is anyone interested in an alchohol-free / addiction thread?

[youretoastmildred]

My name is youretoastmildred, and I am an alcoholic.

I am 42 days alcohol free.
have been a problem drinker for a long time and have often convinced myself that moderate drinking will be fine. It never stays moderate.
In this 42 days there have been certain key people that I have not had to see. I have 2 events coming up with them that will be massive triggers and I am looking for support (and very very willing to offer what support I can to anyone else)

I have lurked on Brave Babes and it seems to be a thread of successfully moderate drinkers, and alcoholics who can't / don't actually stop. (The poster who started those threads by stopping completely isn't there: I also remember some 12 step nondrinkers from the early days who don't seem to be there any more. There are a lot of posts by people enumerating what they are having or will have and whether or not this is ok but I don't see much actual NOT DRINKING EVER which is what I need to do)

By contrast, the AA meeting that I attend, while it will always have a couple of people back after a relapse, is mostly packed with people with months and years sober.

Is anyone interested in an actual not-drinking or beating other addictions thread? I am NOT saying I am not interested in talking to those who relapse. I am saying that I DO want to talk to people who aim to stop drinking.

any takers?

Pinot. . . aren't other people annoying?!?! I have just acknowledged recently that i dont know when to stop. I
have noticed that my friends and neighbours are nearly all heavy drinkers. . .it has become so acceptable to drink at home every night, i know so many who do. That wasn't something i did, but when i do drink. . . i drink too much. . every single time, do shots, sneak in doubles for myself and then slur and wobble and make a fool of myself.

I realised i was drinking to excess to mask my shyness.. .it seems to have worked as i have an awful reputation for being a party animal. not clever when you are in your early 40s. So now i am trying to remind myself its ok to be shy, i dont need to be the funniest, the loudest one in the room. . i can still be me and be funny and not wake with The Fear the next day. I just have to curb the chocolate and crisp intake now. theres always something to battle. good luck to you on your journey.

Hi pinot and well done on your three years glowingembers, I'm impressed.

I have been practically inhaling food. So hungry all the time. Then there's the boredom eating. I have shamefully ate near 30 packets of crisps from last week, a mountain of the Halloween chocolate and sweets and two camembert cheeses, amongst other stuff.

I've been full of the joys today. Helps it's been a lovely bright, crisp autumnal day here. Can feel my patience running a bit low tonight. Screaming kids for one thing or another are really winding me up. Good thing there's no wine in the house or I'd have the first glass poured no problem.

Also hungry and eating out of boredom.

Paws hoping to shift my rather attractive booze belly by Christmas but that's looking unlikely unless I can stop stuffing my face.

Also relieved there's no wine in the house as I too would be seriously tempted.
As it is pjs are on and there's no way I'm leaving the house tonight.
Kids seem extra hyperactive today after their first day back at school.
Never mind. Their bedtime is drawing closer. Thank bloody god!

Paws??? Was.

I'm having hard day today too, and a hard evening.

Feel very very irritable and, like the rest of you, have been eating like a small elephant - not hungry just feel like I need to fill my mouth with something. Agree with you all. I'm bloody glad there is no alcohol in the house or I'd be well stuck in by now. DH is out tonight - I'm quite glad as I cant be arsed to be sociable or nice! Kids will be in bed EARLY tonight ...

and hi glowingembers I wish I was 3 years sober. I'm so impressed ! and I never thought about wine boxes !!

best thing is that I like myself this is what I'm hoping for. That underneath the shame and anxiety and poor impulse control there lurks someone I might like.. at least someone I could respect...

Good evening all - well that was a long day. I couldn't commute to London every day, it would drive me mad! Just got it and am not having a drink because I 'deserve' it after a long day, just watched Corrie (guilty secret) and about to put dd to bed. Sorry for boring and inconsequential post. Will attempt to be more interesting tomorrow

Hi all, feeling hormonal (very) and cheesed of - However told everyone at work today that I have stopped drinking totally again - people know I am a bit 'obsessed' with my health - (suffer from health anxiety). So no biggie for people. Very tired, bloated stomach and just generally feel like poop -
BUT still sober - yay

The probably what it is olive, first day back at school and the other one is teething again.

Soon as I could get the both to bed Sorcha they were away. Littliest is a nightmare sleeper and can be up countless times so I'm not holding up much hope for more than an hour or two respite before she starts.

I love Corrie too Mr although I haven't got to see it for the last couple of weeks as it coincides with kids bedtime and storytime. I get the tv magazine every week even though there's no need to so I can catch up on what's happening.

Off to bed to read for a while and get an early night. Be good girlies :)

Hope you feel better soon lonnika and well done on another sober day!

Right I'm definitely off this time. Night.

