DRY 5

[allhailqueenmab]

Starting this before the old one gets filled up!
this is the thread for the alcohol free.
Join us!

Not sure if it's okay to post, if you're not dry.

I have failed. I don't even normally drink on a Monday. Have sunk a bottle of red. I fucking hate myself.

Of course it is elfina. Do you think you have been drinking as you panicked about stopping?

Elfina of course you can post here. Grab a big glass of water & get to bed. Tomorrow is another day.
I drank more times than I can remember when I had resolved to stop. I hated the power it had over me. But it's possible to stop & the benefits are really worth it.

0h Elfina course you can still post I've been there too, telling myself I was stopping and then drinking in the next day or two. I think as Biggles said you panic at the thought of stopping and get overwhelmed by it all. Hope you feel better this morning and dont let it put you off trying again or coming back here

Thats brilliant Haggis, really positive, glad you had such a good time.

Your mother sounds like really hard work Biggles. With you on the pissed people Christmas only it will be my parents who start the ball rolling with sherry for breakfast, port for brunch and wine/beer rest of the day. Not that I can say much as I used to join them.

Hi again.

Why is it such an emotional roller coaster!!

Do most do AA?

Hi Gum (and everyone!). I think it's an emotional roller coaster because we actually 'feel' our emotions again now we're sober. No nice easy way to numb our feelings. Sometimes great, often hellish…..

We are a diverse bunch on here and some love AA, some really don't find it works for them and others are dipping in to see what they think. I find it hugely helpful, but did struggle with some aspect of it early on. I went to a brilliant meeting on Christmas morning my first year which was a great relief and gave me strength to get through the rest of the day when I was surrounded by the usual booze fest.

God Biggies your mother sounds almost unbelievably hard to deal with. I feel for you with every fibre of my being. Can you get DH and DCs to try to shoulder some of it for you so you can retreat slightly when she is with you?

She is . Very complicated and awful relationship to be honest. I a too soft. I intend to pay the children to fight a lot. DH just retreats as he would otherwise be incredibly rude and he can't do that. At least she won't be able to stay as we don't have enough beds this year . Mind you, she'll be really pissed off with me about that :(

I suspect the fact that she can't stay will make a huge difference. No matter how dreadful she is at least you know you can all breathe a huge sigh of relief when she is deposited back home. May give you enough strength to not take a meat cleaver to her during the day….. That balance between behaving decently (i.e. not being rude) and not being a doormat is always a tricky one I think…..

How are you today elfina?
Gum been to one meeting but thinking about going back. Ditto what Also said about emotional rollercoaster.
Biggles You are a better woman than I to at least tolerate your DM. Even that is too much for me and would be the biggest trigger to drink. I admire you enormously :)

Say that on Boxing Day

With pleasure

We will all be witnesses for the defence

I may need you all !

Biggles I still owe you coffee and cheese scone missus! Time before Xmas? :)

I was sorry to miss out on the last London gathering so would be up for joining if there is another one (if that's ok!).

I'll be able to get away from work for an hour or so from next Tuesday! Can do Livingstones?

Biggles Tuesday looks good. What time?
Also of course that's okay! We'll keep you posted when the next date comes up :)

Only been to two meetings gum, second today as I thought it wouldnt hurt before my day out tomorrow. I think the one thing that is striking me is how much nearly everyone talks about drinking to try and hide the loneliness or emptiness inside of them or to put on a facade of a personality they don't have, like to give them more confidence as they're shy. Something I can relate to.

Quite funny that from the way people are talking to me and mention ages they all assume Im a quite a young thing in my mid twenties. Ill take my compliments where I can find them

Hope youre ok today Elfina?

11am?

Also hoping you're ok Elfina

Biggles OK see you then :)

Hi All

Very curious about what you all look like, have fun at London meet ups.

Stick with it Elfina. As others have said, we've all had shaky starts. The thing is to try and try again. Keep on going, you can do it.

Biggles hats off to you with your mum that sounds so tricky. At least now you won't have alcohol piled on top, adding to your problem rather than solving it!

Anyone else facing their first alcohol free Christmas? I mean I've done it while pregnant but this'll be the first time for me.

I was thinking of focusing on the positive aspects to make it easier. So:

1. Not being hungover on Christmas morning. The whole squealing present opening at dawn thing might even be fun sans hangover, no?

1. Absence of mystifyingly sweet 'festive' disgusting drinks like Baileys

1. Money saved because of 2.

1. Lovely morning walks in fresh air on New Years Day to welcome in the new year instead of clutching head/Panadol/toilet bowl and groaning.

I promise you the first one of your reasons was really huge for me on my first sober Christmas. Priceless.

My first sober Christmas too sydney, bar one year when ds was just out of scbu a few weeks and one year when he was hospitalised with respiratory problems over Christmas. Never been pregnant over Christmas so other than those two have been pissed every year since about the age of 16.

Yes to the without hangover Christmas morning, not getting tired and wanting to go to sleep during the day while the dc want to play, maybe enjoying my dinner for a change as if I drink too much my hunger goes and I can't be bothered eating. Haven't ever really enjoyed a Christmas dinner I dont think. Not waking up the next day and thinking what the hell happened last night, please dont let me have offended one of my family/made a tit out of myself.

There's a run happening here New Years Day in aid of Tiny Life, a premature baby charity so thinking of signing up to that. Will be a good way to kick start 2015 and it's a charity close to my heart as ds was prem.

Thanks Also

I'm really looking forward to that part.

That run sounds like a brilliant idea, Broken. Fabulous cause and I think 2 things that really help when you are getting/trying to stay sober are (1) really throwing yourself into some sort of exercise and (2) feeling you are doing something worthwhile. So a Tiny Life run sounds like killing 2 birds with 1 stone.