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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He's finally gone (for those that remember my threads)

114 replies

VitoCorleone · 28/09/2013 09:20

After months of shit he's finally gone.

Some of you may remember my past threads where he would get drunk and say really nasty, hateful things to me and have me in tears most weekends.

He then promised to stop drinking in the house couldnt give it up full stop eh but stopped drinking in the house and things where ok.

Last weekend he came home with a crate of fosters and sat and drank one after the other, i was too scared to say anything about the promise he'd made so ended up just goin to bed early.

Yesterday he text me from work asking me to get him cans of fosters. I point blank refused, reminded him of his promise to me, told him i WILL NOT be spending my weekends on edge worrying wether im going to be on the recieving end of his shit. He didnt speak to me when he got in from work, not one word all night.

This morning he got up and declared he was going to the other side of the country to see his mate. Yep how great it must be to be able to get up and fuck off out like that with no consideration for your partner and kids eh?

Then he started going on about "when its my birthday im April (!) i want to be having a drink to celebrate"

It dawned on me, alcohol is more important to him than i am. Always has been, always will be. He said "you know what, i havent even got anything to say to you" as he was heading to the door. I said "your a cunt when you drink but you know what? Your a cunt when you dont fucking drink aswell"

Ive told him not to come back tomorrow. Just fucking off this morning like a single man not even discussing it with me, well thats done it for me.

Phones getting switched off, me and kids going out fpr the day, he can jog the fuck on and not come back

People are supppsed to look forward to holidays and weekends, not me, i fucking dread them. Not any fucking more.

OP posts:
VitoCorleone · 29/09/2013 09:15

Im fine. Nothing has changed i still feel like i did yesterday. As far as im concerned i should have got shot after the last incident, well this is my chance to do it.

Pretty angry with myself for letting him take the piss out of me for so long, nobody else would have got the chance, im the type of person who, if you cross me once you NEVER get the chance to do it again, you will just be dropped out of my life completely.

Reckons he was trying to "prove a point" that he can do whatever he wants, but really regrets it. Yes well im sick of him trying to prove points, i have my own points to fucking prove now.

OP posts:
FauxFox · 29/09/2013 09:22

You sound ace vito - sounds like you are well rid, well done Brew

EhricLovesTeamQhuay · 29/09/2013 09:35

He's sorry now that he's spunked £500 and has a hangover. Yeah right. He's not sorry and you know it. He's sorry for himself if anything.

Please, please stay firm on this one. He's awful. Being in your own is a million times better than being with a cunt like that.

VitoCorleone · 29/09/2013 09:43

Reckons he found a house for rent round here yesterday and keeps giving me last chances to change my mind. Im not changing my mind. Its a done deal now. His behaviour friday and yesterday done it for me.

Shot himself in the fucking foot didnt he? Trying to "prove a point" well he proved it, he's a selfish immature twat.

OP posts:
buss · 29/09/2013 09:45

He found a house for rent while on the piss on a saturday afternoon...? Course he did!

VitoCorleone · 29/09/2013 09:56

Before he went over to the north east apparently

OP posts:
buss · 29/09/2013 09:59

my what a busy boy he was yesterday!

will he have to go to his mum's or something now? what an idiot.

SpookyNameChange13 · 29/09/2013 10:05

Reckons he found a house for rent round here yesterday and keeps giving me last chances to change my mind

Im guessing he hasn't found anything and he is taking the opportunity to get you to backtrack and say 'come home' if you did do that he would be lording it over you in seconds.

He is full of shit. call his bluff.

QuintessentialShadows · 29/09/2013 10:08

Just tell him it is great he has found a house, you wont expect him back.

Then, get the locks changed, pack up his stuff in binliners, put outside the door, text him to let him know all his stuffed is bagged up outside your house.

QuintessentialShadows · 29/09/2013 10:09

But be pleasant, no swearing or ranting. Be mindful that any text you send him can be used as evidence of something.

Can your phone save outgoing messages in the message log also?

RandomMess · 29/09/2013 10:53

Absolultely send him a text to let him know his stuff will be able to collect from x 0'clock on the front door stop and then block his numbers Grin

Will be soooooooooooooo theraputic bagging is rubbish up.

BillyBanter · 29/09/2013 11:07

Absolutely what others have said.

Bag up his stuff. Tell him it's outside for him to collect and to put the keys through the door. don't respond to texts except to reiterate that it is over, he needs to collect his stuff and you don't want to see or hear from him again.

change the lock anyway. It is quite cheap and easy to change a mortice lock (the lock with the big key) in a wooden door. you just need to get the right fit. Get someone to look after the flat. Unscrew the plate holding the lock. Take to locksmiths and ask for a matching one, probably about 15-20 quid. take it back and put it in the door, screw plate back on.

VitoCorleone · 29/09/2013 11:09

He's took his stuff and gone, telling me "theres no going back"

Im done

OP posts:
QuintessentialShadows · 29/09/2013 11:10

Well, good!

RandomMess · 29/09/2013 11:11

Fab x

BillyBanter · 29/09/2013 11:12

Yay!

Lweji · 29/09/2013 11:15

Good.

Lweji · 29/09/2013 11:19

Be aware that if he still has a key and you don't change locks, he may well decide to go back later.

Does the council know he lives there? Is that his registered address?

SpookyNameChange13 · 29/09/2013 11:21

Yay! Flowers

Good riddance and welcome to the rest of your life.

SpookyNameChange13 · 29/09/2013 11:21

Yes, change locks as soon as possible.

Lweji · 29/09/2013 11:25

He is punishing you now. Once he realises it doesn't work, he may well punish you by going back.
You don't really want to post that thread.

InLoveWithDavidTennant · 29/09/2013 11:40

well done op!

but please change the locks! you really dont want someone like him coming back, making himself at home and never leaving. now he's out... make sure he stays out!

and stop texting him!

lagertops · 29/09/2013 11:44

Good riddance to that wee fanny.

VitoCorleone · 29/09/2013 12:48

Fucking hell ive just had a fag - i had quit 6 weeks ago.

OP posts:
SpookyNameChange13 · 29/09/2013 12:49

You can quit again don't worry.

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