The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Wading Through Winter Blues Without The Booze!

[Mouseface]

I'm Mouse, nice to meet YOU.

This is a thread for those who want to give up drink completely, or are maybe thinking about doing controlled drinking, or cutting down slowly, it's all up to you. And of course all addictions, so if you are taking drugs of any kind, prescription or otherwise, you're very welcome here too!

You know your limits, you know what is required, it's all in YOUR hands.

Whatever your goal, you'll find unconditional support here. Always. :)

There will be talk of drinking quite often and those who fall off the Bus will post about it, so if that is going to jeopardise your chances of complete sobriety, then maybe the DRY threads would suit you better, as they are complete abstainers, but EVERYONE IS WELCOME HERE :)

There are two sayings that we rather like here -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

For those of you who'd like some history, here is the very first thread and the reason that we're all here now. FIRST EVER THREAD

And the most recent so you can work your way back through time IS JUST HERE

The Bus may be 'mythical', but the support is real, it is honest and it will help you to achieve what it is that YOU seek, as long as you are honest with us, but mostly, YOURSELF

Mouse xxx

Welcome pudding

beaches just realised also that the longest iv done AF is day 8 and its day 7 today, given me a little buzz to keep going x thanks lovely

Is it hope or Im who wanted to get rid of their DH/P? I'm totally confused, so sorry......

Just wanted to welcome Pudding to the Bus, you will find all you need here but I need to do the bedtime routine with Nemo so will catch up with you in a while :)

I'm's dp is a violent abuser
rurals is a control freak
indies and mine are wankbadgers.
mouse's is lush!

why's dh is looking after her son until they can all be reunited.

How did it go today why?

Day 44 for me

Finding things are settling down for me. I'm still dealing with the emotions but am becoming more comfortable with them now I think. Sometimes if I feel like I need to let it all out and have a cry or yell it out I will and feel better for it - like I've had a release. I try not to feel guilty about it anymore.

Having said that, I still do have my difficult days. Today has not been too bad, but it was a long day with my toddler (out and about) and I have college work to do....and I'm very tired. When I get like this, I usually feel very paranoid (that everyone looks down on me), and worry terribly about the future (how am I going to make a decent living etc). A bottle of wine would wash all of that away for the night (but make it feel so much worse the next day). I need a hug. I'm trying to be accepting of it - this is how I feel today and it is perfectly natural and I shouldn't be scared of it, just feel it and ride it out. I'm not in any danger of having a drink as I know it won't help me. I'm just learning how to deal with life without it and that can be tough.

I'm not sure of hopes situation but think you may have her confused with me mouse I have been trying to get rid of my ex...he just won't fuck off

Don't give him a big long title ma TWAT is fine honey x

why please check in

Finding it hard now ladies could really use a joint to help me sleep.

Oh if we're talking about partners, then mine is always angry about something (and its always somebody else's fault) am actually very frustrated with him right now!

Still, not as unlucky as some of you guys on here, I know.

But... AIBU to ask that before I cough up my own money to help repair another of his dodgy cars, I want him to read something on Anger Management? But that suggestion will just make him angry...

sui can you have something to eat? A hot drink? Something to keep your hands busy?

I'll try having a normal fag instead.

Awful news. Judge denied me everything. Hinted problem was my husband, but gave no real reason at all. My lawyers are shocked, my husbands lawyers are shocked. Mid-April next court date. To decide what at this stage I dont know.

And now I have to go to work.

Oh no why that is just terrible. I cannot understand what they are playing at

Sorry for the confusion - thank you Ma

Why - sweetheart I am so very sorry that this is happening to you, something is fucked up here, someone is not doing they're job as they should, that's for sure. I have no insight into the courts when they get to this point but fucking APRIL!!!

Oh sweetie, please stay strong, easy for me to say, but stick with us and we will get you there, we'll get you to the date that you need to be. I'm just so sorry that you are in this quandary xxx

Sui - have you considered sleeping tablets, I know that you have seen your GP and I'm really surprised that they've not given you something to help you remain calm in the evenings. Or take the edge off at least, at your most anxious. It's just shocking. I really wish that you had more support that you have sweets. xxx

venus - I love you. That is all xxx

I need to go to bed, Nemo has spoken about his ex respite worker tonight, in a bad way and it has spooked me.... I need to tentatively approach the subject again and by God I nearly puke when he said he didn't want her to ever be near him again

So, I'll be back over the weekend.

Stay strong Babes sorry not to be so ace and hot with the support of the Bus right now..... I'm struggling myself but that is another story for another day when you guys are all okay, I want that more than anything for you all xxx

Sorry why I cross-posted - that is awful news.

Thanks for the welcomes!

Demented - when he wasn't trying to cut back he was drinking 2 bottles of wine most nights minus the one or two glasses I'd have. Some nights 3 or a few beers too.
Now it's rarely more than 1 bottle of wine plus the beers and only maybe 3 nights a week.
I don't think he knows I know about the hidden ones and I've not called him out on it. I don't think it would be helpful? He puts the empties in a hidden recycling box then transfers them into the main bin on bin day.

I worry most about the hidden drinking but really don't want to make it worse by asking him about it and risking him feeling got at...

