The Brave Babes Battle Bus - A New Year, A New YOU!

[Mouseface]

New Year Resolutions Anyone?

Welcome one and all, I'm Mouse, nice to meet YOU. :)

This is a thread for those who want to give up drink completely, or are maybe thinking about doing controlled drinking, or cutting down slowly, it's all up to you.

You know your limits, you know what is required, it's in YOUR hands.

Whatever your goal, you'll find unconditional support here. Always.

There will be talk of drinking quite often and those who fall off the Bus will post about it, so if that is going to jeopardise your chances of complete sobriety, then maybe the DRY threads would suit you better, as they are complete abstainers, but EVERYONE IS WELCOME HERE :)

There are no hard and fast rules, other than the support here is unconditional, it may be in the form of tough love at times, but it's always meant with the very best of intentions.

There are two sayings that we rather like here -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

For those of you who'd like some history, here is the very first thread and the reason that we're all here now. FIRST THREAD

And here is the lastest thread, which you can scroll back through to see the other JOURNEYS SO FAR

The Bus may be 'mythical', but the support is real, it is honest and it will help you to achieve what it is that you seek, as long as you are honest with us, but mostly, YOURSELF

See you soon. x

Why - we're all with you here, crap that you've had to endure more uncertainty. Fingers crossed that next week will be the end of this, and you'll be with ds and dh asap xxxxx

Hi all brave babes, big hugs to you all xxxx

Hello, tis me, Mouse

Just wanted to pop in and say tomorrow my baby girl is 15! Eeeeek!

Why - I am getting really fecked off with this on your behalf. I wish that this was over for you now, please know that each and every one of us if wishing that you had your boy safe, warm and snuggled up forever! Massive love and hugs to you xxx

rural - hope life is being good to you currently sweetheart. xxx

Hey Faire and Ma :) xxx

Sorry not to NC you all, I'm just popping in and wanted to say hello. I only read back a wee bit.

Well, off to Bedforshire, will come in next week and catch up properly, I promise. I may get to pop in over the weekend with a bit of luck. Stay safe brave babes xxx

mouse happy birthday to your wee girl - doesn't matter how old they are, they're still your wee babes!

Had a whole bottle of wine, trying to enjoy it (relaxing days off) but feel guilty about drinking...

The problem is it always leads to more

Ps. beaches how is the diet going?

Morning babes

Saturday morning here and Day 17 for me. This is the longest I’ve been sober probably since pregnancy/breastfeeding (10 years ago). So far it’s being ok. Emotions all over the fucking place but I really want to be sober. I can’t drink one or two ever, and I know if I start it will be a quick slippery slide to 2 bottles of wine a day. Things are hard, but so much better. My relationship with my husband and kids has improved tenfold. I’m more patient, more present and just much nicer. I’m also more boring, but I’ll have to deal with that. I’m trying very hard to release that inner wild child without drink. I reckon I can still be a bit mad and hilarious when sober; I just need to eliminate that ‘conditioned’ behaviour. I need to do this, I feel, because I don’t want to lose that madness I have with friends when we’re out and the funny shit we talk about and do (nothing outrageous, but just good stuff). I don’t want being sober to mean that I have to hide from life. I have loads of self-confidence and I know I don’t need alcohol anymore when out, it’s just relearning to be myself without that fucking wine. Things have changed and I think it’s been a long process, but I feel more determined and more comfortable with the idea of never drinking again. I keep picturing myself out at social functions drinking coke or tonic water and it doesn’t look that bad. We had friends over for dinner recently and everyone drank apart from me, and we still had an excellent time and I was still dead funny….(probably much more so than when I’m drunk). So it can be done. I’m 45 this year. I do not want to be a middle aged pissed mother.

Hope you’re all doing ok. I’m going to attempt a roll call here:

alias the guilt is something that I’m very happy to be without. It would be nice to be able to stop at even one bottle of wine, but I couldn’t. But don’t feel bad, you may as well enjoy it.

mouse happy birthday to your daughter.

it’s faire rural demented I’m baby spanna thurso Isinde* annie obrigada hello! Come baaaack and post….I need you all.

why dear god you’re a strong woman. Keep going. The end is in sight. Xx

Hello beaches It’s bloody hot here again. Just thought that might interest you…

guggs hope things are ok with you. I’ll come and help you with that second resignation letter.

I’m hope you’re ok too.

Anyway, all babes lurking and posting hope you're all ok and stay strong. I’m still here and always check in and read everything. Without the posts and stories on this bus I wouldn’t be coping. Knowing that there's a bus full of other nutters fighting the same battle is really rather comforting. Off to have another Coke Zero….hate the stuff actually but it’s something that isn’t water or wine. xxxx

That does not interest me AT ALL Soc I love shovelling snow and wearing layers and layers of clothes to go outside. Couldn't be less interested in hot weather!!! Huge well done on 17 days, I don't think that you need wine to make you funny, it is all there within you. Try and ride the boring feeling while things begin to reset and settle. It is also great that you are seeing yourself socializing with soft drinks, I am sure it all helps build new internal pictures to draw on. Xx

Diet? Well Joey, it is not great. I am still logging all food and exercise but I haven't had any encouraging results. I am learning about calories though, where they are hidden and how many are burned. How about you? Are you still doing the crunches and using the app? Try not to beat yourself up - you have made so many advances, loads of sober nights and always considered decisions. If you have a bottle of wine one evening, it doesn't undo all your progress - you have so much more awareness and control now. You are superb, don't forget it xx

rural I see your stunned slug has returned hope thing are going well.

