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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Off On A Journey Far & Wide, Full Of Support, With No Reasons To Hide.

999 replies

Mouseface · 23/06/2013 23:19

Hey, I'm Mouse, one of the Brave Babes on this Bus. :)

We're heading to sobriety, in various different ways, in our own different ways, some of us are there, some not quite yet.

We're a group of non judgemental, mothers, wives, partners, sisters, daughters, girlfriends, and of course all of the male equivalents that run alongside those 'tags', but most of all, we are, or we have been, just like YOU. :) Real people with real concerns about how much we are drinking all of the time.

Our relationships with alcohol are varied, and you'll find most of us are wanting to do something about it..... desperate to stop the cycle of drinking, stopping, drinking, stopping, drinking more, stopping for shorter periods of time and then the reverse, doing ever so well and then 'something' happens and you're back to square one, a place that sometimes gets a little crowded, one little square filled with lots of people who all want out.

Sound familiar?

You're never alone here. Ever.

Come and take a seat, post or lurk. We won't bite but we WILL look after you, SUPPORT you, if you want us to. :)

And for those want to know how we've ended up where we are today, about three years on from THIS THREAD RIGHT HERE

To our last thread JUST HERE

It will be lovely to meet you so why not take a seat and have a gossip about all things booze related but also, DCs, husbands, wives, in-laws, out-laws, and everything in between.

There's always a seat for YOU xxx

OP posts:
dementedma · 11/07/2013 18:22

A quick hello from Krakow. Having a lovely time. I count 6 churches, a cathedral - and what a cathedral! - a synagogue,two fab museums,a boat trip, a tour of the Jewish quarter, an art gallery ( but that was a mistake) and lots of cafes and shopping so far! Off to the salt mines tomorrow if we don't get lost - going to brave public transport and rely on my half dozen polish words and phrases.

Mouseface · 11/07/2013 21:01

Ma - I'm so pleased that you are enjoying yourself, to a degree? Grin

Salt mines are awesome. I went to a spa that has a salt cave, it draws out impurities in the body and helps to heal your circulation etc. I am very Envy that you're going there. Please enjoy yourself lovely lady xxx

Off to put the boy to bed, he can't sleep in this heat. Sad even with mummy next to him.

Be back in a mo xxx

OP posts:
Mouseface · 11/07/2013 22:39

Back and off to bed all in one hit! Grin

Night lovely Babes xxxxx

OP posts:
venusandmars · 12/07/2013 01:22

I've got far too much to do, hence still being here [working] at this time of night ( isindie are you out there...? )

I'm a bit overwhelmed with work, but I know that there is no way that I could have coped with this if I'd been drinking all week - so although I'm tired and fed up and pissed off about a couple of people, and disappointed that dp hasn't loaded the dishwasher, and worried about getting stuff done by tomorrow midday ....... (and all that shit)......... - at least I'm doing it.

And thurso warm congratulations - you will find that the first 6 months in a new job can be blissful: the politics of stuff just don't seem to irritate you or upset you - it''s a fabulous phase so make the most of it xx

MsGee · 12/07/2013 07:45

Hi, not sure how long I'm back for but today I will not be drinking. I'm not thinking beyond this one day.

I will be back with a plan later...

babyjane1 · 12/07/2013 09:32

mcgee good to hear from you, thurso your going to be fabulous, a new challenge, a new you x x x

aliasjoey · 12/07/2013 10:42

I said I?d come back and tell you how my weekend went. Sorry not to read back properly, at the moment life is just a whirlwind of concerts and leavers assemblies and The Prom?

[and agreed with whoever upthread mentioned that mouse always manages to remember everyone?s names and backgrounds ? aint? she a star?!]

So? what a fantastic sober weekend I had. We went to visit a friend, where we often get very merry together. On arrival they said they didn?t have any wine, and I replied that was fine, as I was trying to cut down anyway and I would wait and get something the next day.

We didn?t get back til late the following day, and they said there was still no wine. So I would have had to drink beer or something which I don?t really like. Friend made the offer of a drink (half-heartedly, perhaps because I?d said I was cutting down?) and I hesitated? and just realised I was too tired and didn?t really want anything. (well I did kind of, but not a beer, and not having to scavenge through the cupboards for something else so late)

Next day, we went out for lunch, everyone else had a pint or something at lunchtime ? I didn?t. (don?t actually even want that during the daytime) Walked round a farmers market where there was an opportunity to buy wine ? thought there?s no point as we won?t get home until late.

It just feels so good to think, yes I still want a drink sometimes but on my own terms. And if it?s not available, I won?t have a strop and send someone out to buy it Blush

And all of this because of the support and advice of every wonderful Babe on the Bus. I really think I?m managing to beat this. (But I can?t become complacent, it is something I have to keep an eye on? maybe for the rest of my life)

Joey xxx

obrigada · 12/07/2013 13:55

Joey, you rock:)

greeneyed · 12/07/2013 14:09

Well day 6 here all was well till today. DS tantrumming all
Day and I can feel my blood pressure rising. Has friends to sleep over two. I am not a natural child carer! This would usually result in cracking the wine open this evening to peel myself off the ceiling! Going to try cold shower and dog walk instead to calm down as soon as DH is home ! Hope all babes enjoying the heat, very stifling here today which is not helping the kids! X

Mouseface · 12/07/2013 14:33

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

Well, Joey - WELL DONE on a sober, wonderful weekend. :)

It just feels so good to think, yes I still want a drink sometimes but on my own terms - this line that you posted really struck a cord with me, that's how I feel. Isn't it great? That feeling of not needing a drink to enjoy yourself. xxx

