Staying DRY

[MrsSippie]

This is a continuation of the last thread DRY We are all doing our best to abstain completely from alcohol.

Big hugs for MrsSippie, nochips, Rachael, and everyone else

Has anyone else ever had this stupid obsession with dates in their head? I didn't drink yesterday (parents were here and was at work in the day) but I don't know that I can manage today, and tomorrow is 10 th April which sounds like a nice date to stop. Utter lunacy on my part eh!

I work as a counsellor for people with drug and alcohol problems.
And here I am.
I really support my clients and know that I can do some really valuable work...but myself? Pfffff
So I can't really rock up at AA in my home town , can I?
Are there any A A 's on here to advise, as there are lots of different types of AA meeting on the directory? If it's steps I need, then the night I can make is in my hometown....

dippy, I'd say you need a keep it simple meeting, basic shares by fellow alcoholics.
the step meetings are ok but if you happen to go one when they're covering the later steps then its a waste of time in early sobriety.
most step meetings go straight back to step 1 if a newcomer is there,1st meeting.
thats just what you need, step 1 admitting you are powerless over alcohol and your life is unmanageable with it.
good luck, I've sat next to councillors at meetings, I've also sat next to university professor's, doctors, teachers, a prisoner on day release from prison for attempted murder whilst drunk, housewifes, even an off license manager. This disease of alcoholism isn't fussy

Dippy do you have a sort of supervisor or peer mentor you feel comfortable to talk to? I am getting counselling at the moment and my counsellor is really open about the fact she got into the profession (she retrained from another career) as she had terrible drug addiction which she overcame. I really like hearing her experiences- she might be odd in that she talks about herself in the sessions. She has a peer mentor and has mentioned she finds them helpful for support and to bounce ideas off.

I really don't know anything about AA. I sometimes think I ought to go, but am frightened to do so in my town too, as I live in a village really. And it is a village that is just gossipy enough already. I have thought about going to a nearby place, or a place near work.Still a thought I am thinking about.

Oh, and thanks for kind words everyone about my relapse. I am mad at myself because I wasn't feeling any cravings anymore, so I have NO idea what I was thinking!One sip, and I am right back to the beginning.

I agree with StayingDry that you probably don't need to focus on step meetings just yet, Dippy. If you go on the aa website and put your postcode in, you can find all the meetings near you on every day - and you can see what's on offer. Totally get your nervousness about living in a small village/not wanting to blow your cover. I live in a large city so it's far easier. May be worth finding one that is a bit of a way away to dip your toe in the water?

And as StayingD says, I have had University Professors, film directors, extremely famous actors, hugely successful businessmen, you name it. In fact the last share I heard was from a Catholic priest! This disease doesn't discriminate. While I do understand your worries, I think you might find many of them evaporate if you actually pluck up your courage and show up at a meeting. Bear in mind that anyone you see there will be just like you in that they are likely to take anonymity very seriously.

Thanks. Going to a local one tomorrow night. If it's close, well it's close. I can't keep putting my clients first, got to do it for myself too.
Hope some of you lovely ladies have had a good day x

Good luck with the meeting Dippy

I am still very much sober and munching Sour Patch Kids.

Going away for the weekend, to stay with some friends who drink quite a bit. Not sure how I will do. I have to say, I find it hard to imagine sitting there and not necking the wine.
It would be really nice to wake up the next morning feeling good, and enjoy the day we have planned. Usually when ds and I go away to see friends I spend most of my time feeling pretty rough, as I don't sleep well away from my own bed at the best of times. Add too much booze to that, and it can be a bit of an ordeal.
I know this, and yet I wonder if I will make it, especially through Friday night.
I don't want to tell my friends what I am doing, just thought I would maybe say that I am trying to lose a few pounds, or want to give my liver a rest (all true). They won't be expecting an abstinent me, that's for sure.
Part of me would quite like to see the disbelief on their faces..!

Anyway, I may be posting from the bathroom in a panic tomorrow night.. hope someone will be around!

