The Brave Babes Battle Bus - In Search Of Sobriety, Sunshine & Survival!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse :)

Welcome to the thread, or our mythical Bus called Gerald!

There is room for everyone. Always

There is help for everyone who wants it. Always

There is unconditional support and kindness. Always

We have two sentences that we believe in here -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

No matter what it is that you drink, how much, how often, we've ALL been in your position at one point or another...... so most of us WILL know exactly what it's like to be YOU

If you'd like to read the last thread, it's below -

THIS IS THE PREVIOUS THREAD

And if you want to read a pretty sobering thread and the history behind these many, the reason why we are all here, fighting to stay/get sober is here -

FIRST EVER BRAVE BABES THREAD

Hope to see you soon :)

Mouse x

guggs I'm sorry your having a bad day, you would tell us to have a nice bath, jump into a bed with fresh clean sheets and indulge in a bit of reading or a Netflix favourite.

Your so bloody amazing, you deserve some "golden time" xxx

ma your a shining star to us already but dazzle all you wish, I'm glad your putting a brilliantly positive spin on your recent situation.

beaches soc alias snazzy wry little and every babe everywhere, U R FABULOUS xxx

Oh Eccles love are you OK?
baby can relate so much to what you are saying at the mo. I feel my identity has been lost and I only exist through my relationships as wife and mother. I am going to start a new club or hobby too. I want more gliding lessons but can't afford them because I pay out for everyone else's needs.
Time for a change!

ma sore but ok, just very very ashamed.

eccles I hope your not too badly hurt, I really feel for you. After being off wine for a bit, it was probably twice as potent to your system. You were doing so well, this little blip is just that, a painful one but we've all done, many many times. Is dh ok with you?? At least you were in your own home with dh to find you. I'm sending you a big huge hug xxx

It's good to be back, I missed the Bus

While on holiday I did not drink much, and slept like a log. We were so tired every day, just from walking, fresh sea breezes (battling the wind on Criccieth Castle!)

It has made me determined to make some changes in my lifestyle. I want to get fitter, get physically tired out and sleep better. Obviously it's 150 miles to the nearest coast, so I can't do sea air, but am thinking about taking up running. Unfortunately, as DH pointed out, I can't run.

I tried a little bit this evening, I think I'd need to buy proper shoes. My shins hurt even though I only went round the block. DH also tactfully suggested I'd need a better bra...

Hey ,thanks

After all that I had a nice night out with friends and it helped me to get away from the endless house/child/family stuff.

I can identify with feeling lost and needing to make some changes. We're right behind you ma and baby- wow a dancing teacher! You are very glam.

eccles it's ok we all slip when it comes to the ww. All of us. Several times over in my case. Just pick your self up and make a fresh start- odatt.

I hear ya Ma, sometimes I don't know who I am any more because I'm too busy running around after everyone else to stop and think about myself.

eccles I hope you're OK, after my disasterous night out the other week I woke up having lost £50, my favourite Mac lippy and had massive bruises down my forearms and skinned knees (must have gone arse over tit but couldn't even remember). You'll have had a massive fright and must be feeling tender, look after yourself tonight, tomorrow is a shiny new day.

I ended up driving around earlier for about an hour - couldn't bear to be at home because DP was getting on my last wick. I'm tired of thinking about alcohol all the time - does that nagging little booze voice ever go completely away? I feel like telling my brain to shut the fuck up!

joey I'm toying with the idea of digging my bike back out from the back of the shed tomorrow, well done for giving the running a go!

Waves to all x

ma, I am way late to this but, as soon as I read your post, I sensed the dilemma. And ultimately, whatever temptations are placed in your path you have to be true to your own inner compass and whatever values you hold.

So actually it is in the end , all good. You know how strong your inner core is (even in the face of a delightful distraction). And now you can face the reality of your day to day life, and with integrity, say: "I deserve more." So get out there. Expect more, deserve more, achieve more.

eccles oh how much the words in your post bring back memories for me (and lynns your post too). But yes, it can get better.

Honestly it can. and it s so worth it x

joey I'm glad you've returned refreshed from your break. I always find when I'm away and return home, I see everything with fresh eyes, usually how tired the house looks!!! I'm also going to give running a try, as much for my mental state as my physical one, everyone says it's a great way to clear your head and that sounds good to me.

