Is it true most men would rather be with women under 35?

[adjani77]

Unfortunately for me I have been reading a lot online on the "manosphere" recently and a lot about what men think about women ( or a certain kind of man). Talk about "Sexual market Value" which basically amount to women of 30+ are basically hideous monsters to men their own age and older. I see this to on dating websites where men mostly are prepared to date women 10 - 15 years younger but will often not even want to date women the same age as them!

In the press recently 2 high profile men Stephen Hendry and Rowan Atkinson have both left their wives for women half their age (both women are also dead ringers for the 1st wives!).

I find it really depressing. I understand that we can get attracted to other people but if you have a good marriage, if your man is getting love, sex, affection and friendship surely he will have no reason to stray right?

I just don't know. Perhaps I am just worried about getting older 40 in a few years and how will that affect my partners satisfaction with me?

It seems that even men who are happy and love their wives / partners can fall in love with someone else, someone younger and transfer their love and affection to another. I guess I just need to accept that nothing is ever certain in life.

Has anyone else read any of that manosphere stuff about women and SMV etc what do you think?

[Jan45]

Older women (I include myself) are far more attractive than their male equivalents, we take more pride in our appearance and still have it, I think that's why there's been a rise in the cougar phenomenum lol. I applaud it, women have been put down because of their age for years.

As for men preferring younger models, yeah perhaps they do but then so do older women. In my city, you very rarely see an attractive man over the age of 45 whereas there are gorgeous middle aged women all over the place, it's us who have the raw deal not them!

[Darkesteyes]

Im 40 and have always preferred older men.
At 18 I had a 3 month fling with a 41 year old man (the guy who showed me what my clitoris was for)
DH is 23 years older than me (this situ is well documented on here.)
Ex OM was 17 years older than me (the chemistry there was amazing)
All of them were either on benefits or low wages.

Older men still appeal. Less likely to expect a woman to shave her pubes for one thing.

[MadeMan]

Older women do have nicer clothes, make-up, fake tan and the hair salons to help them with their appearance though. Men have the gym and Just For Men grey cover.

[Darkesteyes]

In my 20s I was a size 28 Got down to a 12/14 in my early 30s Am currently a size 16 having come down from a size 22 last year.

Ive obviously got things completely arse about face

Mind you the sort of bloke on those forums would complain about a bit of loose skin as well.

[Darkesteyes]

I don't do fake tan It doesn't appeal to me and never has.

[MNwidowed]

I find it incredibly seedy and some what abusive if a man can only find women under 35 attractive. Especially when that man is in his late 40's plus

[MadeMan]

I don't like fake tan either, it hides the complexion and I think makes people look older somehow.

Something I like about older women is their natural complexion, wrinkles, lines, freckles and all.

[MelonadeAgain]

Theres a lot of talk about this but I doubt these men would turn down a woman over 35 who was incredibly attractive.

I think people in general are always likely to be tempted by someone else who is more attractive, active or fun to be with if their relationship has gone a bit stale or if they are that way inclined. That often means someone younger, but there are plenty of examples of men being attracted by women older than their current partners.

I say this as someone who has, throughout my life, pretty much exclusively only ever been asked out on dates by younger men. I find as I get older, the age of men attracted to me stays much the same, there are many, many men in their twenties attracted to older women. But I'm not single.

[nondisperar]

I think Our Friends In the North summed it up: Nicky, who is an older man, is seduced by the beautiful young art student. Which confirms the "younger woman, older man" thing.

But she's basically getting her kicks out of a fantasy, based on hotel rooms and him playing Dominant Older Man and the trouble with fantasies is that they can be fun but aren't real? So when he turns up to see her unannounced (and she's actually in the pub with her friends her own age) she's incredibly embarrassed by him, and the whole thing.

I don't think anyone has any issue with age gap relationships (whether older man, younger woman or vice versa) which have happened naturally.

I think anyone who tends to seek out companions or lovers amongst younger people, or people who aren't peers, is a bit weird though?

I suspect the manosphere is implying that men are high fiving each other for getting younger women?

But I think most professional, well educated types would actually be embarrassed by this - they want someone who is socially compatible, not someone where everyone is thinking "fnar fnar, well I bet SHE'S after his money"? People like Hugh Hefner and Bernie Ecclestone are comedy characters. No self-respecting man wants to be part of a comedy couple. If some guy started up on "oh I bagged an eighteen year old", I think most of his masculine, normal friends would cringe inside on his behalf.

I've actually been in work situations where I'm out with an older man/colleague so if we're going out for drinks or on a trip it looks like we might be a couple.

I'm a nubile thing who looks young for her age, and its weird the looks you get, the slightly creepy comments from barmen (you even get older men then coming onto you as if "oh she's with him, so she'll be up for anything")?

What I mean is I don't think younger women feel they get any social status whatsoever from being with an older man (especially if he looks his age or older) - you just get to feel very, very embarrassed!

