The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Getting Ready For The Golden Sights Of Autumn In Search Of Sobriety.

[Mouseface]

Hello everyone, I'm Mouse :) and this is the Bus I've been on a while now!

It's filled with a variety of drinkers. Those that do, those that don't, and those who are desperate to STOP but hide it, or embrace it and get the help they NEED.

'Help' in whatever form works for them, your friend or you. Be it AA, a Local Community Alcohol Counselling Group, your GP, your family/friends, this thread or even a combination of all of the above!

You have to want to stop drinking more than wanting to breathe.

I know that right now, that may sound like a ridiculous goal.

They got sober, One Day At A Time then came here during the process to chat about it, discuss their feelings, but more than anything else, their experiences HELPED OTHERS TO BELIEVE that they too could get dry.

They might not get dry and stay dry, sometimes they'll be lying about their consumption, fooling themselves as well as others

BUT when the posters do get dry for good, come back and post to help others with their tricks of the trade or just to say 'I did it!!' my heart jumps for joy because that person, poster, Brave Babe has gone through hell and back, lived to tell the tale and now wants to share that with the rest of the Bus to see if one simple trick or technique will put them on the track to recovery, sobriety, to the life that they want to lead :)

There's two saying that have appeared to stick with us -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

We all have our own reasons for starting to drink 'too much', we all have an excuse don't we.... we all have a "but....."

Well, as I say to Nemo (who you will get to hear about ) - goats butt!

And for those of you who want to know a bit more -

HERE IS THE MOST RECENT THREAD

AND THIS IS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN, OVER FOUR YEARS AGO!!!

See you soon x

Hi lovely babes

On day 7 and feeling pretty good but have a real challenge coming up. My mum and her husband are coming to stay for a few weeks (next week) and this will be a huge trigger situation for me. They are both daily drinkers, my mum particularly believes we all deserve a naice glass of something. Additionally the rewriting of history , favouring of one son and constant comparing to friends children all put my stress levels through the roof. As I write this I realise how much I am projecting and getting uptight . Not drinking will help me control my responses and detach from the less than agreeable comments. I may need to vent a bit somewhere though so will settle in a seat near the back for the occasional sweary outburst!

Sorry not to name check, have been reading but so many posts and babes I don't know where to start . Instead I will send a little love and happy to you all xxx

Hi guys, mouse and guggs I wrote a massive post for both of you and lost it, actually burst out crying with frustration, took me ages? Will try again later when I've calmed, but essentially your both gonna be fine, I've went through where you both are now and it DOES getter better, I promise. I know this to be true.

Day 20 here.

Xxx

20 days baby that's great.
Waves to emopod and guggs and all the other babes.
Everyone full of colds and irritable here so just getting through the day

I've stocked up on chocolate and soft drinks and have planned some craft bits and bobs for this evening. Already have a book on the go.

emopod yes I have lost that urgent feeling (beginning to sound like a song again).I know my relationship with booze isn't normal but I like to 'forget' and see if anything changes. I know some of the problem is that I'm not going to go to aa anymore (stopped working for me) but haven't replaced it with anything in RL.

Well done beaches Stay for a few weeks??? With you???? Maybe practise meditation now so that you'll be at Zen levels by the time they arrive

'Lo there faire and just going to wave now.

Hadn't seen posts from baby and ma- lots of love to you both.

baby did you see a counsellor for advice? Did it help? would you recommend it? 20 days is amazing YAY- good news.

Day 7! Still got a cold, and the wine has been in the larder since last Sunday I've actually started thinking that I can leave wine off tomorrow's shop since there already is some in the house... But that feels wrong - like I should somehow 'catch up' (as if there is some sort of target to aim for. ie. must drink at least once a week )

beaches I also have one of those mothers! Try not to anticipate the worst. My tips: take the dog out on loooong walks - even in the pouring rain. Go to bed early with a "headache" and take mumsnet with you. Do a craft such as crochet - you can just half-listen to the conversation, with an occasional "Really?" Get a friend to phone you for a long chat about an invented crisis...

Hello everyone, short tale of woe, honest.

Blood clot. My third and worst. Never mind eh? Up and at 'em I say!

Back on meds. And back on the bus I have missed you all loads!

I'm on my phone so not ncing but I have been keeping up with you all, and sending tinterbosies.

Tonight I shall mostly be having Warfarin xx

Thank you for asking after me, I wis very touched, xx

Grrrrr, just lost a big post.