I'm sitting here feeling guilty, dd2 has been a bloody nuisance today and all I've done is tell her off and lose my temper, the very unbalanced atmosphere at home must be affecting her behaviour but I'm crap at consistency and being strict and she is a very stubborn little girl do I know that's what needs to happen. Not easy with dd1 always in a mood or shouting at the wee one for annoying her when she just wants her attention. Dh is away camping in his usual self absorbed bubble so this week I need to set up a routine and stick to it, she goes to bed when she wants, gets up when she wants and generally gets what she wants for an easy life and to offset my horrendous guilt at being a crap mother and letting everyone down with my drinking.

How I'm to gut the house, cook healthy meals, start new hobbies, lose weight and get the wee one settled and spend quality time with my older girl I'm not quite sure but other people manage so I need to get into a routine, I'm always anxious and in a tizzy so I'm in constant disarray.

Anyway I promise tomorrow I will not be so self indulgent, I just don't know how or where to start!!!
But hey at least it will be sober...

Love to all xxx

Sorry I just read guggs snazzy and our wonderful venus's post so extra special fairy dust coming your way. Xxx

We just watched Little Miss Sunshine again, I forgot how much I loved that film

Eccles poor you, I bet today has been miserable. It is true for me too that the first drink triggers the 'what the hell?' button and I am very likely to drink way more than initially planned and get shitfaced. Sounds like you got quite hurt and I hope you were not too sore today. As the other babes have said, tomorrow is a new day xx

Snazzy old vinegar tits! I think the voice does get quieter but in those early days the whispers seem to be incessant. I think telling the brain to shut the fuck up can be a pretty good tactic too! Get that bike out too, it's fun

joey holiday sounds great, if a little cosy in the cottage! Good to know you can all survive without the internet too. I am attempting some huffing and puffing running too. For me the gasping breathing is the worst bit but the dog is quite impressed with the increased tempo walk! Good luck with it.

guggs glad you enjoyed some time with friends! sounds like it was a welcome change from daily treadmill.

ma I am cringing on behalf of your daughter . Really wish I had a Derek in my life, very

baby don't worry about being self indulgent honey, better out than in. I am worried that you are so hard on yourself. None of us is perfect, we all get it wrong, honestly. I love your aims but it is a lot to live up to, how about starting with one new thing each day and remember to congratulate yourself for each achievement. Also please forgive yourself if it doesn't happen. I found the restaurant question really interesting too. When I tried to come up with an answer my brain started weighing up who liked what. I think I like Indian best . Hope you enjoy the ballet class, you will probably be up at the front showing them all what to do in no time

hope how are you doing babe?

Spanna hey sweetpea

Oh, suddenly worried that I might lose this hug post....night babes, sleep tight xx

Hug post?! I meant huge post of course Also 'none of us is' I think should be 'none of us are'. Apparently sober beaches may have a grammar thing! Day 11 done, not to mention a whole weekend. Yay!! I will stop talking to myself now

i missed the bus for a bit.....and fell off the wagon i have to say. had a shitty shitty shitty 2 weeks at work and just couldnt manage. ended up hitting the (wine) bottle.

starting back now. need to get a grip - felt so much less guilty when i was managing my drinking better. i was managing to go without some days and just have one drink on others.

id gone to an AA meeting but felt totally out of place.

Hi Vicar, good to have you back .

babes

just ran 21.2km and I'm 106 days sober. Feeling like a frigging rock star (a dead one mind you).

love to you all. eccles get back on the bus. We've all done that shit before so don't be hard on yourself.

Got to go and put my feet up. They hurt.
xx

Welcome backvicar and well done to the mighty socfish who is the new Jesus
Thanks Venus it was the right decision for a lot of other people but that doesn't make me feel any less resentful and sad. It will pass I suppose.
I plan to get out for a walk today at least to pass the time. Sounds like lots of us here need to make changes but it is hard to climb out of the rut when everyone else is dragging you back in.
Voices
Voices in my head,
Chanting," kisses.bread.
Prove yourself.fight.shove.
Learn.earn.look for love."

Drown a lesser voice,
Silent now of choice:
"Breathe in peace,and be
Still,for once,like me."

