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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Stepping Into Christmas With Sobriety On Their Minds.

999 replies

Mouseface · 16/11/2013 13:41

Hello, tis me, Mouse Smile

This is a thread for those who are worried about their drinking habits, relationships with alcohol, and/or drugs.

Even if you think your intake has gone up more today than the last or this week than last, come and join us on Gerald, the amazing, always room for more, fully stocked with glorious treats and donned in his Christmas Decorations, Bus!

We are a supportive thread, full of very different posters, from various backgrounds. Some of us drink in moderation, allowing ourselves the odd glass or two as a treat, or just because we're in control of our drinking for that day.

One Day At A Time.

We have those who abstain completely, and those who wake every day to Day 1 and hope with all of their hearts that they can, and will, make it to Day 2.

If you've followed our journey to date, you'll know who most of us are by now smile and we kind of have two 'sayings', that sum up who we are -

    • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
    • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

That said, we will not have any bashing of support groups, such as AA or Community Addiction Support Teams, or even other support threads, posts like that will be reported if the need arises, so 'Orange Paper supporters' don't waste your time please :)

This Bus is a place for honesty, sanctuary and safety, something that has taken almost four years for a number of very special, very lovely, very honest and caring Babes to establish.

So, come find a seat, grab something warm from the supply cupboard at the back of the Bus, it's filled with (non alcoholic or narcotic) delicious, luxury treats and HUGE fluffy quilts, plus anything else you might need to help YOU get through YOUR day a minute, or an hour at a time.

And, if you'd like to see where this all began - This Is The Reason We're All Here, The Original JWN Thread

And This Is Our Previous Thread, With Links To Those Over The Past Few Years

We hope to meet you soon :) x

OP posts:
dementedma · 23/11/2013 09:29

Welcome chit. I initially read that as clit and wondered what kind of babe we were accepting onto the bus these days! We do have our standards you know.

Well done to the day 3-ERS and the mighty socfish who gets an opal fruit for making double figures.
Bloody Baltic up here today and got a ton of jobs to do so must get cracking

Anneisnotmyname · 23/11/2013 10:07

Morning babes, welcome chit :) I'd second what faire said, I barely ate chocolate for years but in tgat time my wine consumption had gone way up!

Had two glasses of wine last night as it was one of the days I'd allowed myself to drink. Stupid really as that was the main reason I drank. Earlier id been annoyed with dh - I was painting the down stairs ceilings (he won't do diy) and he wouldn't even help move the TV, he just sat around playing on the pc - but I was passed this by the time I had wine. So now I have a slight headache and an upset stomach, which ought to tell me I should just not drink...

TrinityRhinoTheUltimateQueen · 23/11/2013 10:13

morning all

I'm not trying to be smug, I'm trying to make everyone feel that it is possible

On the 5th of december I will have been completely sober for 18 months
Grin

And my christmas food shop wont be anything like as expensive as it was when I was drinking

Fairenuff · 23/11/2013 10:22

Trin Smile Smile Smile

What fantabulous news, so inspiring, you amazing babe x

aliasjoey · 23/11/2013 10:35

Day 6

That's brilliant trin you are an inspiration to us all!

That's very interesting faire about replacing alcohol with another addiction. I do become very quickly addicted to things like games on my kindle (currently suffering serious RSI from too much gaming)

TrinityRhinoTheUltimateQueen · 23/11/2013 10:35

faaaanks Fairenuff

Grin
PurpleWolfe · 23/11/2013 11:05

Sorry to tell you that Mouse's Mother passed away at 3.20am this morning. She passed peacefully with all those around her that she needed.

I can't think of anything else to write.

Imdoingthis · 23/11/2013 11:08
Sad
FantaIsFine · 23/11/2013 11:20

Didn't post yesterday but I was reading. It was 4 units and a seriously clean house. Hope all are good.

Hi chit, I've only just started posting too. No idea how to do linky things. I am reasonably dedicated as a smoker and also try to be good about food (although chocolate and cheese somehow in my mind count as dairy staples). What's bonkers - wow the Internet is amazing for honesty - is that I was so OTT at uni and any time on and off since that I was definitely anorexic in the past. Yet vino is pretty heftily calorific, right? Anyway it's not the reason for giving it up, but I won't be sorry if a couple of pounds come off as a result.

18 months is AWESOME Trinity. Can't remember the last time I did that, but it definitely ended with a "teen".

Looking it's evenings with boozers (inc my family) I am nervous about too. I'm not in a position friends don't really get not drinking either as that kind of job, no kids, and I always have. My fave is lime and soda with Angostura. Good luck if you do go. Driving to a uni girls get together today so I don't fall foul myself!

babyjane1 · 23/11/2013 12:05

Hi babes, not been on for a while, been in hospital with severe Cronhs attack and just out yesterday, I will read back later but wanted to give my sympathies to our lovely mouse xxxx

PurpleWolfe · 23/11/2013 12:10

Sorry to hear you've been so poorly Baby. Hugs to you. xxxx

dementedma · 23/11/2013 12:30

Oh shit!
Poor poor mouse.
Don't know what else to say really except we are all here for her as and when she needs us.

