The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Off On A Journey Far & Wide, Full Of Support, With No Reasons To Hide.

[Mouseface]

Hey, I'm Mouse, one of the Brave Babes on this Bus. :)

We're heading to sobriety, in various different ways, in our own different ways, some of us are there, some not quite yet.

We're a group of non judgemental, mothers, wives, partners, sisters, daughters, girlfriends, and of course all of the male equivalents that run alongside those 'tags', but most of all, we are, or we have been, just like YOU. :) Real people with real concerns about how much we are drinking all of the time.

Our relationships with alcohol are varied, and you'll find most of us are wanting to do something about it..... desperate to stop the cycle of drinking, stopping, drinking, stopping, drinking more, stopping for shorter periods of time and then the reverse, doing ever so well and then 'something' happens and you're back to square one, a place that sometimes gets a little crowded, one little square filled with lots of people who all want out.

Sound familiar?

You're never alone here. Ever.

Come and take a seat, post or lurk. We won't bite but we WILL look after you, SUPPORT you, if you want us to. :)

And for those want to know how we've ended up where we are today, about three years on from THIS THREAD RIGHT HERE

To our last thread JUST HERE

It will be lovely to meet you so why not take a seat and have a gossip about all things booze related but also, DCs, husbands, wives, in-laws, out-laws, and everything in between.

There's always a seat for YOU xxx

Bloody hell purple I wish it was!!!! Ahem, I mean, gosh no...

How are you doing lovely?

I have taken intoxicants this evening, I'm on the lemsip. Rock'n'roll.

Well end of day 5 still AF which is pretty good seen as though I've never been able to get passed day 3 or 4. Bring on day 6 nite everyone x

Hi Guggenheim,

You're quite right and I shouldn't suggest she needs to drink (although we always have a lot together. But she has way better brakes than I do and doesn't find the odd dry day such a challenge). After a subsequent message tonight I think it was more down to her thinking I'd want to bugger off early doors and be less fun in THAT way rather than not drinking, but that wasn't how it came across earlier on.

Apologies if anyone feels I misled, but it made me feel shit at the time and it certainly read as being about the vino rather than anything else.

I have no doubt that won't be my last post! Thanks to all for reading...

Evening all and welcome fanta

Back from the pub after drinking one glass of wine mixed with a pint of soda. Left because I was tired and it was a good time to go. Sensible and happy :)

I think on edin's system I am about 20/2. That's good enough for me :). Night all, sleep well x

Hi Guggs Lol! How hard is it to resist Champagne?! In Welsh Wales at the moment. Two bedroom cottage - so I'm sharing the double bed with wriggle arse DS2 (age 7).

Was doing really well on the abstaining front until......XP came over on Thursday evening to help me change a wheel over with the spare (oh, weak and feeble woman that I am. Have you ever tried to get those wheel nuts off?) and lo and behold, he turns up with a bottle of wine?!?! Only five days off the alcohol but it went straight to my head!

And, now I'm on holiday so it's really hard to be disciplined. Sigh. We're here for 10 days and guess what? I only went and invited XP to stay the weekend next week! Said he could have one of the single beds in the other room and DS1 could kip on the floor in a sleeping bag. He was so shocked (so was I, tbh!). He made a huge effort to get the maint. to us early (he doesn't have much work on at the mo) and there's no way he'll get a holiday this year. Besides, we still get on great and make each other laugh - I just can't have him in charge of my financial well being ever again.

Right, must go and get on with holiday things. Holiday Hugs to all!! xxx

Feeling cross with myself - when do feelings of health anxiety related to damage I may have done subside do you thnk - so convinced I have done bad damage yet rationally know that by giving up alcohol I am doing the right thing anyway - gah !! Just wish this guilt would stop !

Hi Ionnika,

If it's any help - it was going to my GP that helped me earlier this year (Feb) that helped me out initially and I still see him. I was quite honest that I was shitting myself about having an enzyme test; I was convinced my insides were starting to ache.

His words to me were "our bodies are stronger than we think" which wasn't meant in any way to be an encouragement to continue that way at all. Instead, to help me focus on not agonising over the potential ill-effects, but that giving up was the most important bit.

If you are worried and would like to know you could ask for the blood test for your liver enzymes checked, but I am still way too scared...

Thanks Fanta xxxx -

lonnika you have had a good period of abstinence, i think fatty liver starts to heal after 2 weeks. You are doing really well babe. Don't dwell we can't change the past but we can change the future :)

Thanks both - I know rationally - it is the irrational me that worries too much - if only I had worried this much at the time - ah well onwards and upwards - hope everyone has a good day - we are going on a long family walk much to my sons disgust x

Lonnika, I know exactly how you feel. It is really worrying BUT the moment you stop drinking or cut right down you are reducing your chances of alcohol related ill health.

My dad was a alcoholic and on the very rare occasion he went to the Dr and said he was worried about liver damage, the answer was always the same - stop now and you should be fine. I can only assume the fact he walked in, was coherent and not yellow/collapsing/whatever meant he had the chance to change things.

