I don't know where to start

[SolihullBorn]

The only thing I know is that I'm flying to New Zealand on Monday to bring my little grand-daughter (4) home to England just as soon as I can. My darling son and his dear wife were killed there just 3 days ago so I'm flying out. I have no proper idea what I'm going to have to do when I'm out there. I have a few contact addresses and of course I know where little Amy is being looked after but I don't even have a key to my son's house. I've no idea if either of them made a Will or anything about their finances. What about the funerals? I just don't know where to start. Amy is going to be so sad and confused leaving her home and her friends and I don't know what to say to help her. I need help or a checklist or something.

My family are praying for yours.

I'm so so sorry. I wouldn't start planning any funerals until the DIL's family have been informed. Just take each day as it comes. First priority is Amy. I'm sure the British Consulate can help you and the NZ police might even have some of their possessions, including house keys.

My condolences at this awfully sad and shocking time.

Thoughts have been with your family since I first saw this thread. I hope you are all coping, I cannot imagine how difficult this all must be

Another update from Mr SolihullBorn

Things are moving slowly. Little Amy's grand-father has had to return to the UK as he had used up all his compassionate leave. The two grand-mothers and my son are still over there.

The two Wills left everything to each other and then to Amy so that at least was simple. There wasn't anything useful about who should look after Amy if the worst did happen because my son isn't yet married.

There are specialist firms who will ship the bodies home. We would all like them to be somewhere that Amy can visit as she gets older.

It isn't obvious who would be best to look after Amy until she is grown-up. We would all want to do it but that isn't quite the same thing.

There were no obviously suspicious circumstances about the death. Just horrible bad luck.

Just seen this.

Am so sorry for your loss and wish you all lots of strength to get through this.

I am so sorry to read about this. I will be praying for you all.

Thank you for updating, Mr Shb.

It is likely that a decision will be made and stuck to regarding your Granddaughter. I hope it doesn't take too long as grief can take hold and make things very difficult. They have recently changed the law so that family carers get more rights and benefits. Can't remember the details though, but it might make life easier for you.

Stability will obviously be the key factor for your granddaughter.

On a practical note, Mr SHB, if Amy comes to live with either set of grandparents, you will get brilliant advice from Family Rights Group frg regarding support and financial support etc.

As a grandparent kinship-carer (though not through such tragic circumstances) I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.

Only just seen this. No advice but just wanted to say that I'm sorry for your loss xx