The Brave Babes Battle Bus - In Search Of Sobriety, Sunshine & Survival!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse :)

Welcome to the thread, or our mythical Bus called Gerald!

There is room for everyone. Always

There is help for everyone who wants it. Always

There is unconditional support and kindness. Always

We have two sentences that we believe in here -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

No matter what it is that you drink, how much, how often, we've ALL been in your position at one point or another...... so most of us WILL know exactly what it's like to be YOU

If you'd like to read the last thread, it's below -

THIS IS THE PREVIOUS THREAD

And if you want to read a pretty sobering thread and the history behind these many, the reason why we are all here, fighting to stay/get sober is here -

FIRST EVER BRAVE BABES THREAD

Hope to see you soon :)

Mouse x

DH and i were out walking the dog and we picked loads of brambles and put them in clean, unused poo bags! I have now decanted them into a Tupperware. No-one needs to know.

I have now put sandwich bags in my dog walking bag as there are loads still to ripen. I would like to make jam with them if i can pick enough.

Well done eccles

Fair dos ma,I'm happy to believe that venus is all tatts and sweary,like a sailor

A cleaner? Really? Really,really? Think that might be up there with me looking like a young Kylie in the golden hot pants.

(would have to be an entire fecking gold curtain for my backside)

little make a massive crumble with them and pour cream all over = that's dinner sorted. (is for our tea tonight anyway)

We have just had fish pie for dinner.
I have spent 20 minutes on the phone to my father trying to explain how to set his alram clock which is an exact replica of the other one he already has. 20. Minutes. Saying the same instructions over and over and over..
He can't understand. I can't make him understand. Turn the hand to 6 and push the on off button to on before you go to bed. It doesn't fucking matter when he gets up anyway because he just wanders round the house all day muttering to himself. He is driving me nuts.
I miss distracted chap.

ma blackberry vodka sounds lovely I can relate to the alarm clock, I get regular calls from my elderly mum asking how to do random things to her tv as she has pressed a button and got text up or a speaking voice. I have the same remote so have to talk her through step by step to return it to normal. what has happened to distracted chap? thought you had been getting snoggy?

Trying for an af day tonight, I'm sat bored in front of the tv but telling myself that a drink won't change that.

Had to put an end to it Eccles. Twas lovely, but twasn't right.

ma you are a stronger person than me, I got distracted once and ended up regretting it.

I'm not really. Still check my inbox every day on the off chance....
I wouldn't have any regrets but other people would. Right chap, wrong time.

Dammit ma are you sure? I mean, other people will get over it, kids are better off without parents who are fighting... isn't it time to give yourself some happiness?

Tell me to Shut Up if that is the wrong thing to say, but my heart goes out to you, you give so much to everyone else... and actually in truth my only regret was hurting my DH - but we had a decent marriage worth saving. The actual distraction - no regrets

Thanks aliasbut.....it just can't be. For lots and lots of reasons.but it was lovely to feel special for a wee while. A new experience for me to feel the way I do did. I'll live. < bites wobbly lip hard>

Stop it, you're going to make me cry!

Opal fruit? (Not a green one, obviously, you'll have to turn on the waterworks a bit harder than that if you want more sympathy!)

Can I just make it clear that we're not biting the same wobbly lip, that would be weird.

Hi babes, I'm in a bad situation tonight (not in danger it's all in my head), as I now know DH knows about my use but hasn't confronted me. Working on how to proceed but dying with shame in the meantime til it can be addressed

Evening, tis me, Mouse

I have to say that you guys are fab. You wobble and kick ass at the same time.

I need to catch up with you all. Lots going on in my life and your lives too!! I'm going to be utterly selfish but I will try to tone it down. I need to let it all out and when the time is right in the next few days.... I have to work when, I will.

But for now, Night babes xxx

just pick can you go out together for a walk or something and say you need to talk to him and then tell him you have an alcohol problem and ask for help? A preemptive strike? It might be easier if you bring it up rather than him "accuse" you.

I think you will feel better if you talk to him just. You want to change, you are trying, you are doing all you can. You have our support but real life support from your dh would help even more, if you think he would be supportive.

What do you need? Think about how you can ask him to help you. Is there a support group for families that he could speak with. For alcohol, there is Al-Anon, I don't know if they help people with family members with other addictions but maybe you could find out?

Or are you worried that there will be some kind of backlash from him? Stick with us, you will get through this. Try and commit to that change that you want and make that your absolute priority, don't let this derail you x

just could you write him a letter explaining (or even show him this board) so he knows you want to change?

just what are you most worried about? Are you scared he'll be 'disappointed' in you, and then you'll make yourself feel bad or guilty? Are you scared he'll leave? Are you scared that by speaking about it you will have to do something about it? Are you scared that if you acknowledge it your dh will try to 'control' your use (or your access to it)? Are you sacred that other people will find out? May a bit of all of these, and maybe other things too.

But feeling scared and worried like that IS really, really horrible, and whatever the reality, it won't be much worse than how you are feeling now. If you can work out what you're scared of can you speak to your dh about that? e.g. "I've got a problem with x substance, and I'm scared that if you found out you'd stop loving me / make me go to rehab / want me to tell my doctor / whatever....."

Sending hugs to ma and to mouse and to all my fellow Scots - you've inspired me to go out on a bramble hunt

just maybe it is better he knows? will it perhaps help your resolve to change, ma sorry it was not the right time for distracted chap but remember how good it felt and hang on to that. Day 9 today, nearly cracked yesterday, I was in on my own and a bit bored and feeling sorry for myself, the WW was calling to me and I so nearly called back but hoovered up instead then DH came home and I resisted. feeling good about that today. annie did you manage to distract yourself?

Been out for a jog and then brambling. Will make a crumble to follow the chicken currently in the slow cooker and that will be that. Another day done. Did 3 AF days last week and want to beat that this week.

Hi all!
Back from Cornwall which was brilliant. DD had a great time.

Fell totally off the bus though and drank every day. I'm trying not to beat myself up about it but, again, it proves willpower is pretty low. I REALLY want to be AF today to kick start positive habits again. Gained 3 pounds . And my treadmill is trapped behind stuff workmen have shoved in the garage!!

I'll catch up with the thread later - still not used to this format on my phone so need the iPad. But talk of crumble has made me hungry!

Xx

Struggling

Joey hang in there babe, nice bubble bath, quick walk, make a lovely pudding and eat it now. Keep on keeping on, watch the film to the end x