The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Springing Into Spring Like Super Spingy Springs On A Springy Day!

[Mouseface]

Hello everyone, I'm Mouse :)

Welcome to the Bus, Gerald. Of course it's an imaginary Bus, and we're all aware of that, but we've been on this Bus for a bloomin' long time now so this place kinda feels like home.

See, the thing is, we're a mix of drinkers, non drinkers, total abstainers, and also posters that are or have been, somewhere in between, around the block and back again!

There are no hard and fast rules here, just No judging, No bitching about others and most certainly No expectations of YOURSELF.

No-one can say what will or will not happen whilst you're posting here. You just have to take the ride, One Day At A Time.

There are two sayings that we have painted down either side of the Bus :-

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

You've started to read this thread for a reason, and you'll either carry on and maybe Name Change (or not) and post, walk away, or realise that this is all about YOU, cry for a bit, and then come and take a seat :)

For those who would like a bit of our almost 4 year history, have a read of THIS TRULY INSPIRING THREAD

- AND THIS IS OUR PREVIOUS THREAD TO THIS ONE

We're not a quiche or a clicky group, four years is a long time and longer when you're pissed for some of it, so whilst the threads may look 'clicky', I can promise you, it's just that we all 'know' one another because we've been here for a bit but you'll soon get to know us all, who loves what (CHEEEEEEEESE), but we were all 'new posters' at one time, weren't we? :)

Oh dear god- I've spent all day with my mother and either need to kill her and build a patio or down as much alcohol as I can lay my hands on. Right. Now.

ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

Fuck me.

I won't drink (or commit murder because she has gone home now) but I might need to leave it a good long time before i see her again.Any tips on sobriety and family? run away maybe?

Right you lot! Rigid pink strap on is one thing, but we are not having a pet elephant! Enough already!
We have a dog, a squid and now, apparently, a camel!
And a sidecar
And a roof rack
And a library
And a Salvation Army band
And.. horrid baby doll!!!!!!
Who the hell is driving this here menagerie anyway?

Woo hoo! Dd2 has passed her first year uni exams. It doesn't come easy and she has to work very hard to achieve at this level so am very proud!

fab news ma quite right to be proud, bet she gets her brains from you xxxx

Well done to Ma's smart and hardworking dd!

guggs emigrate? Saves all the effort of laying a new patio. Seriously though, family/mothers can be such big stress triggers. My mum has a tendency to rewrite our history and adamantly defends whatever her current version is. Sometimes it's funny but it can be incredibly frustrating so I relate to your aaarrrgggg! Hope you regained your calm x

Hope all you other babes are safe and happy xx

Morning babes
Another hangover free Saturday morning here. It feels good. I'm going to go out for coffee and then go for a run. May go and buy crochet equipment for tonight. I think I'm going to buy black wool/cotton (wtf do you crochet with?) just to maintain some resemblance of the old, bad me. Not this nerdy, pretentious, sparkling water drinking, crocheting version. But black will surely keep me fairly normal. And on the cool chicks team.
xxx

sober your super cool babe, whether you crochet black, orange or flurescent green. Your inspiring me and many others and remind me of a butterfly emerging from a crysalis and I think your awesome. Day 13 and I have to admit I'm feeling a bit flat, the shiny newness of sobriety is wearing off and I'm not getting on great with dh. He admitted last night that he can't relax as everyone is waiting for my next bender which I can understand but I need him to have faith in me or what's the point in me having faith in myself. He has also been drinking a fair bit himself after which I can't be bothered listening to his daft conversations, how ironic is that, I'm facing up to feelings previously numbed with wine and it's a difficult journey to face the glaring flaws on your relationship and your life..., sorry thinking out loud, have a super day my friends xxxxc

Hey baby (love that song)
I'm the same with my husband after he's had a few drinks. He's a 'normal' drinker but I still get irritated and wish he'd shut up. Then I imagine what he's had to put up with the past few decades. It's slightly mortifying.
I can relate to the feeling of flatness. Is this it? But then I think I'd rather have this than that awful drunk/hungover/guilt life. As mundane as this is I am trying to appreciate the peace and find other things to keep me interested. We can't drink. It will ruin our lives and then kill us.
Had another counseling session on Thursday and it was hard work and I spent the next few days absolutely craving that 'numbness' but I can't keep doing that. This isn't easy, but it's much, much better.
I also feel rather pathetic. Everyone has issues and past lives to deal with. Not everyone uses that as an excuse to drink.
xxx

Day one again, that's three in a week! I drank way more than usual last night, not sure why, I think I just started too early and kept on. I can't blame h as he just had beer but I sent him out to get me wine.

