Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

The dating thread 65

999 replies

Queenofthedrivensnow · 03/11/2013 22:09

Grin
OP posts:
powpow80 · 15/11/2013 08:37

Morning All. Little bit seedy this morning. That's what I get for being bold and drinking on a work night. I actually had a great night with old guy. A tad more grey than his pic but still quite attractive. The conversation flowed and I really enjoyed myself. However it will just be a one date thing for me. As he's just not that into you says steer clear of the emotionally unavailable guys. Not a lot of mentions of ex but I noted there was a conscious effort on his part not too. I'd say he needs more time to heal and I'm not going to be the girl sitting around waiting for that.

Poffedoff · 15/11/2013 09:11

I'm liking the sound of that kiss Queen.. Obviously worth the wait Smile

Saturn you hit the nail on the head when you said its a relief to know its "normal"... that's the great thing about this thread.. I thought I was being ridiculous and behaving like a teenager when I was stressing over communication with pof guy... The lovely ladies on here held my hand through the waiting game and it seems to have settled down now... even though I've known him since May we really only upped the ante in September and, like yourself, Dontcallme and Oneday I was all over the place wondering what was going on..
I was messaging him last night and was quite pissed off as he seemed to just cut off the convo midway but noticed this morning he had replied on watsapp and i didn't see it!

Thing is though, it didn't bother me half as much as it would have before, I'm still a little insecure about it all but as time goes on I'm beginning to realise he's just not the best communicator by text, maybe guys don't put as much emphasis on it as us?

superdooperpenguin · 15/11/2013 09:17

Queen - yay!

Saturn - I find it impossible not to get emotionally attached, as soon as I decide I like someone I start the obsessive phone checking! No pearls of wisdom I'm afraid other than you're not alone!

Pow - Glad you had a nice evening and well done for noting the red flags - is it the book 'he's just not that into you' that you're referring to? Is it worth a read?

Spent yesterday having a bit of a flirt with a guy on POF, he seems fun and only lives 1 mile away from me...trouble is he always seems to be online. Is this a red flag?

Stupidhead · 15/11/2013 10:44

Pah! I've cancelled tall solicitor tonight, just not into him or his sporadic contact. We've been trying to set up this first date for weeks! I have a Dave Grohl lookalike interested but he's short and a bit 'new' man.. There was a guy on pof when I first joined who I liked a lot but was scared of meeting, he deleted and has come back. So far hasn't returned my message..sigh.

So in actually going out in the real world tonight and might try meeting guys the old fashioned way!

Stupidhead · 15/11/2013 10:46

Super! You have to read 'he's just not that into you' it was my bible a few years ago. The film is pants and nothing like the book. So buy the book!

What sites are you lot on?

Hormonalhell · 15/11/2013 10:53

Welli sometimes forget to log out n so maybe that's why Super, don't write him off yet.

That's a shame about old guy Powpow, was there no spark either?

Poffed yes I think we all same when we like someone, guys included ! They just more practical and less emotional Grin

Date with Donny tonight, still not sure about him but hey it's a night out n I need it this week with a 10 month old whose teething Hmm

Hormonalhell · 15/11/2013 10:55

Stupid I'm on pof and zoosk and just bloody forgot to cancel my subs Confused

I was texting a guy with sporadic contact, got on my t**s too Grin I told him where to go but he still texts now n then but I just brush him off!

dontcallmehon · 15/11/2013 11:07

I think I may have suggested last date, so it's definitely up to geeky to sort the next date. I really do feel that he needs space, he's quite logical and analytical so will want to think about us. I do feel better that he's not looking around online. I hate this waiting around though.

saturn · 15/11/2013 12:22

Thanks poffed and super...really glad I found this thread Smile

Hope you have a good night tonight stupid Grin

stargirl04 · 15/11/2013 13:10

Hi guys, I'd like your thoughts on this. I had been really looking forward to my hot date tonight for the past two weeks - and he cancelled this morning by text!

I am gutted. He has been in constant touch all week by text and, to be fair, had complained that he was afflicted by the lurgy/ nose and throat cold, and said he hoped to be better to make our date tonight.

Yesterday he made arrangements and fixed a time and place for us to meet and it was still on. No mention of the "lurgy".

But this morning I got a text message saying he feels worse and can we reschedule? We have an arrangement next Friday with him, so he said hopefully he would be better by then.