I'll try to keep up and get to know you all. Thanks again for the welcomes

Sorry Demented, I'll actually answer the whole question... He talks to me to some extent, but mainly just says he needs to sort it out for himself and just needs my support. I don't know why he hides the booze cos I don't ever have a go at him...

My gp doesn't prescribe sleeping pills as they are so addictive I've asked about them before. I do have clonazepam which reduces anxiety and makes me drowsy. But as I'm used to taking them with the cannabis I'm still finding it hard without the cannabis to sleep.

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

Sui - I know they are but he should at least give you something short term, two weeks, as most of us on here have been prescribed in the past. It's to help you break your current sleep/not sleeping cycle IYSWIM?

Do you take the Clonazepam regularly? You could take them at night if he won't prescribe a sleeper, I get Zopiclone when I get really bad, I am going back to the GP next week once Nemo is back at school......

Keep at it, how are you doing on the cannabis front?

Why - hey sweetheart, how are you holding out? Do you get to see your boy at the weekends at all? xxx

Hi there Pudding :) nice to meet you, not sure if I've said hi before

Right, best get my back tush in gear, I have a Reiki session in an hour and a half so need to get everyone ready and DD is poorly.

I also need to ask Nemo more about his ex respite worker..... [gulp]

Be back later, stay strong Brave Babes xxx

mouse sweets don't jump the gun and read too much into this. It is like just to be because she made him do exercises or treatments that he didn't like, or was a bit cross with him once. Am not trying to dumb it down if there's an issue,but did you have concerns about her at the time? Any reservations? Dd1 once came home from nursery saying she hated the lovely nursery owner because she tied naughty children to their chairs! Needless to say, it was all nonsense and just because she had had a ticking off that day!!
pudding it sounds like your dh has things in hand and may need to feel he is doing it himself. Keep praising the cut down, watch out for triggers. My brother is an alcoholic and it is difficult. These things take time.
indie my friend d. Check in please.

Hello fellow babes ....

mouse hello lovely

why what mouse said, do you still get to see your son is what I want to know? Please check in x

spanna where are you?...... Hope your ok

beaches we have some sun today although its cold and I'm still waiting for my snow how's it going?

pudding you sound very supportive, I think just be there and don't push or question your DH/dp I know your not I just know that's how I am.

Hello venus x

Where is everyone today

Isindie
Sui
Soc
Pudding
Venus
Why
Ma
Beaches
It's
Hope
Dancer
Joey
Baby
Rural
Nuff
Slap
Guggs
Sweet
Angry
Mouse

Hellooooooo ho ........,,.,.,.

Oh day 8 today

I'm here.
There are quite a few babes not been around for a while. Hope all ok.
I'm in the sidecar and past caring.
Dd1 has been rude once to often for someone who lives here freeloading.I'm sick of her sullen presence about the house. She can't be bothered to engage or be civil but lives here at my expense. So I'm done with doing anything for her. Apparently there is a parcel for her with the downstairs neighbour and I can't even be arsed going down to get it for her. Petty I know,but why the hell should I? She is going to Spain next week for a week and I can't wait to see the back of her!

I didn't realise that lots of babes had used sleeping pills, I am probably one of the lucky ones that hasn't really struggled with the sleeping.

Sui Are you getting up early and trying to do some exercise during the day? Getting out in the fresh air really does help. It may take a week or two for things to settle down though. I used to smoke a lot in my twenties (daily) and particularly love the bedtime one but once I stopped I did manage to get back into a sleeping routine. I think honestly, some of it is the psycological dependence. Another idea is to try listening to something on your headphones, soft music or a relaxation recording? Stay with it, you are doing great.

Why I am not sure what to say, I can't fathom any of it, there seems to be no sense to it at all. I hope you are finding some strength to keep going.

Im DAY 8, woohoo!!! Keep going babe. Sun is out here and rapidly melting the snow - I am very grateful not to be shovelling the drive

Ma I am in and out of the sidecar too, but also not to stressed about it. Teenage girls sound scary, enjoy your week 'off' next week!

Dancer great post! learning to sit with feelings is hard sometimes and I know for sure that I have used booze to avoid it. Day 44 is amazing, well done.

A 90 minute exercise class last night has turned me into the tinman, I am sooo stiff today! I actually wished we lived in a bungalow! Anne I think I am also in the not losing weight category despite being exercising more and drinking less. I have started to low carb instead, never tried it before but have been reading up on it (and I remember Mouse saying something about size 8 jeans ) am swishing with water though

Hope all brave babes are enjoying the weekend xxx

ma I don't think its petty, how old is she?
Glad your here

Ma my dd was rude to me this morning while I was putting a dye on her hair. Not the best timing. I was kind though and didn't leave her with half a head done

pudding your dh could be hiding bottles because he feels guilty about his drinking. Why is this, do you think? Is he spending more than he ought, has he been told that he needs to cut back for his health or something?

The truth of it is that he is probably ashamed. He knows he drinks too much and is not ready to face it. If you think he would be ok just cutting back, there are tips that we can pass on to you, or he is welcome to come and post here himself, it's not just for women.