To sum up - thanks for the mother support joey and guggs. The perils of emigrating mean lots of hour long visits get merged into a marathon extended visit which tests us all! Will definitely be walking the dog and sloping off to bed early to keep things as amiable as possible though

joey 7 days is great, understand the feeling of being cheated out of a bona fida night's drinking though, that need to catch up - sounds nuts but I do get it!

Guggs I wasn't here when you first joined the bus so not sure what drove you to quit. You did through, for bloody ages. Perhaps things have altered but I do get the feeling that you are not comfortable with the amount you are drinking at the moment. Happy avoidance tonight babe!

Mouse keep posting sweetpea, it seems that you are gaining some strength just by being back on the bus. The fog will clear and you will get back that feeling of control again. Small steps x (or big strenuous Wii fit ones!)

emopod same day . Any chance of a roast beef food parcel, express delivery to Canada?

Ma a lotus flower napkin?! Your DS has a big fan here

baby day 20 whoop! Hope the nightmares are not driving you potty babe, you sound good and strong but exhaustion is so debilitating. Xx

Love to everyone else.

X post lovely Wry. Poor you, sounds like a real scare. Any medical knowledge fails me but glad you are over the worst and of course back on the bus. Sending lots of love xx

wry you OK hen? Thought you were away shaggin a stable hand or some such, not being poorly!
beaches yes, a lotus flower napkin. He has spent today baking brownies and scones. You can see why the school bullies zoomed in on him. Add rather plump and a propensity for warbling songs from musical theatre while he bakes and you can see why I worry for him in this hard world.

Brownies and scones?! I want him!

beaches Sure thing! I'm sure customs wouldn't object to that at all.

I also baked my first ever cookies! Chocolate-chip and hazelnut, if anyone wants some.

Hi all, wow baby 20 days thats great, I did similar to Guggs and went off hand in hand with the ww for a couple of weeks but today is day 6 in the eccles house, I am sipping sparkly water and watching X factor in a mn. wry sounds scary, are you ok? mouse you sound in a bad place right now but know that there are loads of us all wishing you well and sending hugs, it will pass and you will find the mouse you love you just are having a blip, understandable with all you are carrying... be kind to yourself

Am sober and cross- that episode of Dr Who was rubbish. Might have made more sense drunk. Humf!

wry you poor thing,are you ok?

beaches I was in a proper bad place when I first joined the bus,not just drink was,just everything was too much. I ought to be ashamed of myself, but i'm not for drinking again when I've worked hard and found out so much about how alcohol affects us.

eccles day 6 is great- nearly a full week. Do you feel good about it?
ma he sounds awesome, vast improvement on most teenage boys. Suspect you'll have a house full of girls before too much longer

Day 1 done.

Baby well done on 20 days chick! Amazing - you rock. Have you got the smock of smug on yet?

Beaches - when is the big visit? Good luck with it xxx

Wry - I am casting a spell to disperse your stupid blood clot. In the meantime look after yourself and huge, great big bosies to you (((t'interbosies))))

Ma your son sounds wonderful. My 14 year old is so useless he can't butter toast and if he empties the dishwasher he thinks it merits a round of applause. Even training him to move his empty plates off the table and towards the kitchen is an uphill struggle. I pity his poor wife one day (who will no doubt blame me) Your boy, on the other hand, will be in high demand in years to come. (PS do you want to swap?? You know, just for a week or so while I enjoy some scones.... DD would like him too please)

Guggs - yes, I was baffled a bit by Dr Who and have gone off Clara. She would have put up with his moon antics if he were young Matt Smith Dr Who, she is very shallow and ageist. And her soldier boyfriend is such a crap character, he only speaks in cliches! Was dying for the Doctor to let fire at both of them in Malcolm Tucker style and ban them from his Tardis forever.

Got to get ready to go to the Midlands now - 2.5 hour drive for a 20 minute relay race with ds. Yesterday was a busy one too, on a march for wildlife doing the craft stall and marshalling. It's a whirlwind at the moment but still finding time to drink

Not even phoned up about my blood tests. How were yours lovely Mouse?

Sobriety starts again tomorrow. Going to try to do a full week or two before half term kicks in...

Have a good Sunday all xxx

Hi, reckon I should call myself regular lurker. Anyway , tired here as well today. Drank a bottle plus a glass of wine last night. Stayed up til 1.30 watching telly. Tired and cranky today. Again. And hungry. I'll try a day at a time, but I need a break from booze.
I agree with that feeling of making sure there is plenty alcohol in the house, once I open a bottle.
My life should be it's best, lovely DH, 4yo & 2yo. But I just want to go back to bed. What a waste, again.

