DRY 5

[allhailqueenmab]

Starting this before the old one gets filled up!
this is the thread for the alcohol free.
Join us!

oh dear everyone seems so fed up. Corn, I really hope you get things sorted out It's the end of summer thing I reckon. We had a nice night away but I did feel a bit ragey when I couldn't (chose not to ) drink at dinner, especially when the lovely hotel owners came over and bought us a drink They'd forgotten to put a kettle in pur room and were mortified! lovely people. Anyway, I had an alcohol free lager again. I think I'll make them my holiday treat sort of thing

Today is Dh birthday AND my ten month-sery!! Proud and sort of deflated all at the same time for some reason. Just blergh.

Still, we must all plod on and remember the reasons we are doing this. Have a great day everyone. I hope everyone is feeling a bit better. We rock

Hi, another lurker here. Since the start. I hope Mildred and Sorcha are still about with new names.
I can relate to so many posters on here.
I drink a bottle of wine every night. At 12.5 stone I am the heaviest I have ever been. I have a 2yo and a 4yo, and I often struggle to cope because I'm just too tired
I did AA a few years ago, and found it very helpful but I didn't continue as I found it easy not to drink while pregnant. Then we moved and I'm afraid now I'd meet people I know.
My children were conceived by IVF, and instead of enjoying them everyday, I am choosing to put them in childcare so I can recover, and do it all again the next night.
Cornchips, thank you for sharing. I had to skip ahead from August first, as I'd be lurking forever, and I'm so sorry you're having things tough.
I will only buy wine today, or drink tonight.
Now I'll have a nap so I can take the kids to the park later.

not instead of 'only'

I did wonder at the "only" Yesclan . Very glad you have delurked. I read this and the Brave Babes very many months before I was ready to do this. Hope this evening goes ok.

Belated Happy birthday Staying Dry. Happy 10monthaversary Biggles.

Thank you for the birthday wishes Got my serenity back intact, spoke to my sponsor and realised what was bugging me, faced it, dealt with it, back on track
sounds abit gloomy still in sober land as was said in previous post, it will pass.
Dealing with your partners anxiety isn't good for you and your recovery, remember to protect your own sobriety above all else chick xx

Hello all,

Just a quick update (look away now if you don't want to read about my having a drink).

I know I said I wouldn't post (and I won't after this), but I wanted to let you know how it felt to have a drink. Once I'd got over the fact that I was making the informed choice to have a drink, not an evil-addiction-relapse monster on my shoulder, I stopped panicking. I had a couple of drinks when I went out to dinner with some friends. It was fine, but here are my thoughts.

That moment we are craving is so short-lived, elusive even. Even after a couple of sips the voice tried to pipe up, the one that wanted me to get completely trashed. You're chasing something that doesn't exist. Trying to fill that void. I ignored the voice but there was something a bit sinister about it all.

I also found that my mood felt instantly lower, and that drinking more seemed the only obvious way to cheer up .

The final thing, is that 3 drinks made me feel a bit grubby and headachey the next morning. Soiled if you will! I'm so used to feeling amazing.

So, there you have it. Will I drink again? Not sure. I don't want to become desensitised to the reactions I've had, which will inevitably happen if I keep drinking regularly. And it's clear to me that not drinking makes me feels a hell of a lot better than drinking, so regular periods of abstinence will have to be factored in if I do drink again.

Good luck everyone.

See you soon when it all goes tits up for me

Morning mistress. I totally understand that - I am the same with smoking. I have started having 2 a day at work four days a week (why??? !!) And I so look forward to that first cigarette, I almost salivate when i get up and know that I will be having one when i get there! As soon as I have it I feel quite quite sick, know I look stupid and actually feel really cross! Still I have my second and then wait for the next day!

Bloody ridiculous.

The thought of that 'first' bit of the 'forbidden fruit' is a million times more amazing than the reality.

Brilliant description though. I hope you're ok and stay well xx

Thanks Mistress, an honest description of how it feels. That's useful for me. I am actually terrified at the thought of drinking. I'm not sure why - and I'm certainly not saying that I'm immune to relapse, at all.
I kind of think if I ever went back, it would be changed forever. I don't think I can be bothered dealing with it.

Stay well!

Morning all!
Feeling slightly less grumpy than before - thank god, I was doing my own head in! Mistress - no worries, you have to do what' right by you and Biggles, yep - I was exactly the same about smoking too. Still sucking nicotine lozenges furiously. Forbidden fruit is such a good analogy - we always want what we can't have ....
Don't know if anyone watched Addicts' Symphony on C4 but it was very good if you want to catch it on 4OD.
Happy sober Friday :)

Haggis we were posting at the same time but I'm with you - fearful about having a drink. I'm sure that will change in time but right now it gives me chills and not in a good way.

