The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Sipping Super Summer Mocktails Whilst Soaking Up Some Sun.

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

I'm what some would call a 'controlled' drinker these day, but I wasn't always and I'm not alone on this wonderful bus, Gerald, when I say that.

We have drinkers who drink each day, those who abstain completely and those who are not sure what it is that they actually want just yet....

We won't judge you for drinking, no matter what your reason is, we've all been in your shoes somewhere along the way!! And we have ALL used every excuse under the sun too!

We have some Babes who ride on the Roof-Rack, (clinging on for dear life ) and then we have an expandable Side-Car, which some Babes use, but the bus, well, the bus, our wonderful Gerald, who takes us here and there, to pick up people in need of an unbiased and much needed ear to listen to. :)

There are lots of ears on this bus, and not a single one will turn you away and not listen!

Two things that we do believe here are -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

If you are lurking and reading this thread, there is a reason for it, isn't there?

Stay lurking or come and say hello! We don't always bite.

And for those who'd like a bit of history, HERE'S THE LAST THREAD

And of course, THIS IS WHY WE ARE ALL HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE, A VERY AWE INSPIRING READ

See you soon x

guri I'm glad I could help a little. there is a lot of aimless wandering at the beginning, you will soon find other ways to fill your time, it's habit more than anything, sugar cravings are a big danger at this stage, huge amounts in beer and wine and sometimes it's that over the alcohol that triggers strong cravings, vitamins are so helpful, vitamin b1 is used medically to help with withdrawal and craving, even a multi vitamin can help. stay strong and your doing great, day 4 the good bits really kick in, have a good day babe xxx

blossom x posted with you, can you plan an AF night and plan a "pampering" night. I know it sounds naff but sounds like your mood and self esteem has taken a bashing. Honest to God I.was drinking 1 and a half bottles of wine a night with no hangover, I think the no hangover bit is.probably not a good sign, I thought it didn't affect me but since I've cut down/given up, I realise the impact the wine was having on every fibre of my being. Maybe you should try just the wine tonight, if you have nothing at all it might be too much for your system, the more knowledgeable babes will advise. Your here, your posting so you've started the road to change. Big hug babe xxx

Thanks baby I know what you mean about hangover, I don't think I have had a dry day since Dec, am seriously worried about my health. But do feel ill and look incredibly well. Just wondering with all going on whether giving up completely is viable. Wine soothes away the butterflys in my stomach.

babyjane I'm on the vitamins. And I'm very nearly on the wine. So I came on here. if you see random posts across the board you'll know I'm just keeping my hands busy.

He flaming pulled me back in, just to prove he could I suppose. Now I'm being ignored again. That I can cope with, I'm so used to him withdrawing affection (because he's always the one in control ). I hate it when he says stuff like that. "I'm not the one losing control" with a smug look on his face as my voice hits so high it goes altogether.

I'd almost let him go, and I guess he knew it, out came the charm offensive again, via my weak spot, LittleLab.

As I said, I could cope, but I have a very stressful day tomorrow, I have struggled to sleep these last two nights. And the worst of it is I know I have to be clear headed tomorrow or I risk everything. I'm so scared. My usual way of coping with scared is to have a glass of wine, I know I won't stop at one today. I hit M&S for coconut water, bread and butter pudding and pasta, my aim was to heap on the carbs so I'm drowsy.

I just want someone to tell me I'm going to be okay, but it's difficult when my boss argues black is white with me. Why does he do that? I feel little enough without being squashed. Is he waiting for me to fail so he can ask me to leave?

I had a brain inflammation 5 years ago, all due to autoimmune problems. It led to me having to go cold turkey with alcohol for two whole years due to the medication I was on. So why do I find it so shiting difficult to do now?

I know why. I was single 5 years ago. Just me, GentleLab and LittleLab. Just Love. No mind games or shite.

Aww sorry folks. Flaming ignore my whinging, lovely Babes, I'm on a real downer today. I'm away to walk my lovely wee girl and fuck it, I am going on the swings. I right fancy a swing. Right up to the bumps

Catch you later, lovely folk, xx

baby aww shit, I just read my previous post back and my first sentence sounds sharp, dismissive and rude when it really wasn't meant to be. The vitamins are helping, I think, my skin looks better. I think I need to be on them a little longer, I'm determined I'm going to be a better version of me health wise, I've let everything slide and I hate myself for that. I used to really take care of myself you know?

That's what I was saying in my head and then the little gobshite sat on my shoulder took over. I think things then race ahead with typing and it comes out wrong

Sorry quine, really I am xxx

wry you can do it...sounds like you have a plan in place already...soft drink and carbs, doggy walk, keeping busy, early night and a reason not to be fuzzy headed tomorrow. So sorry you're going through a tough time but don't let him get this one over on you too.

I'm feeling shattered today, Day 3.