Welcome yes very quiet on the bus today so maybe every one is fighting colds or hangovers. I can relate to your post so much - sick and tired of feel I g sick and tired?

Hi babes, I've not posted in ages, my phone hasn't been working and I can rarely get on the pc. I've been catching up when I can.

Not doing very well on the not drinking front, have loads of stressful situations going on and I've not tried at really. I've been telling myself i'm allowed to drink until it passes which is stupid as I'm sure another problem will rear it's ugly head.

I've not drank wine on work nights but come the weekend I'm definitely trying to catch up. The ironic thing is I weight less than ever, and this takes away one of my reasons for not drinking - I can afford the extra wine cals - which is so screwed up...

Just checking in. WW came calling and I had something to eat instead. I know I need to eat at 4 ish to stave off cravings but I don't want to put on weight. Hmm... rather be sober I think.

Welcome yes,I'm on day 2 fancy joining me?

Hi there to looking and ma and Annie

I realise that I cave in whenever life gets hard- wonder what to do about that? Wonder if I'll get beyond that stage one day. Oh well.

Today I won't be drinking.

gugg I'm kinda afraid to join anybody as 3 days is usually all I get to, and that's embarrassing.
I'm doing Slimming World and did not lose weight last week, so that's a motivation as well.
I'll touch back tomorrow, at least I'm in bed now, and sober, yippee.

Hi guggs, that's me, caving in when life gets hard. Although I think in my case I just use it as an excuse so I don't feel guilty for not even trying.

I'm hoping to get some af days in next week, working a fair bit so that will help but I do wonder if I'll ever get to the stage where not drinking is the norm rather than something I have to aim to do?

Hope everyone has a good week, I'll be catching up where I can :)

Hey ladies. I confess, I am up because finishing the bottle of red. Also catching up with friends from my weekend of animal activism. But could do that without the drink, obviously.

I am big on setting dates for new starts (diets, exercise, doing job applications, the bloody wine witch defenses). So tomorrow one of mine. So will join Guggs and Yes and whoever wants to tomorrow, going sober till half term. Yes, also Slimming World lady. Pigged out this week due to funeral of in-law, guilt, hectic schedule, usual!!! Hardly dare weigh in tomorrow but going to try hard until end of the month. Join me! Day one tomorrow. (Have eaten peanut butter from a jar with a knife this evening. I lay my atrocious behaviour before you all in horror)

Have a good week all. And can Wry and Isinde and Spanna and Soc and Baby and Beaches and of course our cheese eating leader Mouse please check in???? Feel like my right arm (left for me actually, am a southpaw) has been cut off without you ladies.

hope I will join you tomorrow. I can match your peanut butter on a knife with a wedge of cranberry Boursin cheese straight from the packet

Welcome yes and well done on day 1

Guggs stop being so hard on yourself peanut. I bet there were some ups and downs in your year sober where you didn't cave. Hope life gets a little easier for you soon xxx

Hi annie good to see you back

Waves to Ma and wishes all brave babes a happy Monday morning!

morning all, well we are a pretty despondent bunch at the moment, except for baby who is looking lovely in the smock of smug, that colour suits you hoping wry is feeling better and the clot is sorting itself out a one way ticket to elsewhere. annie welcome back, I really identified with that phrase you used, 'I do wonder if I will get to the stage where AF is the norm not something I have to aim to do' really want to reach that stage myself but it is a pain, just when I feel bette,r back the ww comes looking more alluring every time. saying that, I am 7 days down (again) feeling good, back on my SW after losing 3 and half stone I kept putting on the same 3 - 4 LB and losing 1lb so had a concerted effort this week without the wine and have lost 7lb wha hay!! someone at work told me I was looking really well... glowing in fact I was must keep remembering it when I feel the temptation next, and yes your words rang a chord, I will also try to remember that lethargic can't be bothered, just want to eat and sleep feeling and the bloaty face and saggy eyes and that feeling of 'What a waste, again' I am only a stone and 1LB from my target weight for the first time in years and years, spent yesterday sorting out my wardrobes and taking in clothes and last night decided to sit and file my feet instead of opening a bottle glamorous so Monday morning and I have woken up sober, clear headed, with nice soft feet