Lucy,thanks for the heads up about Addicts' Symphony. Missed it and will now watch. I do so much watching of stuff on my PC in bed these days (rock and roll lifestyle….)

Gosh, that looks brilliant. I'll watch it later.

It is superb and unsurprisingly I wrote a blog post about it!

Thanks for the reminder Lucy. Your blog is my round up of all the stuff I meant to watch / listen to like You and Yours etc. I read the Guardian article about the Addicts Symphony earlier in the week. Will download on 4OD.

I also watched the Winona Ryder "Lois Wilson story". Really enjoyed it, she's a great actress. Bill Wildon kind of reminded me of my Dad .... but that's another story.

Wow- am just watching the addicts symphony (and putting ds to bed and posting). I'm just really blown away by this program. I can identify with all of the stories and their huge issues with confidence and perfection.

Very interesting how much of their drinking and drugging stories begin with being 13/14 and finding the pressure of performing too much and so they began to drink. And that poor conductor who lost his son Part of me was beginning to think about having a drink tonight- not a chance after watching that.

What amazing and brave people they are. Think I might be proud of being in recovery now not that I have the talent or ability of any of those fellow addicts.

Feeling very grateful and calm now.
Happy sober friday all x

Less impressed that they put adverts for alcohol on in the ad breaks. Really? Seriously? ffs!

Guggenheim - EXACTLY what I wrote in my blog post (out in a couple of days) booze adverts really??!!!! Beautiful isn't it? And you're right his son's story is just heartbreaking.

Just watched it and enjoyed it. Always amazes me how many character effects addicts share.
Confidence issues, perfection issues, dislike of changes in routine,dislike of surprises how ever well intentioned.
All evidence that alcoholism is a disease. All the above the symptoms.

Exactly so. Think I'll add 'being massively oversensitive' and tend to quit rather than accept failure/pressure/criticism.

one of the good things though is that once you realise that you have these character defects, when the self doubt strikes you can say to yourself, hang on thats the alcoholism making me over sensitive, insecure, thinking its me they're talking about. Happens to me quite a lot
Also the fact that I can remember the last 24 hours now means I know they're not talking about me don't miss that feeling one bit x

I am watching addicts symphony and it is amazing how much I identify with them, it's amazing isn't it? This is the perfect thing to watch as I went to yet another celebratory bash today (I hope this does not out me) and I had to leave early as I was really struggling. Now I am worried that I am being slated and gossiped out.

This too will pass and all that but I feel agitated and worried and the old feelings of feeling disconnected were back with a vengeance, much more than I have ever had since I stopped drinking. I felt like I could barely talk to people, could not get my words out and that everyone thought I was an enormous fake. I feel weird.

I am trying to relax and calm down. I did not want to drink but felt too big for my skin, if that makes sense; clumsy and messy.

Hope everyone is doing well x

Hi everyone, lurking, not posting. Hope everything is fine. Kate, I understand what you mean about feeling too big for your skin.

hope everyone has a good day.

I wondered was anyone up for a London meet up, soonish. I have many friends, but not one of them doesn't drink. And a lot of them drink A LOT. Funny how we surround ourselves with people similar to ourselves.

Anyway, I am genuinely interested in making some sober friends IRL. If anyone is up for it - you can PM me or post here. Interested to know if a week day evening after work would be best. I know lots of us are scattered round the country, but some people mentioned that they come up to London for work etc. please ignore this if you have no desire whatsoever to meet people IRL. For some people it completely goes against what Mumsnet is for etc. I have met up with some people from my third child birth group from Mumsnet on various occasions and really enjoyed it, but it's not for everyone.

Sorry just laughing at my previous post "I have many friends" - sounds pompous and like I'm desperately trying to assure you all that I'm not a weird internet loner person

Morning,have been up and out for a run,enjoying a sober saturday.

haggis I'd love a meet up. I often think about going to meet ups or posting on other threads and then remember that i'm a recovering alkie with family issooos so when people ask for my username i'd have to say "erm...um..thingy..I've forgotten.."
A meet with sober people who know who I am would be fine

I'd prefer to meet one weekend and don't really mins where.

stayingdry I really need to work on all that. Do you know how to cope with these things because of aa or is it something you worked out for yourself? (I have no idea why I want to know that)

I'm beginning to find that I'm able to persist and stick with things a little longer now.Just anything really- running,study,plans. I've always had the fault of giving up as SOON as the tiniest thing goes wrong,just like we saw the people in AS doing last night. They were extremely brave to show their own flaws to all and sundry like that,think they have done a good deed for the rest of us.

If I was being really picky then I don't like the title 'Addicts' symphony. No,they were recovered addicts and deserved a more respectful title.

Anyway happy saturday all.