldry thinking he was it. Mam and I would be seething quietly.

He sounds like a good loon ma. Fitting in with my family would have been the death knell for any relationship I had when I was younger. Would have not liked them for being an arse either.

Had I known a few years down the line the queues would dwindle somewhat I wouldn't have been quite such a wee picky-pants.

70 well done for haudin gaun, it is difficult, but look at your sparkling clean house! I've just been to the park with Little and it's the second weekend I've not had to do the sneak down to the bottle bank en route. Little doesn't like the crashing at the bottle bank. You can see it whirring round in her little hairy heid, nobody else's dog is stood there for quite so long....

venus Feeling very free. Booked 2 horse trials off for next year, and a lochside cottage for a long weekend. Off to Yorkshire to visit a pal in February. Lots of things to look forward to. I plan to visit the Mulberry outlet shop with my wine piggy bank. Scary how quick it mounts up...

soc hope you're okay and enjoying your weekend, no doubt you are running here and there, all fit and sheeny, looking like the best AF advert ever. that's my next target, be a good bit fitter.

Columbo on shortly, big pile of chickeny, veggie loveliness wi buttery mash for tea, courtesy of lovely pal. I am very spoilt.

That went well. Boy ate all his dinner, helped do the dishes, danced with dd in his arms in the kitchen( lump in throat) and thanked me for the day saying he had had a lovely time.
Where does it all go wrong though?When does all that die and they become like me and thousands of other careworn resentful wives, feeling lonely and bitter and unloved?

Day 9. It was harder today, as I'd usually have something at the weekend. Stay strong babes

wry I am trying to crochet cushion covers (as Christmas presents) I do not do fine crochet - my eyes wouldn't be able to see the stitches. I use a huge hook and chunky yarn. Unfortunately, am not making good progress: I had only done half of one side of one cushion, but it was all going wrong so it had to be pulled out and started again.

DH says if I don't get them finished in time, I should wrap up the yarn and hook, and say its a crochet kit

Aww ma it doesn't always die you know (I've seen the films, sometimes Matt Damon turns up, and it's happy ever after.)

Ya think joey? Really?
I want her to be happy and he quite clearly adores her......but part of me wants her to just run. I mustn't inflict my negativity on them. They are young. They still believe.

I've no idea ma I was just trying to stay positive

I used my stalker credentials to track down my friends new whirlwind romancer (so they met on a train to Edinburgh, and by the time they reach Perth, they've agreed to move in together he's also convinced her to get rid of her beloved cats... Just to remind you - they met SIX WEEKS ago... Is this love or is it madness

I'm sceptical.. I've found him online and he's no oil painting, but he doesn't appear to be married or dodgy. I'm expecting to hear that she's pregnant with twins any day. I want to believe in the fairytale too.

Sorry joey. Didn't mean my post to sound sarcastic. That's the bloody problem with posts with no inflection! I was hoping that's what you really thought. That it could be true. I hope so. For all the star crossed lovers and whirlwind romancers and cyber stalkers amongst us
I have just finished reading Anita Shreve's "The Lives of Stella Bain". Really enjoyed it.Recommend it, but have tissues to hand for some bits!

ma the answer is - you maun kick his hairy little arse every time he shows WB tendencies. Or let nature take it's course and hope beyond hope that she ends up with one of the good guys. He sounds like he's a Good Guy. I believe.

joey at crochet kits! Get some of the niftier loom banders onto the case, they'll soon be rattling them out at a rate of knots! Why do small kids pick up stuff so much quicker?

I'm off to London by train in 3 weeks. That's twice the distance. What the hairy baws could I agree to by the time I get there? I'm going to end up in a harem or something aren't I?

Wry. Lol -

Ma. Me and hubby ok - not stuff made of films - but ok.
Joey well done on day 9 and crocheting - I have found this weekend damn hard - just here by skin of teeth
Day 15 - hoping I get stronger and voice gets quieter !!!!!

ma it's okay, I didn't read it as sarcastic!

wry Aberdeen to London eh? Recent trends show you could have a ring on your finger by Newcastle. I hope you travel first class.

Was Guy Martin the guy who was cycling? DH was watching that. He was shoving talc down his shorts (Guy, not DH) and I thought hmm, he should use Lanacane on that, get somebody to rub it in all the cracks... Is it a chaffed willy? or chafed? (suspect a chaffed willy means something else entirely ... )

Hi Babes,

Hope you are all well! Not been around as I am a little unwell at the moment. I have read all your posts over the last week or so but my brain is such a fog at the mo that no sooner have I read them, I can't remember who said what.