[HolidayCriminal]

Most men are opportunistic & lazy, they'll take what falls into their laps rather than get hung up on an ideal image.

[ParkingFred]

Most men aren't 'opportunistic and lazy'.

Some men are shallow, as are some women.

The vast majority of men I know are decent people who love their wives, even those women have the temerity to be ageing.

Of course a young woman or man is going to be more attractive than an older one, that's the bare bones of anthropology. Thankfully most adults build relationships based on more than fleeting attraction.

[olathelawyer05]

But I think most professional, well educated types would actually be embarrassed by this - they want someone who is socially compatible

Sexually, men typically want younger females. This is just evolutionary biology at work. Remember that 'society' and what we deem OK 'socially' is a construction - a form of control. Just because a man 'socially' hangs out with a woman in his supposed age-group, doesn't mean he doesn't 'want' the younger woman.

People like Hugh Hefner and Bernie Ecclestone are comedy characters

...or is this just a way for you to feel better about them being able to do things you don't approve of as regards their relations with women? I mean lets face it, Hugh and Bernie don't have to be afraid of what society thinks. Ironically, that's what having status in society does for you - you can bend society's 'rules'.

"No self-respecting man wants to be part of a comedy couple"

Ah, the 'No true Scotsman' control fallacy. I suppose the women also have no self-respect?

[superstarheartbreaker]

I just turned 36 and on my birthday I pulled a 21 year old hottie.
He couldn't believe his luck!

[Grennie]

Actually the idea that men naturally want younger women because of evolutionary biology, makes no sense. Men's sperm degenerates in quality. An older man is much less likely to have sperm that will create a feutus that, that is born, and born healthy.

[Twinklestein]

Men may want younger women, but can they pull them? Mostly no.

Young women want young fit men, not greying, balding, paunchy depressing middle-aged farts trying to recapture their youth.

Evolutionary biology works both ways and recent research showed that older men are more likely to produce children with autism, schizophrenia and ADHD.

Women spend their lives 13 onwards being hit on by delusional older guys. It doesn't get less annoying with age.

[neiljames77]

Hugh Hefner and Bernie Ecclestone would never feel true love though. Maybe that doesn't matter to them I suppose.

[WheresMeTeaCup]

People now tend to go for mates at similar educational level: so couples meet at uni, or at work (a way of having continuity in ones life).

Most professionals value career and sleep over bar-hopping. Especially if they're at a senior level or relatively ambitious, a stable personal life is very important. Maybe the caveman has been bred out of us .

Of course, like a lot have noted, younger men and women can look attractive, but that's about as far as it goes. If you've spent a long time training hard for a career/building up a good life, then you don't want to jeopardize that by getting involved with someone who isn't at the same stage of life/in a similar social group.

I see doctors marrying other doctors crazy lot but that's another thread , academics with other academics, lawyers marrying other lawyers or they'll end up sitting in their bedroom pretending to be one on the Internet .

[Darkesteyes]

It probably doesn't matter to them neil.

[WheresMeTeaCup]

Funnily enough, the one person I know of who did do the running off with the younger model thing, was viewed as a bit of a joke in his (all-male) workplace even before he did it they've now split up, so the course of true love sadly didn't run smooth

Not some debonair type flouting societies rules, but just a frumpy weird guy with a chip on his shoulder who is now a frumpy weird guy who can add sex with a younger women to his CV . Perhaps they were happy for a while.

[olathelawyer05]

Grennie - how does the degeneration of his sperm stop a man 'wanting' a younger mate? - it just means that younger mates would be weary of 'accepting' his sperm so to speak. Indeed, what you say actually supports my point, being that it is natural in a sexual/reproductive sense to want to go for younger, and of course age is not in itself a barrier to male reproduction. I can't see why this is controversial.

WheresMeTeaCup - the caveman is present. For some people its closer to the surface than with others. The drive to get ahead in 'society' IS the caveman. Law and order means we can't typically just beat each other over the head for what we want, but the beast will always out.

neiljames77 - How do you know that Hugh & Bernie will never know true love? You cant assume this just because their relationships don't conform to what society (you?) wants.

[VenusDeWillendorf]

I think men like johns depp are caught up in their own bolleaux, and are driven to having more kids.
That's why they dump the mother of their existing children, and go off with some 20 year old in order to impregnable her and spawn more kids who they will eventually leave for a younger model...... And so on.....

Luckily for us all johnny depp's are few and far between! He seems to be in some odd, bandana clad time warp.

[VenusDeWillendorf]

Sorry about the typos, blardy auto correct.

[specwecdec]

I always visualize men who use the internet to enthusiastically discuss their Theories Of Dating Women as wearing things like THIS

It represents how they are lone, brave voices in the feminazi world we live in.

[DiophantineSolved]

"the beast will out"

[DiophantineSolved]

sorry, "the beast will always out"