Day 3 today as well Alison - my aim is to make it to Friday - I want to NOT drink during the week....(although in my silly head, I think wow, I have gone 2 days, wahoo me,...lets celebrate bahaha)

I have planned a playdate for DS and his mates this arvo, so can't drink ...

I will get some multivitamins today, my head feels heavy and my bones ache....oh dear god, what have I been doing to myself?

Hi Babes. Just wanted to welcome all the new babes on to the bus. It doesnt matter if you are trying to cut back or have just come to the unpleasant realization that you are a problem drinker: we are all here, arent we?
I dont have much advise for the first few days of going alcohol free, because each of us arrive at this conclusion at different stages and for different reasons. Personally, I used the old reverse psychology trick on myself. "If Im not an alcoholic, then surely I can go 5 days without drinking". So to prove to myself that I wasnt a person with a drinking problem, I forced myself not to drink. It was unpleasant, and I used the time to read up on alcohol problems. It resonated with me too much. The similarities were too strong to deny. So for me, I used the first few days to accept that perhaps this was something that demanded a sea change, a primary focus.
The practical aspects of quitting: replacing sugar, curbing cravings, redirecting time etc will all depend on your circumstances. Universal is the support. This bus was a life saver for me, as was AA (though I no longer attend). Keep posting, talking and trying and we will keep reading, listening and supporting. It is possible and it is worth it.
Today I will not be drinking.

Evening beautiful babes

baby I loved that bit from a gazillion posts ago about how us (however you want to define that) drink when it all goes pear shaped but normal drinkers tend to drink when they feel happy- you said it better but that was the general gist. How very true! I am on the mend,knackered and missing my uncle but still here and grateful to be sober.

Right my lovely babes - I'm not going to nc because I'm waaaay too tired but massive congratulations to babes struggling with the first 3 nights/ days- that takes a special kind of strength. It gets much,much easier.Try to find a way to think about your feelings- keep a diary,tell the cat,write an email and send it to yourself- let go of the shit life has thrown at you today.

And this is something which keeps me on the straight and narrow- I fuck up so often and in so many aspects of my life,over and over again,because I'm an idiot and because that is what life is. NOTHING is worse than that pathetic little island on the sofa where I sat in drinking every night. Every time I fuck up I give myself a hard time,alongside all the other voices doing so but the difference is I have my sobriety. It might not seem much to anyone who is not an alcoholic but it is mine and it can't be taken away. Even when I lapsed I still had that 13 months behind me and i was able to get back on the wagon.So for today,don't pick up that drink,nurture that little sober part of your soul- it is yours to keep.

Today will not be drinking.

Hi babes, quick post whilst I get the chance to. I can't get on on my phone, somethings happened to my settings and the font is now tiny.

I've not drank wine in nearly two weeks, however I have been having bottles of 0.8 percent lager. I had about 9 units last week. I'm happy enough with that although I suspect the wine cravings will come back when the weather gets colder.

Funnily enough my anxiety levels have been through the roof. Work related stress seems to be ever increasing, I even have nightmares about the place :( We had a falling out with a neighbour over them moving their fence over a foot into our garden; that seems to have resolved although the atmosphere is frosty. H is taking a former business partner to court, it doesn't involve me yet I'm all churned up about it. On the plus side I'm the lightest I've been in about ten years, and I seem to have got it through my thick head that the best thing I can do for myself right now is keep well away from the wine bottle!

Had my swing and feel a wee bit more myself again. Sitting in front of masterchef with my ready meal. Wrong but right. I figure the less time standing in the kitchen tonight the better. Jason Connery! I didn't recognise him.

Alison, well done on your third day, go you! It's a real struggle at times, but we will all keep each other going. Thank you for your kind words, and you're right, he'd love for me to go off the rails again. Then he can go into his "I'll look after you" mode. Yup. When I'm too flat to fight my corner.

nzgurl Haud gaun lass, haud gaun. How did the playdate go? Not long until Friday, stay on the bus for a hug when you need one. They give good hug on here!

blossom how are you doing? Thinking of you, it's hard when your heart is feeling frail. Alison had it spot on, we can't allow them to tip us over the edge. We'll get there, it may not be an easy path, but we'll get there.

Tomorrow I will make myself proud. Feck everyone else. I matter. Me. Not them.

And I'm shutting my mouth and eyes while whirling on the roundabout of life.