Vikram Seth

That's a wonderful poem.

Anyone else quite fancy the sound of a hug post?
I'll take anything going : )

Big squishy hug guggs feel my jelly belly for the last time babe.

Decided to start a new sunny day with optimism. While sitting in the garden sipping my coffee looking upwards enjoying the serene sky, dd2 aged 3 decided to tip a bucket of slimy filthy slug filled 10 year old water she found over her head as the ice water challenge while dd1 has shouted she dropped her phone into a bit of her bed that you couldn't manage if you tried and is happy a panic attack at it's temporary loss, screw driver required, or sledge hammer.... This is not in my plan, this does not happen in "Serenetyville" EXTERMINATE, EXTERMINATE xxx

Baby your DDs made me LOL I like the sound of Serenetyville can I live there too please? Big hugs to you lovely one sorry that I went on and on yesterday and thank you for taking it with good grace you are such a warm and understanding, gorgeous Babe x

Guggs hugs from me too lovely xxx

Ma enjoy your walk I'm going to go for a run today

Beaches ouch that peanut hurt, you little minx I love the fact that you're on my heals Babe, that motivates me too. Day 21 today I can't quite believe I've got this far. I'm still unmotivated to do all those tedious jobs that I should be doing I just can't be arsed

Have a good day all x

Morning babes day 1
I need to get a few af days in. I had two glasses of wine friday night, one and a half last night. It was only a half as I started getting awful stomach pains, around the belly button, don't know what organ's there, and couldn't drink it all. Barely slept last night with the pain which is unusal for me and I can't help thinking it's been caused by alcohol. Years ago after a few nights heavy drinking I had a similar thing.

So having made the dds bacon, eggs and toast for breakfast I'll be having soup! I wouldn't have had the eggs and bacon anyway, I'll make nice food for everyone else and I'll sit there with a coffee

Taking the dds to a park later, really struggling to look after them and not lose the plot. I can't disipline them at all! It's just water off a duck's back - hoping that having them out and distracted will mean I don't need to as much...

Hope everyone has a good day :)

Hug thread is good, can give and receive.
Been to dads - he's not having a good day. Stripped his bedding and collected the dirty laundry. All the clean stuff from the last few weeks is still sitting in carrier bags! He is having difficulty breathing today and would just like to be able to stop completely. If he was a dog he would be put out of his misery!

Love the poem ma

beaches a hug post sounds great, I keep telling my DCs "You're never too old for a cuddle!" my mum still says it to me and I'm 36

soc well done on 106 days, triple figures is something I dream of!

baby I did chuckle at you setting the scene in the garden, sounds as chaotic as a morning here! We're all still lounging about in PJs and I'm being Minecrafted to death by DS; the mindnumbing music alone is enough to make me want to run for the hills never mind his running commentary of every move he makes, argh!

Anne nothing worse than tummy trouble, wonder if you've picked up a bug?

Good morning/afternoon to guggs and vicar

I woke up feeling pissed and had this awful feeling I'd been drinking but it must have been a dream. DP has buggered off to some charity golf event he can't play for toffee so it's just me and the kids today, no doubt I'll be taxi driving DD1 all over the place but first I need to convince DS to get dressed (he's ASD and would live in his underpants and never leave the house if he could - I can see the logic in that, mind, I feel like that most days ) DD2 is the calming middle child who has offered to walk Snazzydog so I'm not too stressed out with them all just yet!

Hi Snazzy sounds like you've got it all under control I know that minecraft commentary my DD1 would play all day if I let her have a good day

Ma your Dad. Big hugs darling x

afternoon all, thanks so very much for the understanding and not remonstrating with me. I still feel really ashamed, babyjane DH was ok with me, he's a good un. I got up to find a card propped by the bloodstains saying 'crime scene - do not cross' he has a sick sense of humour. Actually think I scared him, he said he thought I was dead and shouted my name, apparently I sat up and he said 'what the chuff are you doing' my reply 'sleeping' he thinks this is funny. he does not think my swollen bruised and cut lip is quite so funny. I have shaken myself and am seriously back on the bus, I will remember this the next time the WW flashes her glittery cloak at me. it's so not worth it. I want to be AF and feeling alert and healthy again. sorry I am being all about me. I am just so grateful to have found you all. thanks again.