Can't control this jealousy :(

[Tops38]

I've been married for 15 Years,have four children,our own home etc. I'm so jealous and possessive and I hate it. Hubby doesn't go out much at all but when he does he is stupid,gets ridiculously drunk,goes AWOL,loses things. He's very friendly and the thought of him flirting makes me feel physically sick.
When he's out I sit and torture myself with what he could be doing.Each time he's planning a night out I argue with him for days before hand,I threaten divorce. I just get so unbelievably upset and angry that he's actually going out I can never say goodbye to him when he goes out,usually I tell him I hate him and not to bother coming home
We then don't speak for a day or two afterwards. It sucks but I can't help it.
My dad had an affair for years behind our backs and walked out one day and that started my trust issues.
Then I caught hubby exchanging disgusting emails with a colleague in a different part of the country years ago when I was pregnant which gutted me. Nothing physical happened,he was being stupid,they never met but it still made me wary. I know I chose to stay but I love him and he's a good dad.He's never cheated,he works hard but I just don't trust anyone and I don't know what to do :(

While I deplore violence of any kind especially domestic violence! I can't help but point out that you do admit to rather aggressively taking your husband's pillow so you do bear a modicum of responsibility for this sad affair. Stay strong sister you'll get throug this :-)

Wrong thread I think barbara

Tbh i think he deserves the shit that you give out for emailing that woman. It's unhealthy regardless.

Point is though I didn't give him shit this time. I was happy,told him to have a nice night,he promised this was his chance to show me he could've responsible. I told him I loved him and I had a lovely evening with the kids and went to bed nice and early for once.
Now it's ten to two in the afternoon and he's still in bed.

Well done for taking this different approach. You managed to uphold your end... He, however, did not. He hasn't covered himself in glory. And he could have done. You were really happy when you heard stirrings at 10.30, you'd have had a nice day together if that had been the case. But no. He didn't take the opportunity, stupid stubborn man.

I'd go for it with counselling. Treat yourself well.

Ty x
He just came down,said he was sorry,made me a cup of tea and took all the kids to the park so I get an hours peace. God..am I over reacting? :-/

Bog off with your victim blaming Barbra.. taking a pillow roughly doesn't warrant a broken nose from your husband.

And you're on the wrong thread.

I think possibly overreacting BUT you feel how you feel and you need to be happy

My DP would never take the kids to the park to give me rest. Hes said sorry and kept on touch whilst out. Baby steps and all that