I text back and said "Sure, no worries, Hugh (not his real name). Sorry to hear you're still feeling under the weather - hope you recover soon! x"

I am a bit disappointed he didn't call to cancel and now I am wondering if he got a better offer or if he is not as interested as I'd thought?

We used to date a couple of years ago, broken off by me as I was still heartbroken over someone else. We have stayed friends and met up again for the first time in two years a couple of weeks ago. It was amazing and his goodnight kiss set me on fire! (that's as far as it went though as i went home.)

Do you think he's got cold feet?

superdooperpenguin · 15/11/2013 13:50

Star How disappointing :( For me the deciding factor would be how desperate he is to reschedule the date - is it just being left to next Friday or he is hoping to see you sooner? He may genuinely be feeling grotty but I would still take it as a red flag - but that might just be because I'm all bitter after being cancelled on constantly by last fling!

Stupid have fun tonight and well done for not putting up with solicitor's sporadic ways! And I will order the book off amazon today!

Hormonal - enjoy the night out, sounds like you're in need of an evening off!

Don't - I am impressed by your willpower! I need to hang out here next time I feel my inner crazy lady taking over and wanting to send multi-texts!

Bant · 15/11/2013 14:34

Dontcall - if it's a case of you not wanting to arrange two dates in a row, why don't you try something like you saying that you'd love to go to the zoo/ walk in the country/ drink sambucca etc with him, and tell him to let you know when he's free. That way you get him thinking of taking you out the next time but he has to choose the time. Or the other way round, tell him you're going to have to book a babysitter for another reason (work do or something) and should you be thinking about booking them for two separate occasions?

As in - aren't you bloody well going to ask me out again?

Poffedoff · 15/11/2013 15:12

Dontcallme, whenever I got frustrated with pof guy not cementing a date I'd text him with something like " so am I to be graced with your company this weekend?" or something similar..i also used the one I need to arrange a night with the girls but so wanted to see if we were still on for Saturday?

dontcallmehon · 15/11/2013 16:06

I just want him to want to see me so much that he will do the running. I don't want to feel like I've coerced him into another date. Phone is on airplane mode again - I need him to chase me!

Lahti · 15/11/2013 17:43

Hi all, thought I would join you. I was here briefly a few months back but realised I was in no fit state for OD. Anyway I'm in a much better state and have taken the plunge again. I have a date line up for next Saturday. Thus OD has shown me how naive I have been in the past lol. I've had numerous offers of casual sex and many time wasters, but I'm getting better at navigating the minefield. Have read thru but it moves so fast I can't keep up with names, but hope everyone has a great weekend.

stargirl04 · 15/11/2013 19:38

Hi Penguin, I work nights and have no free evenings next week until Friday, when I have an early finish, and he works during the day. But thanks for your support!

I will def mark it up as a red flag though!

dontcallmehon · 15/11/2013 20:25

i just texted geeky after not hearing from him all day. It's been 30 mins and I've not heard.

saturn · 15/11/2013 21:45

He's married Sad

ladygoingGaga · 15/11/2013 21:45

dont 30 mins is not long, but I'm with you in the impatience, would be the same.

super glad to hear you are feeling better for getting rid of detective! you do deserve better.

Where is our loo update hormonal Grin

I've just got back from night away with supermarket guy, lovely hotel, bottle of fizz, dinner, another bottle. A gorgeous late night stroll round the gardens, and a juvenile jump on the trampoline Grin

Had a nice day together today, inc ice skating, it love all the hand holding and cuddling, it was the first time we spent the night together, I didn't want to go to sleep Smile

The only downside was when he dropped me off home, then had to head off to see his DC's, back to reality Sad

It is getting tougher to say goodbye to him

Lahti · 15/11/2013 21:49

Oh saturn what an absolute shit. Hope you're ok?

saturn · 15/11/2013 21:52

No, not really ...drinking too much wine and eating chocolate /biscuits...don't know what to think/do...Sad

Lahti · 15/11/2013 21:56

Wine and chocolate is what I would do too. Angry

saturn · 15/11/2013 21:58

I feel so stupid! He thought I knew! How the hell would I know?

ladygoingGaga · 15/11/2013 22:07

saturn your not stupid! and your not fucking psychic either. Why the hell would you know Confused
Sorry

Lahti · 15/11/2013 22:08

saturn he didn't think that. He is saying that as an excuse to justify what he is doing. As if you would choose to be the OW! Have you blocked him?