Hello, I've been watching and lurking since Mildred started the thread. I read the Jason Vale book and have not looked back since, I've not had an alcoholic drink in six weeks!

I'm quite shocked at how easy it's been just NOT to drink, having been an enthusiastic consumer of wine for A LONG time.

Ho Iceberg well done ! I have downloaded that book to my Kindle and intend to start reading tonight. Do you attend AA /another groups or have you done this alone ?

PS re names for this thread

I like "Kick-It" ...

No all on my own, never been to a support group. Have you Sorcha? BTW I'm in Surrey too.

no, for lots of reasons I cant face AA. Planning to manage this alone with the support of online stuff , self help books and DH...may at some point tell some other family.. perhaps once I am more confident that I wont relapse in 5 minutes !

What benefits have you noticed from not drinking Iceberg ?

Evening all!

Like lots of you, I am eating like a pig at the moment oh well, I guess a few pounds gained is relatively minor if it keeps me sober. Currently supping on a Green & Blacks hot chocolate with mini marshmallows - my new fave treat!

I had real cravings for a glass of wine once children were in bed, as I always do after a busy day, but quickly poured a glass of peach ice tea, and then I think the sweetness took the craving away.

HumOlive- it's hard when the initial euphoria wears off, and this has been my downfall in the past when I've tried to stop. A week, two weeks in is fine for me. My problem will be in a month, two months time when the novelty subsides, and I think everything will be ok if I just have ONE glass of wine (wrong!)

Sleep well all, stay sober - will be back tomorrow!

Not so moody, a bit more stable emotionally, bags under eyes lessened, shiny eyes, not worrying about 'should I/ shouldn't I drink' simpler not to have the choice really. DH weirded out that I'll never drink again but well chuffed that I can actually get up at a reasonable hour now .
Downside is 1/2 stone weight gain as I'm now necking sweets and junk, plan is to tackle weight loss next. Ideally I'd like to lose two stones.

Welcome Iceberg. That's great you have noticed such differences in a short period of time. I downloaded the Jason Vale book yesterday. About half-way through (very quick reader), it's very Allen Carr Easy Way I think. He does make some good points. I liked that a lot of people are addicted to alcohol, makes me feel quite not so bad just I've decided to jump off at this stop before it becomes worse. Not sure I agree with all of him but reading loads of different stuff so points from here and there from different literature I'm hoping will help me get an arsenal together against wanting to drink.

Thatsnotmypinot as I stopped before during the summer for 3 weeks, I know I will find the 3/4 week mark hard.

After all my scoffing I've only put on a measly 1lb in the past week. Really trying to put on half a stone to get to my optimum weight as drinking wrecked my appetite.

Day 7 and finally entering the feeling hungover stage. Will be a hard day as I have a couple of hours to myself every Tuesday and always go out with a friend shopping, which inevitably leads to a glass or two of wine, leading to more when I get home. Had a dream I drank last night and was so bitterly disappointed in myself so will keep that in my head.

LOl - I think the dream that you are drinking must be really common when you stop - I have had it too.

Not feeling great today but ok - good luck with today broken :)
see you all laters x

Not been on here for a bit. My brothers wedding was good - I had a glass of good champagne for the toasts and nothing else!!

Daily grind is back now, but I feel a bit lighter having got this wedding behind me.

Struggling with the realisation I will never be able to artificially raise my mood again with alcohol or anything else for that matter.
Am feeling pathetically nostalgic for the effects of drink.
What a short memory I have.

morning people

good to see you weegiemum and well done on the wedding !

Today (day8) was the first day I can say I woke up without feeling like i'd had a skinful last night ... feel decidedly clearer headed today. Also flat depressed and cold, but I think that is to be expected.

Hum, I get that :( It's a weird thought isn't it :( BUT..just fast forward to the bit past that initial niceness and picture how quickly it ends and how awful it really is. That's what I do, and am going to have to keep doing. It's not easy though is it .

Same here Mr M.
Realistically it never ends well and each binge makes me feel worse than the next.
I think I'm mourning the fact that I've stuffed up my chance to be a normal drinker.
What could've been a pleasure in life occasionally has been destroyed by my inability to handle drink appropriately.

Just got to keep muddling through.

You haven't stuffed it up - you can't do it that's all. Some people just can't. I have tried and tried and tried but it's hopeless. Going out and looking at people who have soft drinks and thinking oh my god what is WRONG with you? when it is clear that the only person that there is something wrong with, is me! Thinking I'll only have two tonight but being so stressed out at the thought of 'only' two that it just makes me more miserable than having none; being angry at the thought of going out and watching everyone 'enjoying' themselves. It' bloody horrible but the 8 months I managed to not drink were absolutely fine! the world won't end, and actually it will be ok. God knows why I started again!!