Why it sounds like a positive result, even though a record and a delay are involved. The judge sounds like a rational person who is shocked at your case. It would be great if something good could come out of this for others. You are fantastic and I hope that you and your family are reunited and happy as soon as possible xxx

Hope all babes are having a good weekend xxxx

A big hello and good morning with big hugs to all of you on the bus

Sorry can't namecheck as I'm on my tablet.

Seems I'm not the only one who is finding it hard to abstain

Well, its day 1 for me tomorrow AGAIN. I remember saying before my birthday that I couldn't wait to get back to feeling great and stuff (can't remember exact words), and it hasn't happened yet

I need to buy a big calendar for the side of the fridge. I'm currently (well, was), using my little diary but keep forgetting to add days on it.

Well done sober, for day 17, thats fab

Btw, when I said it seems like I'm not the only one who's found it hard to abstain, I didn't mean that the way it may have sounded, or meant to use that face

I meant I have noticed some of us are struggling at the moment besides myself and meant face. Hope we can find the strength to get back on the road soon for a straight run.

Looking forward to day 1. Again.

Hi babes, early start today as taking dds to dance classes. That would have been unheard of for me before - I wouldn't make plans for a Saturday morning that would interfere with Friday night drinking...

Since dry january ended ive been drinking a bit. No more than a glass of wine which is better than before but I'd like to not drink at all the majority of the time, I know how these things creep up. Going out for wedding anniversary tonight then once that's over with I want to make a proper effort to get fitter and lose a few pounds. It's funny but I can't say I'm even looking forward to tonight, all I can really think of is feeling rough the next day :(

Well done on 17 days sober :)

I'm back... determined now, this has gone too far.

I haven't posted for a while. Have been having big altercations with my mum which I have been finding emotionally exhausting but also very positive in terms of feeling like I'm turning a corner in my life.

Today marks my 1 month anniversary of not drinking. Very pleased that I have lasted this long. I feel more clarity mentally (perhaps which has allowed me to articulate more clearly to my mum about her behaviour etc). In the last month I have quit smoking, drink and now caffeine drinks. Its been hard, but I'm feeling like the dust is settling and I feel much more clearheaded and "clean" inside than before.

Hello everyone
I am still lurking and at day 41 today. Some of you have such a lot to deal with right now and although I am still very new here I am thinking of you x

MrFMercury - Day 41! You are a true inspiration to us all xx

Fated - Good for you. Determined is the way to go. We're here to back you all the way xx

Spanna - Thinking of you xx

Dancer - What is it with Mums? Mine is a classic "but what about me?" person, though does nothing for anybody else. Glad that she hasn't affected you too much to go back on the drink. ! month without smoking or drinking is fantastic, you are also an inspiration xx

Big hugs to I'm, beaches, rural, joey, sweet, obrigada, isinde, soc, faire, mouse, Ma, Anne, baby, slap and thurso. You are all brave, courageous people xx

I'm determined now to start a proper dry run from tomorrow (I find Sundays an easy day to start strangely enough. Please help me :/

beaches thanks for the kind words. I'm angry about husbands and children (well, just the one husband, thank god)

and found it so helpful to log on here and read back. Everyone on the Bus is so supportive and positive!

Yes the calorie stuff is fascinating, I've found them in surprising places (like satsumas!)

Night braves babes, popping in quick tonight.

why Im learning how slow the system is not on your level honey but my dc's on protection plans and its a slow proces frustrating I want to shake the lot of them I'm considering not opening my door next Friday for my SW visit feel like telling her to f*ck off TBA they have no idea.

Struggling and feel so on my own I just don't care no more non of these 'sw' get me or him or anything I am going to sleep now so I don't have to face non of it, apologise for the me me post x

Day 39 here. Getting a bit of flack from friends at social occasions but I am just shrugging it off at the moment. Still having a hard time losing weight. Quitting booze and fags has left me with nothing but food as my stress relief! My BMI is 35 though and I am starting to worry about the long term health impact of being so obese. Am doing some exercise but the food needs to be dealt with really.

Hi all

Great to see a flurry of posts again, it had gone a bit quiet since the end of Dry January.

Fit February is really helping me stay focussed. I've lost 10lb now and not drinking is turning into a bit of a blessing for me. I love it! I'm sticking to my diet, sleeping well and feeling more motivated.

I want to lose 30lb and am a third of the way there already. Every time I think I'd love a glass of wine, or piece of cake, or any other calorie laden snack, I just tell myself I can have it when I've lost that 30lb.

