autistic ex husband

[ptsdhelp]

As a result of years of events of my ex husband failing to acknowledge or consider anyone else emotions or feelings two people including a professional counsellor have suggested that he may be on the autistic spectrum. Which would apparently explain his inability to relate to how his behaviour and thoughtlessness affects others.... does anyone have experience of this?

It will be pointless. Do it if it makes you feel better, just be aware that you won't achieve much else.

Garage sale? Just reply saying "I've been living with your things for 2 years. You've had ample time to collect these so I'm assuming you've just abandoned them. As a reasonable person, however, I will allow you another week to collect your things. If they are not collected by the 27th July then we will be having a garage sale and I will be putting any money raised towards the childcare which I need to pay for over the Summer, as this was arranged when you refused to help. Many thanks, ptsd."

OK, this sounds pretty shit for you.

1. Leaving his stuff at yours is a control tactic. Tell him he collects it by X date or it is going to charity. Or put it all in storage for 4 weeks and tell him that's where it is but you are only paying for four weeks, after which time they will dispose of it/whatever.

1. It's good you are keeping email track of contact arrangements. Ignore any moaning and stick to what has been agreed. If he doesn't like it he will have to go to court which is unlikely.

1. You are clearly under a lot of strain. I don't think you have really weighed up the pros and cons of moving home where you would have support. You say DD would be upset but if you are all more supported and happier surely that would offset her reaction to the change?

Oh, storage is a great idea. Some will lend you a van to move the items into there too.

Thanks ladies... I am under a lot of strain.... he's making me I'll. I called my sister yesterday and just sobbed. Earlier I heard something being thrown at my window. I looked down to see my sister and her kids. They took a 4hour ttrain journey to come and support me. They're staying a few days to help build me back up. I feel so lucky. She will also deal with ex whilst she's here.

And I emailed him back to tell him his suggested date of mid august isn't convenient and he needs to collect his stuff by the third. I didn't rise to all the other crap.

OP I'm so glad your sister is there to support you. What a lovely person she must be.

You did exactly the right thing in dealing with the email. Well done you

Well done, you! It's great that your sister's with you, it's a very tough thing to do alone and a hug once in a while is always welcome. DrJuno's right, the email was great.