Night all.

welldone dippy I hope you hear something at the meeting that helps you
my biggest fear was bumping into someone I knew at my first meetings, thankfully I didn't.
later on it didn't and hasn't bothered me. I was now a confident, sober decent person, unashamed of who I was, and after all they were there for the same reason I had been at my 1st meeting.
only 3% of alcoholics get to an AA meeting so for every 3 there theres 97 still suffering out there
good luck, let us all know how you get on, I suspect theres alot of ladies waiting to hear how you get on.

I am over six months dry. Now the little voice in my head is asking if I can go on like this? No more drink ... ever? The little voice is niggling and the wine is calling. I know I dont need it, or even want it ... buuuuuuut I am feeling this way. I am still tired, grumpy, overweight, depressed... for some reason I thought that if I stopped the drunkenness my life would magically be perfect, and now I realise that is not the case and itis hard.

Quick update on my BM - she has also broken her wrist which they missed on Tuesday - hospitals not too good with our family this year and will be in for at least a week. Went to see her and got myw orders - have to go to hers today and pick up clothes etc, make her Ned, pit the rubbish out.... Hmmmmm. I will collect her clothes and return.

Dd2 is at a sleepover, so need to get her at some point, dd1 is 24 tomorrow and I haven:t even got her a card and she's been sobbing about 'poor grandma' down the phone,my sister is barking orders at me as she has no contact and I am FUCKING EXHAUSTED :( meant to be on holiday next week, have had to be of work, but have to go in today to sort stuff out before we go.

Oh God I'm ranting again! I was leading to a point - honest! We finally went for a meal last night to celebrate our wedding anniversary and I could have drunk a bottle of wine easily! Saw a very large glass going to a table nearby and internally screamed 'mine!'

However, I didn't. Like you scented, I'm around six months and am thinking 'forever? What? Argh!' It's daunting isn:t it? No wise words, just glad oI feel

Bum! Glad I feel well this morning - I net the huge wine glass woman doesn't

mrs sippie, bless u
take your dm her clothes, leave straight away, tell your sister to go f##k herself, politely, if shes that bothered, do it herself. enjoy your daughters birthday sober , pack up and go on holiday and bloody enjoy it.
too much stress for you chick, YOUR sobriety, serenity too important. you're an alcoholic, you're supposed to be selfish , so be selfish.
rant over, have a fantastic sober, peaceful holiday with your family, you bloody well deserve it!!

and to the lady at 6 month's whos tempted, you are at the most vunerable time, gratitude list, stay sane

to those that have been on here a while, you'll remember me telling you how I put up with dp when drunk, by talking him into promising me something I want because he's grateful for me fetching him when he's pissed. off to get my gazebo shortly, my best acquisition so far
can't sit under it with a glass of wine but hey ho lifes a bitch

Good morning

MrsSippie and Rachael, been thinking of you both, what utter shit you've both been dealt this week. I've had some awful things happen in life and the usual default for me in the past was to reach for alcohol, well done to both of you for your strength and courage. Rachael, I hope you and your DH are getting lots of support in RL, you must both be in shock.

I agree with stayingdry, get your mum's stuff dropped off sippie and get ready for a lovely, relaxing holiday, you bloody well deserve it

I'm on day 35 (I think, keep forgetting!) and I thought by now I'd be a size 6, waking up each day to the sound of celestial trumpets with fireworks shooting out of my backside. Alas no, but the Wine Witch rarely comes knocking, I feel so much better in myself and have gone from a paranoid, nervous wreck to someone who is developing just a little bit of a ROAR
I'm eating my bodyweight in cakes but cake as far as I'm aware has never made me feel suicidal and anxious so it's no biggie. DP who also has a terrible relationship with alcohol is almost 3 weeks DRY himself; I can't believe it, I'm really proud of him but still focusing on my own sobriety and as stayingdry says, it's actually OK to be selfish when it comes to protecting ourselves!

Much love to all, stay safe everyone x

stayingdry I remember your gazebo! Never mind about the wine, be much better to appreciate and remember every second you've sat under it, you've earned that treat!