sober I feel even worse as I don't really have previous issues. I'm an only child and was brought up loved snd adored, kinda sailed through school with great friends and studied and landed my dream job. So everything was text book.... THEN I got crohn's and married a jealous, possessive, depressed man and so began my downfall. Fast forward til now, been with my 2nd dh for 13 years, he is a decent but selfish and emotionally limited, my teenage daughter is rude and hostile and puts me down wherever possible and I miss the wonderful daughter she was, I really miss her and my adorable toddler was a huge surprise, I'm 43 but she is a joy only she doesn't sleep and I'm worn out being a taxi for an ungrateful teenager and banco de baby, then playing hide and seek with a toddler, have little time with dh and spending time with him sober is becoming less and less appealing, I resent him for not doing more with the kids or me, I found solace and a friend in wine and now I guess I'm actually bored with his lack of enthusiasm for anything or than camping with his mates, the pub and anything HE wants to do. I guess he resents me too for getting post natal depression which turned our world upside down and rendered me a pathetic, wine swigging wreck. Maybe we have drifted too far, he is lying in bed right now and I've been up since 6 with dd2 and frankly I could cry,,. I'm so sorry for the indulgent bloody ramble, needed to vent and make sense of my thoughts.

It's a brave new world this "feeling" business....,

Today I will not drink, every trigger at the ready and it's Saturday, local village event, pubs will be heaving with families enjoying the sunshine, booze everywhere and everyone gets tiddly..,.., difference is I get wrecked so I must stay strong .....,

anne - that's why taking it one day at a time is so good. Yesterday was yesterday, and this morning you can get up and start again on day 1. Does 3 x day one mean that for 4 of the days you didn't drink? If so, that's good - be proud of that

baby they say that the good thing about being sober is that you get your emotions back, and the bad thing about being sober is.... you get your emotions back. So this is a great place to vent your feelings and your thoughts - go ahead and feel free - it's got to be better than being tricked by that false friend alcohol.

The words "teenage" and "daughter" and "rude" and "ungrateful" often go together, but both of mine are now beyond that and the lovely people re-emerge. I can honestly say there were times when I despaired of that ever happening....

Oh baby that sounds very hard. Sorry. Have some big hugs. Yes, I agree this "feeling" business is bloody hard work. If there weren't the repercussions of alcohol I'd choose numb every day.

But really today is day 28 for me (or thereabouts) and it's getting easier and I'm feeling better. Just the counseling fucks everything up but then I did ask for help with my addiction so I need to accept it and trust what they're doing. He is excellent so I know I'm in good hands. Just don't feel like doing it. . fucking tough this grown up responsible attitude.

BUT tonight I'm getting back into my pristine bed. Sober and clean and I'll read and remember everything I read. And tomorrow I'll wake up with NO guilt/remorse/nauseous and nor will I have to spend the whole day pretending that I'm feeling ok and trying to remember where those empty bottles are and what I said or did. This is much, much better.

If I'm contradicting myself, please don't take any notice. I'm just talking aloud and really after all the above conversations about pink bananas anything will do.

Stay sober babes. xx

Thanks venus my GP says there's a good reason nature made it almost impossible to have a teenager and a toddler at the same time and thank god, it seems I managed it and by god it's bloody hard... Your reassurance is much appreciated xxxx

baby big hugs to you. I struggle with having young adults and a 12 year old and being 50 so I do sympathise.
Annie bloody well done on 3 AF days. I managed one. Need need need to do better. Got smart do next Saturday with a dashing brigadier and dress is too tight!
soc you totally rock!

baby your family are lucky to have you, you are so kind and encouraging to others and such an inspiration on this bus. Feel free to vent away

Ma congrats on dd's exam results, what a relief to have that over for a while. Exams put such pressure on our youngsters, no wonder they are hard work sometimes.

And now, a dashing brigadier? Do take a turn around the room with me MissMa I am quite curious to learn more...

Ma, Venus your too kind - I really feel like I'm not trying hard enough. I looked in the fridge and there some of the wine left so now I'm thinking I will not get to day 2. The ww is already saying 'it's only 3/3 units'. It's stupid I've had sober weekends before but today it feels hard.

I'm so frustrated with myself. I drank last night, and it's like I dropped all the balls. H put dd2 to bed without pullups, I did not check on her, and now I've got soaked bedding to sort out. The house is a tip and I really can't be bothered to tackle it. I will but I have made it harder for myself having to fight through this 'alcoholic inertia'. I was talking to someone this week, about tv, the internet, and we were saying how years ago we'd have found hobbies to fill our time. For me I feel like wine fills the time, tv doesn't grip me that much, and I need to find something else to concentrate on in the evening.

baby I really do feel for you, you have so much to contend with but you keep fighting back :) The times I get an af run the first thing I notice is that H and I have nothing in common. I mean I know that anyway but when we are not drinking we're sat in silence not even able to agree on what to watch on tv. Everything I'm not happy with comes to the forefront and i don't know how to deal with it. Sorry I can't say anything more helpful.

