Hi..
Im writing here because i need opinions. My gut tells me I'm not loved my heart, keeps lying to me...i don't know what to do
My name is G, I'm 30 years old and have two children from previous relationship
I have a new relationship since december last year
I meet P online. He was great, our first dates went great, feel in love with him very fast because among other things, he was there for me in a very difficult situation i was going thru at that time..
He used to be so in love with me, he used to pay me compliments, he used to buy me gifts, call me 10 times a day, he used to be very romantic...i fell in love with his so bad
In february we moved in together...and thats where everything changed...
Slowly he stopped complimenting me, he stopped kissing me, holding my hand, talking to me,seeng me...
Now I'm 2 months pregnant, i am very depressed and don't know what to do. I cant get to him, i tell him every day what i feel and ...we end up fighting, he said he still loves me but he never shows it to me...Never!
Im gonna try to give some examples of his behaviour and how he has changed
Sex...sex in the beginning was great, he was so committed to me, to my needs, he used to say thats what makes him happy and satisfied...now sex lasts 5 min and its nothing to do with me....it feels like he is miles away and he does it just because...he needs it from time to time...sometimes once every 2 weeks and i usually start it.
Romance...its just not there, we don't even kiss anymore for days..
I remember one day at his house, beginning of our relationship...he hugged me tight once and said thats something he could do forever, he loves just to hold me....now he never does it anymore and if i hug him, i feel how all he wants its for me to let him go
I went out with some friends, i had my hair done, nice makeup, nice outfit...he not once said: u look good baby...nothing! He doesn't even see me anymore
When we used to walk on the street he was pulling my hand to his hand, he looked so proud to have me...now we walk like strangers...and when i ask him why he doesn't hold my hand anymore, he says 'I'm not a holding hand person'
Im 30 y old and he is 48. He used to have no problem with that, now when i ask him why he has changed, why he treats me like that, why he doesn't compliment me anymore, why he never has anything nice to tell me, why our evenings are always the same...he ignores me and watches tv and i just wait around for him to need me, to talk to me....he tells me : maybe its the age difference, maybe we don't have anything in common. We have different needs....You are to sensitive, you want to much, im not the touchy touchy kind of person...
I used to cry my eyes out, ...i cried so manny nights...while he just snored near me in bed, he doesn't care when i cry, he doesn't seem to have any emotion, any empathy for my pain...nothing
I stopped crying, i realise now that i cant cry anymore...last evening he came home. He sat in front of the tv with his ipad...he hasn't said a word to me
I asked him if everything is alright..he said yes, i asked again, he almost shouted at me....everything is fine... And thats all the conversation we had..i felt so hurt again....but i just couldn't cry anymore,. I went up and went to sleep...i didn't wanna see it anymore, i wanted to pretend he didn't ignored me...I'm pretending so much that everything is ok while I feel i die inside..
After all this, if i ask him if he still loves me...he says yes..where is that lovE? Why isn't he showing it? Does he even love me ?
Im devastated, i hate being home, i hate the evenings when i know he will come home and ignore me and i know that will hurt me...
Thats just the short story because now...i do feel like crying..need to stop a bit