Please can we stay here, I've just seen these - on the other thread and this is still a live thread :) I don't want to miss anyone :) xxx
guggenheim Wed 04-Sep-13 18:59:24
"My heart really goes out to thisis and jango, you sound so sad and tired of the drinking. Keep reading and sharing and posting, you're not alone at all. x
Alcohol is highly addictive, for some people that first drink starts the craving that leads to the other umpty billion drinks, that's what being an alcoholic is really. I'm not a bad person but I'm not in control if I choose to drink. These days I don't drink.
I go to aa because I enjoy meetings, I have friends who I can say anything to and they will just listen. Same as the bus.When I first started to go to aa I went so that I wouldn't drink that evening and because people were kind and friendly even though I was a mess.It's stayed that way except I don't even want to drink now. Previous to that I drank for 20 years, just naice amounts of wine every night and as many parties as I could manage.
I was an extremely unhappy and lonely woman when I joined the bus last year. Sitting indoors drinking is an isolating experience and I was very disassociated from my feelings. With help of the bus and aa I stopped drinking and began to find out what my feelings were, some of these were extremely painful. I thought about abuse in childhood and my mother's ongoing mental illness which had left me resentful and angry for most of my life.
Once I had stopped drinking I was able to tackle these feelings- with MASSIVE amounts of help from the bus and aa. I have spoken about the abuse and taken the power away (and will never see my father again as long as I live), I've accepted that my mother is ill and unhappy most of the time. I'm ok with that now and I can see that she does love me in her own capacity. I'm no longer anxious. I can detach from crazy things that happen at work or with friends- they aren't in my control so I just stop worrying about them and let go.I get on well with my husband who has put up with my drinking for years on end.
So, my point is this: I'm a very grateful recovering alcoholic. I've been relieved from a massive burden of anger and fear. If I can manage it then anyone can, with some help from the bus / aa/ any RL support. I intend to go to meetings from the rest of my life so that I won't be tempted to drink again. I'm a very happy person now.
If you feel you have got near to that rock bottom level then please,please look for as much help as you can get."
AND THIS ONE
omghelpneeded Wed 04-Sep-13 19:44:58
"So many of these posts really hit home. I also drink because I am lonely and unhappy which makes me more lonely and unhappy. Day1 now after feeling crap all day! It should have been a very happy day as dd special birthday but im so low just now"
Sorry but I don't want to miss any cries for help :) Off to bed now, ready for Nemo's first big full day at big boy school!! It's amazing how fast and well he's settled in :)