FantaIsFine · 23/11/2013 12:33

Very sorry Mouse for your loss. Apologies for the earlier cross post.

obrigada · 23/11/2013 12:45

Mouse so so sorry for your loss:(

beachestoexplore · 23/11/2013 12:46

Poor Mouse, it all seemed to happen so fast. Thoughts are with them all x

Anneisnotmyname · 23/11/2013 12:58

So very sorry for your loss Mouse xx

theeverydaydancer · 23/11/2013 13:17

Hi everybody

I'm new to this thread, have not posted on it before. I have posted on MN before but under a different name. Have name changed for this.

I have come here today as I have had a realisation today that I have a problem with drink. I am sat here at home nursing a massive hangover after drinking 1 and 2/3rds bottles of wine last night. I have been drinking wine pretty much all week. I have been doing this for years, when I am feeling down and bad about myself I go through stretches of drinking at home alone to drown my sorrows. I don't have the stamina to do it longterm, I couldn't drink every day, it lasts usually a week or so and I can and have gone through quite long periods of not drinking (i.e. several months). My realisation was that even though these binges are every so often and not every day, I do feel like its an unhealthy way of "dealing" with my emotions. I have a small DD to think about. I feel so guilty for drinking last night and being so hungover today. Its also a slippery slope because I use drink as an emotional crutch I don't want the problem to escalate and get to a point where I do start drinking more.

I have decided today that I am never going to drink again. I just can't have a drink without then wanting another one so cutting down is not an option.

I've come here to get a bit of support and advice. xx

chitofftheshovel · 23/11/2013 13:42

Sorry to hear of your loss, mouse. We've never talked but you have my sympathies.

Thank you so much for all the welcomes from you lovely lot. The openness and honesty on here is brilliant, as is the support and the feedback from those who have done it and are embracing sobriety.

Most interesting about the sugar thing - I had never linked the two in my mind. I was undiagnosed anorexic as a teenager, and now the only thing keeping any weight on me is alcohol (hungover stomach can't face food but can face alcohol!). Even then I'm slipping into the under-weight category. So it is definitely time to take stock of life and sort it out.

Fucked up this morning and didn't get up to take daughter to her club. Kids watched a couple of films and ate crisps whilst I felt shit in bed. Feeling just a little guilty!

So glad I found this thread, looking forwards to the journey.
x

chitofftheshovel · 23/11/2013 13:53

oh and welcome dancer (Fanta you make it bold by surrounding word with a star, shift 8 on my keyboard).

Motivational books might help? I have Jason Vale Turbo charge your life in 14 days. Sitting, staring at me. Suppose I actually have to read it to change my mindset!!

Mamabear74 · 23/11/2013 14:40

Sad bad news mouse, my deepest sympathy. So very sad. You're always such a tower of strength for those on this bus, I hope you have strong people surrounding you now so you can take a rest and lean on them. When awful things like this happen, it makes you appreciate how precious life really is.

chit, very sorry I missed welcoming you earlier, just wanted to let you know I too am a dirty smoker. I have noticed that I am smoking waaaay less now I have ditched the wine. Having a stinking cold also helps, but I wouldn't necessarily recommend that.

Welcome also to dancer, sorry you're feeling crap today.

That was me about a week ago. I had done a few af days then got right back on it in a big way, even though I was used to quaffing a bottle a night on a regular basis, when I "rewarded" myself I went to town and drank 1&2/3 bottle and felt like dying the next day. I'm trying not to think too far ahead but do worry about doing that to myself again as a "treat" for being so good. Just gotta focus on today.

Hi babyjane, sorry to hear you've been in hospital, hope you're feeling ok today.

Hi obrigada, beaches, fanta, ma, rural, soc, purple and anyone else I have missed!

trinity special shout out to you, I have been perusing old threads and recognise you! Am so so impressed with how well you've done, thanks for coming back & updating us.

Wishing all of you lots of strength for bashing that ww if that's your plan for today. If not, stay and chat anyway!

FurdyCone · 23/11/2013 15:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chitofftheshovel · 23/11/2013 16:18

furdy i'm exactly the same no hangover on just a bottle of wine, can quite easily sink 2 bottles of wine of an evening. And like you feel terribly guilty about my childrearing abilities as a result of alcohol.

Just imagine how much more productive life would be without the hangover.

Enjoy your wine, I'm off out tonight but plan to stop tomorrow. maybe not forever but enough time to sort myself out a bit.

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to just have the one glass!!!!
x

FurdyCone · 23/11/2013 16:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mamabear74 · 23/11/2013 16:24

First steps are good furdy, welcome! I know how you feel about being a crap mum, I get eaten up with guilt over my drinking and smoking. There's only one way to tackle it, one day at a time.

When you're ready, you can choose a day where you decide not to have a drink that day. It won't be easy, it will take a bit of concentration and help from the babes, but it can be done!

Don't worry either if you're anything like me and promise to stop that day and fail. I have failed at day 1 loads of times.

Anyway, think I might be coming across as a bit preachy, sorry about that. Just really wanted to say welcome aboard, you've done a really brave thing by posting today.

FurdyCone · 23/11/2013 16:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.