I've saved up enough money not drinking to pay for a dog behaviourist to come and work with my puppy, rock and roll eh?! But he's developed a fear of strangers and what better way to help him, than giving up something awful that will also benefit my dog and help him feel more secure in the world.

great post disco, money jar working well!
can I borrow your behaviourist for the kids
and your sobrierty, absolutely fantastic, a massive well done, and your dp too . I bet your shopping bills come down one of my AA friends calls the supermarket booze aisle, death alley, love it
nice to hear you so upbeat, have a great day

I really love hearing what you have all bought with the money saved. :) Love my money jar too. Have £17 in it as of last night. :) The last thing I do before bed is put 1 pound in, and it makes me feel very proud.

MrsSippie I am so sorry to hear about your mum's injuries. The stress on you is dreadful. How long is she is hospital for? If she tries to emotionally blackmail you about going on your (well deserved!) holiday while she is in hospital just keep repeating that she will be well looked after and is in the best place and so on. You are a terrific daughter to be so caring and responsive towards her considering what she has put you through, so please do not let her manipulate you into feeling otherwise.

Sunday good luck with the weekend.

I am going to call the alcohol aisle 'Death Alley' now. That is great.

Hi everyone. :)

I fucked up. I didnt drink thru dinner, bit later, I drank. A lot. At one point though, after someone said" we have run out of wine- who is going to the offie" I said " maybe we should just have a cup of tea" but no. I wouldn't have said that before, just so you know. I am pissed, going to bed. I know better. I know more about myself now. Pah. Wine. Its not such a big deal. I am better than this. Sorry my friends.

Sunday It was always going to be a really hard hard task.I have really hard drinking friends, and if I stayed with them for an entire weekend I would probably drink just to alleviate the boredom of watching them get pissed and slurry.

Right. You need a strategy so the slip does not become a slide. Did you enjoy the wine at all? I am guessing not.Hold on to that.You have the perfect excuse to say to them today when they open a bottle 'Nah, thanks, I'll pass.Over-did it it last night...still feeling it'.

You are better than this, we all are. We are all much better than this nasty, insidious, horrible drug that robs us of power and self esteem.

Hope today is a much better day for you.

Morning all. My night was split into two, the first AA meeting, then going out drinking alone. On reflection, it was going to happen as I had some Dutch courage before the meeting, got a taxi and knew I would" walk through town on my way home". It's one of those mornings when you lie in bed thinking, did I do that, oh god I nearly did that. But that is the nasty stuff.
Anyway, back to the meeting. There were 30 people there! Good mix of men/women. Really friendly. Various professions! But yes I knew some people. Gulp. But they were great, not at all bothered and very reassuring about confidentiality. Anyway, I am beyond bothering about that too much..I need support and four really nice women gave me their numbers. A few people shared their stories and it was a lot I could relate to.
So if you are considering a meeting, perhaps give it a go. Me, I'm here on day one again, but I am where I am x

Look, Dippy, as you say - you are where you are. Nothing wrong with Day 1! And the good news is the meeting wasn't as scary as you thought it would be. See??! Let's face it, no one is going to be judgemental at an AA meeting - not as if any of us are any 'better' than each other - all in same boozy boat. Glad people were welcoming - that is what it's supposed to be like and is certainly my experience in the main. I think hearing other people talking and it just clicking and sounding so damn familiar is really reassuring. As in, I'm not in this alone - these guys 'get it'. So sod the drinking and focus on the positive aspect of yesterday.

Hope everyone doing ok today. Thinking of MrsS and Rachel in particular given what you guys are having to cope with. SO much harder without the anaesthetic…..

checking in to say hi to everyone and I'm so sorry to hear about your DH Rachael and your mum MrsS - I do hope you still get your holiday ...

I'm sober but quite unwell mentally. Signed off work and having panic attacks and horrendous anxiety. Wonder if this has been what I have been medicating with alcohol for too long? anyway was proud to be able to tel the doc when he asked " no I don't drink at all"

sending you all much love

Sorcha x

xx Sorcha.