MsGee!! - fabulous to see you again and that you won't be drinking. I hope you're okay? xxx

Thurso - I hope that you are okay and that today is a better one, almost the weekend so you can try and switch off a little bit from it all? I hope xxx

Venus - I hope that you managed to get some sleep lovely lady, you must be exhausted. xxx

Ma - I hope your holiday is going well still and you have had some time for just you. :) xxx

I am wearing a maxi dress today, because I can! Grin

OP posts:
Mouseface · 12/07/2013 14:44

Oh dear Greeny - sorry that DS is behaving like that :( Nemo has had a great day at school but I can tell that it's friday and that he's getting naggy. Here, have a {{{hug}}} xxx

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aliasjoey · 12/07/2013 14:50

thanks you guys, it really did feel brilliant to not feel that desperate anxiety of "Is there any wine, do we have to go and buy some, I shouldn't really..." etc. Very smug Grin

Also, last week I decided to shake things up a bit. If that makes sense. Usually I like my wine room temperature, quaff it down nice and quick. I thought I would chill it first, which had an interesting effect of making me wait. Plus, maybe I'm getting all psychological here, but thought it all helps to break a long-ingrained habit - just doing things slightly differently?

Tried the same again last night with some G&T that DH bought (and I asked him not to buy any more alcohol during the week) and.... so unused to drinking in the week that I completely forgot it was in there!!

Maybe I'm cured Woo-Hoo!! Only joking, I know it never goes away.

aliasjoey · 12/07/2013 14:52

how is everyone today? Hot? Smile

baby how are you getting on?

purple are you there, lurking? Is that you I see hiding at the back of the Bus?

obrigada · 12/07/2013 14:55

I am baking here Joey, I am way too overweight to enjoy this good weather:(

Mouseface · 12/07/2013 15:59

I'm loving the sun and off out to get some more colour in a mo, I always use a high factor (30) then I tan and not burn.

It's the village fete tomorrow and I'm helping for the preschool tombola just for an hour, it pissed it down last year so this year we should rake in the £££s with a bit of luck! Grin

Right, ice pops and garden here I come! :)

Silver - you said you'd come back, are you there lovely? xxx

OP posts:
greeneyed · 12/07/2013 17:20

Thank you mouse the kids are fighting and I am literally mainlining nicotine from my electric vapestick whenever I can get out of sight. Dh home soon counting the minutes!

greeneyed · 12/07/2013 17:21

Well done joey please send me some of your resolve!

greeneyed · 12/07/2013 18:52

Well DH comes back sits down watches the ashes (despite having been told I'm at my limit) mayhem continues to ensue. Flounced off with the dog. Got back they have thrown all the toys in the rancid waterbut, including the ones they sleep with (cue melt down at bedtime). I'm now hiding upstairs and told DH i'm not coming down! I REALY Want some wine right now!

greeneyed · 12/07/2013 19:24

To top it off just unpacked bag for kids sleepover and the mum has put a bottle of red in as a thank you! How fucking ironic! The WW is pissing herself right now! I'm not going to open it, if I do it would probably be gone within an hour! Quiet here tonight, hope you are all having much more relaxing evenings out there xx

Mouseface · 12/07/2013 21:29

Greeny - I'm here. :)

Don't drink the wine, it's not worth it babes, get yourself an early night, you sound shattered. Or if I'm too late, enjoy it, it's a present not a necker so enjoy the taste rather than using it to block your day out. And how about just have two glasses at most? You are worth more than that, more than the fuck it button.

Here, have some Nemo Huggles? and a squidge from me. xxx

Off to bed and watching some Zombies with DH. Village fete tomorrow and I'm signed up for an hour. Deep joy Grin

Night all, it's quiet as Greeny said, I too hope you're all busy and not getting wasted? It's so over rated!

Be back tomorrow xxx

OP posts:
greeneyed · 12/07/2013 21:41

Thanks mouse i haven't opened it. In part as DS is still up! Friends are in bed and he has refused to go kept waking everyone up and not stopped yelling. DH left me to put all three to bed. DS never been so naughty. I smacked his bottom Shock . He is downstairs now, only so he doesn't wake others up. At my wits end, feel absolutely wretched :(

guggenheim · 12/07/2013 22:01

greenythat really sucks,poor you.

You need a break not the booze,although in the circumstances I can see how a glass might be appealing.

Can you get outside for a breather? Try counting backwards and forwards while taking long breaths? I do that when I need time away from Ds. I don't have the mental space for meditation so counting and slow breathing helps.

Tell Dh that he is in charge tomorrow and go out for the day.

Poor you. If you can stay away from the bottle then you will feel better tomorrow.Look after yourself lovely.xx

guggenheim · 12/07/2013 22:02

p.S joey- you sound amazing..

Lots of love to you all x

greeneyed · 12/07/2013 22:49

guggs bless you for responding to me :). In bed now, wine unopened. Just ate most part of a large bag of maltesers I was saving for DS and DH to share watching a movie. Sod em Grin. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Family get together so more hands on deck for the kids. 29 degrees here today which I don't think does them any favours. ASDA first thing for a very large paddling pool! How are you. guggs hope all is well. C

lonnika · 13/07/2013 05:16

Morning - what's happened to my sober sleep -gah- not slept well at all !!!!
Feeling stressed but not sure why - the WW came calling due to my stress but the thought of my dying liver batted her away. BUT I have not slept well :(
Green well done - will join on trip to Asia for paddling pool - going to be hot hot hot here today :)
Laters if I am not asleep :-/. L