In terms of all the other stuff like breast cancer etc, you are reducing your risk every day that you don't drink. None of us know what the future holds and there are never any guarantees unfortunately and that also applies to people that never drink at all. Try not to let these worries overshadows your new life easier said than done I know.

Thanks everyone who replied yesterday, I have been substituting wine with ice cream but I am just getting heavier and heavier which In itself is making me unhappy. I need to get a grip in that next now that I am having slightly less battles with the WW.

Babyjane was also right though, it is also about facing up to life without wine, just getting through every day and dealing with the day to day stuff without that crutch. Over time I have got used to not drinking while working (ie the last few weeks) now I need to learn how to not drink through while not at work too! I suppose it is only natural that it feels strange. Hopefully by my next holiday it won't be an issue.

Sorry not to NC I will try and go back and read and post again.
Stay string everyone

Pink X

Well obviously be string if you want to. But I meant strong!

Hi guys
am still here lurking!
day 8 here. Feeling great, peaceful, calm and together. If only I had tried this years ago do think I d look back on an easier time.
Sat is always a challenge for me. Staying in so that makes it easier
plan is to as always keep busy, walk dog, maybe do some gardening. Also need to choose some wallpaper and paint want to revamp downstairs. Anyone got any good ideas for colour combinations?
Have lost nearly half a stone!! need to exercise now also but small steps..
Will name check later guys. Keep on keeping on xxx

Thanksfor all the replies
Pink - Your weight loss will come - I live sorbet - and solero lolly's a treat but a lot less calories than ice cream. I also have taken up walking a lot - it has a two fold affect - frisky it staves if boredom and secondly makes me feel great.

Good luck - (hey we have done a week !!!!!).

lonnika I do understand and feel the same, I also suffer from health anxiety. I've had CBT and it helps me to challenge the thoughts. Someone said to me this week that I looked so much better and all the puffiness had gone in my face. I feel bad that I've looked so awful for so long. I've 'wasted' so much of my life living in a half life, sedated every evening.

BUT I cannot change any of that just channel that sadness into making changes now. The future is brighter xx

Well done jango

Made it day 6 wahoo feeling happy :)

well done Jango and Thisismytime
x

I'm really worried keep getting short spells of anxiety normally these are gone by day 3 or 4 now on day 6 have I pushed body too far will I be stuck with this now

Evening babes

purple you sound good and it makes me very happy to think that all is well with you. Enjoy the holiday with wiggle bum et all.

fanta please do keep posting. I don't think your post was misleading,it's fair enough to worry about how sobriety will affect friendships.
hope all is well with everyone, pink and ionn and green and jango and thisis

Hi ladies how's everyone's night panning out I'm end of day 6 still AF a little concerned about anxiety pangs which i keep getting thought id feel fine by now. Just been cleaning and found some vodka for some reason it felt like a test (as mad as that sounds) the funny thing is I hid it wen drunk about 3 week ago and not been able to find it since and for some reason found it tonight so I tipped it away did not feel tempted what so ever !

Hi. I have thought about posting on here so many times, and here I am finally doing it. I know I have a problem with booze, and I know that DP does too, and its so hard because we both enable each other, but I hate how he is when he is drunk. And I sometimes think that when he is lying comatose yet again, that I drink even more out of anger and hurt and frustration. I know it's no excuse, but does that make sense?

We have a 17mth old DS together, and my 9yo DS also lives with us. We are cramped into a tiny 2 bedroom flat with no prospect of moving, and life feels pretty shit most of the time. DP is full of self-pity because he hates his job. There literally hasn't been a single night that I can remember when we haven't had a drink (vodka and coke). I stopped when I was pregnant, but DP kept on, and I was often left sitting alone while he was drunk and asleep. I love him, but his behaviour when drunk is horrible and sickening. I know that I must be drunk too, but I still stay awake for the boys, and look after them. I just want this to stop. I want to stop, to be able to just have a wee drink on a Friday night or whatever, and maybe if I do then he will too, but I know there are no guarantees. My dad was an alcoholic, and died aged 55 because of it. I don't want my boys to go through that.

Sorry this is so long. I feel better for getting it all down on the page. I don't know how I will go about stopping, especially if DP buys booze, but I feel I am on the right road.

Hi BamBam, I'm sure the more experienced babes will be along it a bit but I couldn't not answer you.

I've only been here a few days and I've found the support to be fantastic. I'm now 6 days AF (and have managed a sober Friday and Saturday, which is brilliant for me!) and I feel so much better already. I'd love to be able to drink "normally" too - I don't yet know how I'm going to do that but I know there will be support here to help along the way.

Keep posting and good luck x

Hi BamBam - I can give you my thoughts if you like - however I am no expert and my husband doesn't really drink (well vodka and come at the weekend and on holiday).
IMO - you can only do something about our drinking nd that is what you have to put all your energy into - maybe when our hubby sees you cutting down/stopping he will do - however maybe he won't
Good luck on your journey - :)
My quote of the day
Noone said it would be easy they just said it would be worth it :)