Spitting camel here, grumpy, guilty and feeling like shite, yes you guessed it, went on a bit of a bender last night

Can someone please tell me where the pink banana came from? I re-read the pages since Wednesday last night and sniggered and sniggered at the humour on this bus - I love it

Baby you are doing so well Babe and are a true inspiration to us all on this here bus. I have a DD who is 15 and she can be vile, insensitive, insulting and selfish - I do believe that this is quite normal and they will come back as Venus wisely says I think as Mothers we do try and be 'super human' and it's not always possible. Hang in there honey and try to enjoy your village 'do'. As they all start to have a drink you can remain virtuous at the fact that 'you are in control' and they are acting like Twunts xxx

Soc you are amazing, you have taken that camel by the humps and kicked that WW to the UK and back to Oz, oh look she's flying over to Canada, Beaches give her a good kick in those saggy tits, that's my girl

Beaches how are you sugar plumb? How's it going with the house sale, have you had any serious contenders yet? I'm off to a party tonight, my Mum's having my DDs and I know it will be a boozy one, with a cheesy disco in a marquee - so I will be hogging the dance floor and dancing to everything. I am looking forward to a good dance Anyway I've got to get there first (2 hours journey) not planning on leaving until 3, but in that time I need to get my grumpy teenager out of her pit, bathed (she is such a soap dodger and her room hums......nice) Anyway, onward.....sausage sandwich and a zillion cups of tea have been consumed, still feel like shit........amazing all self inflicted.....how old am I? oh yes, sorry was that 47 or 17?

Ma please can we keep the camel, he's ever so nice, I've spent the morning having a spitting competition (it's OK we aimed it all out of the window) He's got a good aim and we seem to be neck and neck.....

Many, many thanks to you all on this lovely Bus. Have a great weekend with whatever is in store xxx

Thanks everyone, your support keeps me sane xxxx

You'll be the only sane one on the bus then baby. Xx

ma well done to your dd! And to you for supporting her and getting her there.

babyj sorry to hear about your stroppy teenager - no wonder you are exhausted! Mine is nearly 12, I'm dreading that stage. Somebody once gave me some useful advice (admittedly, she doesn't have kids and at the time I thought she was talking out her arse - but actually it has helped me a bit) when you are arguing, stop and ask if it is possible to achieve a win-win situation, where everyone is happy, rather than one side having to 'lose'. I know sometimes it's impossible to reach a compromise, but quite often there may be a way out - although if you're deep in the middle of a blazing row it can be hard to see it

Three loads of laundry done and all the ironing. Taking a quick break before I get on with all the other stuff I've let pile up during the week. It's pouring down which is a blessing, I'd not feel up to taking the dds out after drinking last night Not sure how I'm going to not drink tonight - I've googled sober blogs and hope to get engrossed in one - but I'm not going to think about that for now.

soc you can crochet with anything But the size of your yarn should match the size of your hook ie. heavy wool with a large hook; fine thread with a small one.

I like to use cotton, it's more expensive than the usual acrylic but I like the feel of it. I also use really chunky yarn - which is hard to find in cotton, so again it costs more - but I justify by saying at least it's not wine Not only does it get done really fast, it's also easier to use for chubby fingers than the fiddly wee hooks.

I've thought of another great thing about crochet (or I guess knitting if you like...) it's nice to have something to do if you are listening to boring people. Like if we go to my in-laws, usually I'd be sat there wishing I could have a drink while MIL knocks back the cider and rants about whatever she's seen in the daily mail. Reading my book would be rude, but crochet is fine because you can pretend to listen, nod along, mutter "Dreadful!" or "Probably on benefits" while doing your crochet.

* this is if you are with friends or family, obviously, not at work. Don't start doing crochet in the middle of a dull staff meeting.

spanna I believe the pink banana was supplied by that daft bind indie. Probably better not to ask.
Trying to be AF tonight.
Ah yes, the dashing brigadier.....I met him through work and he has a delightfully filthy sense of humour. We discussed the business opportunities in "castling*. Its like dogging but with added grandeur....he was all for it

Well that seems to have silenced everyone.....
Where the heck did you all go?

By the way.....Day 1 in the bag!!!!

ma well done and on a Saturday too!

I'd never heard of 'castling' so I googled, and so far I've found out that it requires an "initial starting position" and a "look at a common opening". It is also the only move in chess where you can "jump" your opponent. If you're looking at the kind of ancient castles that we have around here they are mostly dark, and damp (not in a good way), cold, drippy, and smelling of pee...

Hope the Saturday crochet gang are going well.....