Today will be day 10 again AF. Not sure this really counts though as I have no inclination to drink as I feel so crap.

Well done Wry for getting rid. You deserve so much better. You go girl!!

Thinking of you all. x

So, I've been away for a few days, no mobile reception and haven't even been able to read.

Came back and I opened the last page and see lots of news...... the news from ma about how well things are going with the new boyfriend - dancing in the kitchen, boy doing good "Gosh" I think, "things have moved on quickly since he was a passionate glimmer in her eye". Then I read that said 'new boyfriend' has been at her house and met the family - well this has been a rapid development (thinks I), and then a confusing sentance about his discussion with ma's dh . I look back to previous pages and have a sudden realisation that this is ma's dd's boyfriend. Ahh - well, we can all dream huh?

wry good to hear about your plans, keep moving on without him. The loss of him from your life is really very small. Keep his smallness in perspective Until you can ride again (ps - completely unrelated to the previous sentance) why don't you make a little 'horsey-box' - an old shoe box filed with hay, some leather, a cutting of old jodhpur etc. and the whenever your feel all horsey-nostalgic you can just open the box for a little sniff.....

isindie hi, I saw you post there briefly - you can't escape undetected.

And big waves and hugs to all babes

at Venus. I wish! Still just a passionate glimmer in the eye and a fading dream.
wry my goodness lots could happen on such a long train journey. Wear your best knickers just in case.

joey that train romance is astonishing. But worrying. I once had an 'eyes met across a crowded room' thing. My friend swore that she could feel actual electricity between us. And it was wonderful. Almost everything about it was wonderful. Ah..... almost

For us it was his ability to spend every penny he got 3 times over (and still believe he had a couple of quid left over for a luxury). It took a while to realise that this approach was completely incompatible with any kind of shared lifestyle, let alone one where I'd fought and wrangled to get money from exh for me and dc...... but I still think I'd smoulder if he walked into the room.... [phew] [puff] Sadly, it's not always meant to be... [wistful venus]

Hey 70, hope you made it through day 15, almost there lass. The voice will get quieter, you'll see. What have you been up to today?xx

joey hello quine, how is the crocheting kit coming along? Oh I'm definitely a first class girl. But it's one o those supersaver thingies. I don't know how I do it but when I travel standard I end up sitting next to fiddler's elbows. They could be reading a newspaper, raking in their bags, playing very jerky games on their ipads or horror of horrors...my worst one ever was a new knitter. Her elbows had been planed to maximum pointy. And the sound effects! Punctuated by sucky sighy noises. She chatted aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllll the way to Peterborough. I was trying and failing to read Wolf Hall. I got very very drunk. Blot. Blot. Blotblotblot.

You are right. Tis chafed. Fat fingers on BatPhone wrote chaffed. Guy Martin -> Chaff -> Hay -> Roll -> see where I'm going? I'm a dab hand at caring for sore bits Guy. Ye can bugger off wi your pee ridden tandem though mate. I bet it wis honkin in there. xx

faith are you okay darling? Missed you on here, well done on day 10, absolutely brilliant achievement! hope you feel better soon, xx

Hello you! Aww at the wistfulness. venus it all sounds scarily similar, awful when they're spendthrifty like that, always assuming someone somewhere will pick up the slack/shortfall. Then once you've got it sorted, off they go again. Wishing you sweet dreams of the electricity and smouldering without any of the shity bits. I am up to my ears in horse smell tonight, my friend brought round some nice sweaty tack for me to clean, I am in heaven.... Gnnneeeeeeegh, Gnnnnneeeeeeegh. Gnnneeeeeeeeeegh. xx

ma comfy knickers all the way on the train I'm afraid. And picking at my bum on the tube escalators is never classy. I'm prone to cheek creep thanks to my whopping great kardashianesque bahookie. Sloggi chics are the way forward. When I ride I wear padded gusset knickers. Now they would frighten the horses or any potential harem recruiters

How are you, lovely thing you? Here darling, have some hoss! Oh I wish you should smell my living room, tis bliss. xx

Busy hands my friend has given me. Just as well, temptation is great for some reason tonight. Think it's because I'm thinking about the CPD in London. And the train. I tend to get lathered on the train. I think I look all sophisticated all dressed up with my wine, pretending I'm this super confident being taking it all in her stride. Nup.

