is anyone interested in an alchohol-free / addiction thread?

[youretoastmildred]

My name is youretoastmildred, and I am an alcoholic.

I am 42 days alcohol free.
have been a problem drinker for a long time and have often convinced myself that moderate drinking will be fine. It never stays moderate.
In this 42 days there have been certain key people that I have not had to see. I have 2 events coming up with them that will be massive triggers and I am looking for support (and very very willing to offer what support I can to anyone else)

I have lurked on Brave Babes and it seems to be a thread of successfully moderate drinkers, and alcoholics who can't / don't actually stop. (The poster who started those threads by stopping completely isn't there: I also remember some 12 step nondrinkers from the early days who don't seem to be there any more. There are a lot of posts by people enumerating what they are having or will have and whether or not this is ok but I don't see much actual NOT DRINKING EVER which is what I need to do)

By contrast, the AA meeting that I attend, while it will always have a couple of people back after a relapse, is mostly packed with people with months and years sober.

Is anyone interested in an actual not-drinking or beating other addictions thread? I am NOT saying I am not interested in talking to those who relapse. I am saying that I DO want to talk to people who aim to stop drinking.

any takers?

Probably best to just not mention the other thread then, as I said before.

um matilda If you don't like this thread don't read it ?

same advice to countless other posters on countless other threads. This is not a 'second class' thread, allowed to exist as long as we don't upset the 'important posters' on the 'other ' important thread....

FFS. I am really really incensed

and no, I have not been drinking !

Its really pushed my buttons too Mildred but I haven't managed to work out why as clearly as you have !!!

BTW I really LOVE this bottlegreen ginger and lemongrass cordial - made with fizzy water - BETTER than wine I think !!

brokeneggshells, my weekend is going well, I'm in a bit of a quandry tonight though, I sort of want a takeaway but that would always go hand in hand with alcohol so I don't know if I should just make something quick to eat but I don't really fancy anything and feel really tired. I might just go to bed and have some tea and toast....now there's an idea!
I really get where you guys are coming from, I've drank more since having children than I did before and consistently so...I actually said to my husband that after a 12 hours of doing things I don't really want to be doing (apart from actually playing with my children which actually is very little time in a day) so it was my "something for me"....

Nice to hear you found it refreshing to be in that position as a non-drinker mildred. I would have been one of parents thinking 'hell yeah, get the drinks in'. There's been many a night I've ended up with a drink in both hands at the end

Tescos does the bottlegreen kotinka although I haven't tried the ginger and lemongrass yet as I've ginger beer in the fridge still. It will be next on the list.

Good to hear you are getting on ok fiddle. Tea and toast is always an excellent plan, I live on the stuff these days. Love my carbs from bread with real butter of course.

Bottlegreen Ginger and Lemongrasss - urghhhhhhh my least favourite - coconut and lime - now you're talking :)

I had a small landmark today, I was out and about and someone showed me these handmade bottle charms and wine glass charms and I actually said " I don't drink so they aren't my sort of thing"
It made me so happy, like I am free, no actually, like I have allowed myself to be free even though I know I'll struggle at times.

I'll defo be getting some of that bottlegreen stuff, I didn't used to buy it because it was too expensive (but spending £10 on wine was ok!)

Dear God, I have just been reading through this thread and I'm absolutely astounded by that post from HQ! It probably doesn't do any of you any good to get your blood pressure up over this but fucking hell!

And I am a huge fan of the bbbb. I lurk on there all the time. I just can't get my head round someone complaining to hq about this thread! . I really cannot. I can only hope they were not thinking straight at the time.

And, really HQ, was that post necessary? Should you not have replied to the reporter and told them to think again?

I think we should feel a bit sad that perhaps some people on the bb thread felt it necessary to comment or complain to mnhq about this thread. I would like to think that the vast majority support everyone trying to get sober and those who don't maybe have some problems of their own which is a shame really. Perhaps they wanted us to get angry? Perhaps they felt threatened? All I want is to be here with people who seem to be like me and want to get sober and stay sober. I am being a bit 'omm' now because getting angry is not very healthy (rather like my diet today which for some reason has consisted of biscuits, crisps and hot chocolate! Rubbish ) I hope we can carry on and live and let live (man). I still find it baffling but would much rather talk about the best soft drinks - belvoir elderflower or lemonade for me.

sorry Mintyy x posted

my name is bumpop and I cannot drink like normal people. x

Yuke lonnika I hate coconut, unless it's in cake :)

Funny that isn't it fiddle how you don't look twice at the price of booze yet do for everything else? I do try to hide the dearer cordials and my Hotel Chocolat hot chocolate from ds but he always sniffs them out. I'm only thinking of his dental hygiene, honest.

Its ok Mrs, don't apologise.

My favourite soft drinks are ginger ale (not ginger beer) with lime juice and lots of ice, Cranberry and blackcurrant, mint tea, rock's lime squash made with fizzy water.

spiced berry is good too; and Roses Lime cordial; I also LOVE citrus diet coke, but funnily enough have drunk much less of that since i stopped drinking. Maybe I need less caffeine !

Didn't go running today as it was RAINING almost the whole day, and I want to enjoy the first run back -not find it a miserable experience ...

Day 12 for me i am definitely feeling physically better than I have for some time...

just to say, I personally would be happy to "see " and support anyone who has 'lapsed' (it may well be me one day) if their intention is to stop drinking again....I would prefer to avoid the 'moderate/occasional drinking is ok' attitude , as for me that's not going to work....

That sounds lovely Mintyy. I've ginger beer, non-alcoholic of course, and limes. Might give that a whirl. Love mint tea too as I'm a heartburn sufferer and it helps when I've forgotten to take my tablet. That's another thing that hasn't be bothering me as much too, my heartburn.

I agree Sorcha.

Hi bumpop I just had a little giggle at your name. I really need to get out more!

Part of me is scared that without a few drinks I'm just a miserable, boring bastard.

No you won't.

You will be you. Sometimes happy, up and sparky, sometimes contemplative and inward-looking.

You will get to know what you need, when other people are a good idea and when you need to recharge and have some time to nurture and nourish yourself.

I am frequently boring and miserable and a total bastard.

But I'm a sober bastard and tomorrow I might be in a different mood.

Anyone who thinks you're boring for being sober is an insecure twat who clearly has some booze issues of their own. They would be better served to examine themselves rather than pass judgement on someone with the courage and sense to start their own delightful DRY life by themselves.

Anyone calls you boring, send them round mine.

Hi bumpop you are very welcome. I cant drink like a normal person either. I have known this for a LONG time, but only now (48) am I trying to do something about it

You can't go wrong with a nice cup of tea.
I love a posh coffee
And sharp, limey faux-cocktails

Sorcha, totally. Anyone can slip up. the issue for me is the intention and the HONESTY
I don't mean everyone has to bare their soul on here. You can give or withhold as much info as you like. I just mean that within the limits that we are known to each other on here, I think we need to be able to make the odd, kind comment on that - or in other words as someone else put it upthread I am very uncomfortable with being required to "cosign anyone else's bullshit"

Thank you brickorcleat.

The irony is I'm the biggest boring bastard when I'm drunk.
I used to to think I was funny and "cool" but I was no doubt just really repetitive, rambling and in my case often tripping over into some bit of garden furniture.
Just sad really.