Do Your Parents/In-Laws Intend for You to Provide Elder Care??

[FixItUpChappie]

I don't mean accidentally because shit happens - I mean intentionally as in that is their retirement plan.

If so, are you okay with that? Is your spouse okay with it? Did you all discuss it in advance or was it just "surprise! we have no money!!"? How did you broach the topic? Do want them to contribute? What about physical care? Do you just send money or do you have them live with you?

More and more (for various reasons) I'm getting the impression that my in-laws spend above their means (think travel-lifestyle), live hand to mouth and have no retirement "plans" per se. They already do a lot of freeloading for lack of a better word. I see some behaviour that signals to me we are going to have an issue. That and they announced to my mother that they are so lucky to have children who will care for them in their old age . Well my DH would be the contender for that job and I know they haven't asked for his perspective (or mine).

Just curious to hear perspectives.

[civilfawlty]

Given that my parents offered no help, financial or practical, when I was on my owns with my DD, I have a hard time imagining going far above and beyond when they are stuck. They hurt me more than I can say.

[smalllondon]

In my mind there is nothing more important in this world than family, if you are lucky enough to have it. My dad and my hubby's mum are welcome anytime if needed. I am aware of the reality of looking after someone unwell with my Mother and other experiences I've had over the years. I would do anything in my power to make my Dads and hubby's Mum's life as nice as possible.

[RaptorInaPorkPieHat]

Nice bit of spam in the zombie resurrection post there

[ScoutandAtticus]

Vom at your twee post smalllondon.