soc? At what point do you find your inner sober confidence? The non pretendy one? xx

Bosies to all, time for a cuppie and some cheese on toast wi a splooter of Lancashire sauce. Meeting my other pal tomorrow morning with her bairns, soft play skirls and soup. xx

Hi everyone,
Sorry I haven't read the whole thread. Have been on here before (very briefly, ages ago). Nc from midnight..because of a post I did that was a bit revealing. Anyway just here as a last resort again, having a panic attack. I didn't even drink that much today, it actually is now I think of it, but I just hate that I drank at all. I don't know why I do it. Everytime i drink (normally I start about 11am and drink all day) I wake up in the middle of the night with sweats and a racing heart, feeling sick, guilty, panicking, upset stomach, unable to sleep, clenched jaw, wanting to cry but being unable.
I don't know why I do it, always at this point I swear no more, never again, but always within a week I've done it again. I'd happily not drink, but when I get a few days after a binge life gets boring again and I think I'll just have one with a friend, and inevitably don't want to leave. Due to my circumstances I can get away with this at various points during the week, so there's nothing to stop me.
I think I do it to socialize, I'm so boring without a drink, literally no one likes me and I have no confidence or friends. When I'm not drinking I say weird stuff and get in a muddle, come across wrong. But when I drink people listen to me and I feel involved, funny and interesting.
I feel so Ill after a binge, the panic attacks are the worst, and I get stomach cramps for days after, I've got a beer belly, constant urine infections and diarrhea I just feel awful, I know most of these problems come from drinking, but I always go back.
A few months back my circumstances were different and I wasn't drinking as much, and never in the day, I felt fine. I didn't need it, granted I wasn't socializing much, but I didn't mind, I was concentrating on being a good mum! But now my circumstances have changed again, and I really need to ride the situation out for a few months, but it always leads me to drink too much.
I hate myself, I just want to be the drunk me all the time, but without the alcohol, and poising myself. I'm saying now that I won't drink for a week, but I know that's bullshit now, too many times I've said that and not stuck to it.
Sorry brave babes for clogging up yer thread. Its helped me distract myself from a panic attack for A while at least, I hope to be back when I recovers, but I bet I won't. Back to the same old cycle.
Take care.

Hi bigjim just wanted to say welcome. I'm not doing very well right now but I can see that you are in a lot of pain. This isn't really a last resort place more of a great place to start. I guess you do it because alcohol is a really addictive substance so in a sense it isn't YOU doing this,the addiction compells you to take another drink.

I'm desperately pulling through a tough patch in my life but I'm going to try for an af free evening,care to join me?

I think I am going to go back to aa. It drives me crazy,I think it's cult but when I filter the loonier elements out then it makes the difference between drinking and staying sober. I'm back to half a bottle a night which is when it begins to tip over. Right now I am psychologically dependent again and that is my line in the sand. I'm back to needing the booze to lift my mood,life is still shitty Mc Shitty BUT the booze does not help.

Small wave at the lovely babes and a wobbly climb back onto the bus.

Hi gorgeous Wry thanks for asking after me :). Day 16 here today - yay - feel like I've turned a bit of a corner - fingers crossed x

Guggs. You can do this - I know how strong you've been in the past - good luck for tonight. I can't do AA don't know why x

Ma. Your girls boyfriend sounds great - I hope my daughter picks as sensibly - who knows - she's a bit of a rebel !!!

Faith of course it counts - I still drank no matter how crap I felt x

bigjim welcome - don't think about a week - just get through each day - I know it's a cliche but it works - you can change - it will be hard - really hard - but better health and long term happiness will be worth it.

That's it for me - I am going to get up and go out for my morning walk - still haven't list weight - gah !!!!! Hoping this week I will loose a few pounds x

By the way anyone seen Mouse

hi 70

Sorry,it was unfair to describe aa a a cult- only some people take it to that extreme they just all live here most people are lovely. to say sorry

Hi guggs are the flowers for me - no need - I was agreeing with you.

Have just retread some old threads from me (under a different name) - any away some quotes for all

Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.

If you want something you'll find a way. If you don't you'll find an excuse.

just wanted to say welcome to bigjim. stick with us, even if you are still drinking. God knows, I do!
this thread wont make you instantly sober or teetotal but it will help you to get in a better place, wherever that is, and get you on the road to sober/teetotal if that's what you want.
In work so no time to name check -

Morning babes; it's been a while since I have been on the bus but am jumping back on today, day 2 for me.