Big bosies to those that need, today I will not be drinking. xx

yea- well done annie and wry another day done. Bollocks to the ww.

annie you have a lot to feel anxious about - perfectly normal and sensible to feel stress when the shit hits the fan vile expression
Maybe try those herbal stress relief tablets- kalms? I used them earlier this year when I worked at the horrible school and they really did help me stay calm. think I took them for 3-4 weeks and felt a bit better after that so didn't need them.

wry don't worry I didn't read anything abrupt at all into your post, dinny worry ma darlin... I'm sorry you've got so much to contend with, you are such a warm, charming and funny soul, I don't like to think of you in a bad relationship or stressed out, you've became very dear to us on our little bus. If you a need a pal, we're here for you Mrs.... I'm also having relationship woes with my decent but detached dh and I lost my lab a few months ago and I have an autoimmune illness so we have a lot in common.

guggs I love your eloquent post and I own my sobriety, sadly I own all the problems it has made me see. I'm like a middle aged sleeping beauty awoken from a 3 year drunken stupor!!! still your right about owning it, I like the way you said it, you wise fabulous babe.

why you continue to be a source of lovely wonder to me, I love to see your name pop up.

I watched a cancer survival advert today talking about all the small insignificant things survivors appreciate about life and it made me feel rather small so I have decided to love more, laugh more and be kinder to myself and others, though my 3 year old is challenging this ethos as we speak.....

Strength to every babe everywhere tonight xxxxx

Morning babes
What a bunch of amazing messages to wake up to. I reckon you lot must be some of the most wonderful woman in the world.

I found my first few days and weeks of being sober so hard. It's like being naked and raw and everything jarred and I questioned everything about my life. But it slowly seems to be getting better. Still not perfect and never will be, but I'm not seeing things through a alcoholic fog and then a alcoholic sober nightmare. Hard to describe it all. It just feels like life is getting better and I'm getting stronger. I rarely have anxiety now - that was all alcohol related. I try and practice daily gratitudes. It makes me see and appreciate the small things sometimes in my desperation to feel gratitude.

Today the sun is shining and I'm really fucking grateful for that.
Stay strong babes. It really is worth it.

Soc xx

haha Wry - I read your first sentence and though "ya what?" I am in New Zealand, so playdate is just about to happen (3.30pm here, NZ time).

Just a question - went to the doctor today for an unrelated to alcohol (hopefully) issue and need to get bloods done tomorrow - has anybody had issues with their LFT? I am hoping I don't, mind you, it may give me the kick up the butt I need I suppose....

Just organising some nibbles for the kids, and having a coke (because that is another vice/addiction)

Take care all xx

Dont give up the coke just yet nz. It has sugar to help curb alcohol cravings and it is a non alcoholic drink you enjoy!

Haha Why - I think I will turn into a coke bottle at this rate....But day 3 done and dusted, and a few more grey hairs thanks to lively 5 year olds...

I hope you are all having a good nite / day...Thanks for the support xx

Good morning campers,

Day 12 and I was thinking how come I'm so determined this time!!! Well despite my l

Long term reliance on wine, I gave up no problem why I was pregnant, a higher power at work to protect my child. This time I must do it for my mental health and my family. Without boring you with the details I have worried everyone around me sick, if I'm caught drinking again my teenage dd will disown me and my parents have stepped In so "save me" from myself so many times, I simply can't and won't do it to them again. So I once stayed sober to protect my baby this time it's for my family and my life.

Joining slimming world this afternoon, my fridge is looks like I've murdered an aquarium full of fish I've bought so much, fail to prepare prepare to fail!!!

Hope you guys are ok today guri and blossom I'm willing you on.

I was lying in bed last night thinking of every single babe I've come to know here wondering where you all are, how you live, wiling you all strength and happiness. I would pass any one of you in the street yet you are all so special to me, what a magical mystical bus this is!!!

Life is sometimes tough and disappointing but there are little gems of wonder that help me keep the faith, you guys are those little gems xxxxxx

Have a splendid Thursday y'all xxx

Morning Babes, sorry have been AWOL for a couple of days, with a busy time at work, DH home, DF visiting and trying to sell and buy a house.

Just starting day six, and starting to see the benefits - the shape of my face has changed as the boozy bloating goes away, and although I have put a pound or too on, my tummy is looking smaller.

The WW is whispering at some very odd times - like an hour ago - WTF? But I have had some victories, like sitting on a sunny pub patio overlooking a lake and swigging lime and soda without feeling hard done by.

Be strong today lovely ladies.

Baby, doing it 'for yourself' is so hard for so many of us.

Hi all- I am still here - had some slip ups - but back on it now :).

hey baby
Something switched in me this time too. Not entirely sure what it was though. I'm by no means complacent, the number of times I started Day 1 is astounding. But here I am. On about day 54. This time it stuck. If we keep trying and keep trying one day it must surely work.

Hi all

Haven't read the full thread but really wanting to cut right down on the vino myself.

I'm knack eye with a v lively baby and my DH is far from impressed about how much I'm drinking (neither am I)

Triggers for me are lunchtime (I know) and when dd goes down for the night.

Do you mind me asking how you all distracting are yourselves and what you're drinking instead?

Thank you. I think you're all very brave.