It will always be there. Food and drink, readily available in this country, are not going anywhere. If I want them when the time comes, I can have them but, for now, I have to wait.

I'm finding it surprisingly easy. And absolutely loving that fresh, rested feeling in the morning, so different to the drinker's dawn.

Well done all those who are achieving or working towards their own goals. And all those brave babes dealing with difficult and stressful situations. Remember, you are not alone, we are here for you, come and post.

Isinde are you ok?

Hey babes

I'm so sorry that things are really tough for you. Big hugs- you have the bus and are not alone. x

angryfeet I get what you are saying and tbh I use chocolate quite a bit too BUT alcohol contains masses of sugar and has the potential to cause real,irreversible harm. You have done yourself a lot of good in staying sober for 39 days. And you have given up the fags? Wow! How about doing some meditation or running or take up art rather than diet just yet?

Right,I'm off to bed. Have a safe and sober sunday lovely babes

Im Welcome to my world. Even though my DS is coming back to me, it feels like a loss as I admit to things that never happened, just to get my son back. Believe it or not they also have my husband up on trial too. The madness that is the legal system over here.

You must play their game though.

Morning babes

Hangover free on a Sunday morning here. I was feeling really flat this morning so decided to write down stuff about what life is like when I'm drinking. That was a really good exercise as there was very little nice about it.

Just in case anyone is interested as there is talk of trying to lose weight on here. I lost 8 kgs recently simply by eating soup. I made loads of different types of soup and always had some available either in the fridge or freezer. I think the key was having different types so not just eating the same thing all the time. Not sure I could do it again though as soup wears a bit thin, but it worked wonders. Every time i was hungry I would have a big bowel of soup (with loads of cheese in it) and so I would avoid eating cheese, pesto and pasta which is what I default to when I'm hungry. And the weight has stayed off because I never starved myself.

I may even attempt a run today. Was thinking about my sober life and it's like having to 'reprogramme' (is that a word?) myself, as alcohol was such an important part of life. Everything revolved around drinking. But it's all good. I will keep reminding myself of the tediousness of drinking and eventually sober will be normal for me.

Hope you're all having a good Saturday night.
xx

why that's what I'm finding impossible and I'm scared my patience is running out with them and I'll flip the SW sat and told me I carnt move through local housing as the dv is in question as he says I'm mad and have made it all up eh? Hes always said that, they have seem my black eyes and my car window etc, and if she don't believe me then why don't she fuck of out our lives ? If shes not going to help us then theres no point knocking my door I am dreading Fridays visit as I think my frustration with come out in anger maybe I might need to be out, there also doing spot visits when they feel like it,
One day why one day soon we will have it our way

Hello to
Mouse
Baby
Joey
Spanna
Guggs
Rural
Isindie
Ma
Beaches
Soc
It's
Nuff
Angry feet
dancer
Mr
Anne and
Thurso

Definitely not hangover free here, out with friends last night for a meal and went to a nightclub afterwards. Nightclub! Not been to one of those in years!

Disco 2000 (i thonk its called) keeps going through my head. Which hurts. A lot

Day 1 for me. Naturally. Good morning all, by the way xx

Morning all
Quick check in, glad to see so many positive stories despite the shit circumstances some of you are in.
As for me, I have drunk 3 1/2 small stubby bottles of lager all February (the half because I fell asleep :o) I'm a bit sad to report that I actually don't really like drinking that much after all
This has also manifested itself in an "early to bed, early to rise" weekend regime that has left DH and DS a bit !
This morning I have cleaned and lit the fire, cooked breakfast, baked some muffins, done a load of washing and just got back from a 4 mile dog walk- normally I would still be in bed now.
Anyway we are meeting friends for lunch at the pub later. These are good friends but big drinkers so this should be interesting. Above all I really don't want a hangover but can't bring myself to sit there sipping soft drinks all afternoon. Time will tell how this one pans out

Manly slap on the back to all babes :)

Slap you can get through lunch without a drink and you will feel soooo great afterwards. Try just a slimline tonic with ice and lemon as a pre-dinner drink. Lime and soda with your meal perhaps and coffee afterwards?

Plan not to drink and hold out as long as you can. The only drink you have to avoid is the first one. And you can have a big pudding instead as a treat

Let us know how it goes - I'll be here polishing your halo, that should keep you on the straight and narrow

Well done on the early bed, early rise. You are getting loads done, getting your life back by the sounds of it.

Dh is busy painting our shower room this morning and I'm being a bit lazy as I'm getting over a cold. I don't want it hanging around at work tomorrow (well that's my excuse).

Soc your super soups sound lovely. You can eat cheese and still lose weight?

Any chance you could post the cheese soup recipe?

faire lol. I'm a cheese freak so while I gave up everything, I couldn't not put grated cheese in the soup.....but really that was the only bad thing I ate (and I was drinking copiously at that time too). But the trick for me was feeling full constantly. With nothing but bloody soup in me (and cheese).

Broccoli and pine nut soup was a nice one (with cheese)